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Funny satire stories about gun control

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President Trump Waxes Philosophical Regarding Gun “Control” and Other Matters

Funny story: President Trump Waxes Philosophical Regarding Gun “Control” and Other Matters

In a rare moment of philosophical reflection, United States President Donald Trump shared with a small circle of parents and teachers pushing for stricter gun control laws his deeply considered views on the matter. “What is 'control,' anyway?” que...

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NRA Sues Florida

In yet another brazen display of sticking your tongue in a plug socket insanity, the NRA have decided to sue the state of Florida for enacting limited gun control laws. Apparently the NRA won’t be happy until six year olds can buy automatic weapons s...

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CNN and Lawmakers: "We Should Ban all Cars;" We Need to do This!

Funny story: CNN and Lawmakers: "We Should Ban all Cars;" We Need to do This!

According to CNN, "auto accidents kill too many, we need to ban cars and guns..." After another tragic shooting in our nation, CNN and others are pushing to ban all guns. A talk on gun control between two high school students after the fact was ca...

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NRA Demands Funding Cuts to Mental Hospitals

Funny story: NRA Demands Funding Cuts to Mental Hospitals

In a televised appearance Friday morning, NRA spokestwit Dick Shuter demanded that the U.S. federal and state governments immediately stop funding psychiatric facilities across the country, and also stop supplying mental patients with free anti-psych...

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Everyone Safe After Florida Man Guns Down Intruders

Funny story: Everyone Safe After Florida Man Guns Down Intruders

A Florida man and his family are safe, thanks to his quick thinking, and gunning down intruders on his front stoop. "I heard a knock at the door," says Robert, a thirty six year old white male from Tampa. "I grabbed my AR33 assault rifle and went...

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Police raid BBQ party because kids were playing Cowboys and Indians!

Funny story: Police raid BBQ party because kids were playing Cowboys and Indians!

Hertfordshire UK: Police stormed a BBQ party after a nosy neighbour complained about the stench of burning meat; she's a vegan! However, initially the police ignored her call for help because there ain't no law against BBQing dead meat (well not yet...

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Gov. Bourbon Signs Conceal Carry Law That Allows Children to Carry Without a Permit as Long as They Have a Valid Kindergarten ID Card

Funny story: Gov. Bourbon Signs Conceal Carry Law That Allows Children to Carry Without a Permit as Long as They Have a Valid Kindergarten ID Card

BISMARCK, ND--The state legislature of North Dakota today signed into a law a Conceal Carry bill that would allow children to carry a firearm as long as they possessed a valid kindergarten ID card. Gov. Doug Bourbon, eating lunch at his favorite b...

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Gun Opponents Suddenly Find Themselves Up In Arms

Funny story: Gun Opponents Suddenly Find Themselves Up In Arms

Gun sales, which fell by double digits following Donald Trumps election, are shooting back up again with help from some unlikely customers. Former gun control activists, life long liberals and terrified middle class white people are purchasing weapon...

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Legendary "good guy with a gun" yet to be discovered

Funny story: Legendary "good guy with a gun" yet to be discovered

Despite many years of searching and the six hundredth mass shooting in the U.S. this week alone the legendary figure of the "good guy with a gun" is yet to make an appearance. One of the most enduring characters in American folklore, alongside th...

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NRA Complaint: Obama no longer selling guns

Funny story: NRA Complaint: Obama no longer selling guns

Washington (SAPP) - With the Obexit just months from now, President Obama is no longer the primary source for gun sales. For 7 straight years, US gun dealers have attributed the increased sale of guns and ammunition to Barrack Hussein Obama. The NRA...

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Editorial: Restore the First Amendment to the Founders' Intent

Funny story: Editorial: Restore the First Amendment to the Founders' Intent

(Editor's note: This article is in response to recent concerns about the Second Amendment, and should be interpreted as part of a wider debate, especially on gun control. This article was passed along from a deep thinker who uses a pseudonym. -- Edit...

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Obama orders creation of No Walk List

Funny story: Obama orders creation of No Walk List

Washington, D. C. - President Obama doubled down on his anti-second amendment rhetoric today, announcing executive action to create several new lists along the lines of the "No Fly List", including a "No Work" list and a "No Walk" list. Reaction was...

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NRA Demands Tighter Controls on Body Armor Sales

Funny story: NRA Demands Tighter Controls on Body Armor Sales

NRA spokesmilf Sierra Paylin caught the first available flight to San Bernardino (She even spelled it right!) to address the press with regards to an issue that has been bugging the NRA for years: "How is it possible for any deranged nut in this c...

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Worst Mass Shooting in U.S. History

Yesterday morning, everyone in the lower forty-eight states was killed or critically wounded in the worst mass shooting in U.S. history. Investigators from Canada's RCMP and Mexico's Policia Federales issued the following joint statement (as they...

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James Madison Addresses the Nation

Funny story: James Madison Addresses the Nation

HEAVEN--James Madison, from his final resting place in heaven, today addressed the nation about the barrage of school shootings afflicting the United States. The text of Madison's speech follows: My fellow Americans, Many of you know me as one of the Founding Fathers and the fourth President of this great nation. Fewer of you are no doubt familiar with the many contributions I made to the...

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Newscorp announces a new 24/7 news network, GlockNews, to provide exclusive mass-shooting coverage.

Funny story: Newscorp announces a new 24/7 news network, GlockNews, to provide exclusive mass-shooting coverage.

New York, NY: In a statement today, Rupert Murdoch announced a new cable news network to focus solely on event details and aftermath coverage surrounding mass shootings in the United States. A Newscorp spokesman, Ted Trigger said, "The sheer amount o...

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Lafayette: Feeling good about ourselves

Funny story: Lafayette: Feeling good about ourselves

Bobby Jindal says it's the wrong time to talk about gun control and he should know since he w as told by other Republican politicians who say this each and every time something like Lafayette occurs.  When the grieving is over, assuming Republican p...

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N.R.A. Announces "Heat Packin' Pastors" Program

Funny story: N.R.A. Announces "Heat Packin' Pastors" Program

Washington D.C. The NRA is drawing ire from gun control lobbyist over a program aimed at helping pastors in low income communities obtain hand guns and free target shooting courses. The Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence called it "audacious and...

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