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Funny satire stories about greenland

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Funny story: Donald reflects

Donald reflects

"Danes are jerks", mused Donald Trump philosophically, reflecting on his recent rebuff from Mette Frederiksen, Prime Minister of Denmark, following his bid to acquire Greenland. "I'd 've built 15 golf courses by Christmas, a gold mine, I'm tellin'...

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Funny story: Greenland to Consider Entering The Witness Protection Program

Greenland to Consider Entering The Witness Protection Program

In order to hide from the advances of Donald Trump, INTERPOL has discussed entering the country of Greenland into a witness protection program to hide the entire country from President Trump. "It has never been tried before, of course, but we feel...

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Funny story: Greenland Files For Restraining Order Against Donald Trump!

Greenland Files For Restraining Order Against Donald Trump!

Denmark has filed in international court for an official restraining order against Donald Trump visiting or attempting to build any kind of "tower" in Greenland. "This restraining order prevents Donald Trump from coming within 500 miles of Greenla...

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Funny story: Scientists Still Looking for a Cure for Whatever It Is That Trump's Got

Scientists Still Looking for a Cure for Whatever It Is That Trump's Got

Science Town, USA "We knew it was going to be bad once we started looking into it" spoke a leading scientist at the most recent Science Convention. "Yes, but who would have thought it could be THIS bad--and it's spread to the whole family!" said...

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Funny story: Trump Reveals He’s God, But is Then Told by Danish Prime Minister that He Still Can’t Buy Greenland

Trump Reveals He’s God, But is Then Told by Danish Prime Minister that He Still Can’t Buy Greenland

Washington - After revealing to the world on the White House lawn that he is actually the Most High, Son of Man, Chosen One, Savior of Israel, King of Kings and Lord of Lords, President Trump was told by the Danish Prime Minister, nevertheless, his d...

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Funny story: Trump Threatens War with Denmark

Trump Threatens War with Denmark

Mar-A-Lago, FL President Donald Trump, looking to save face as the world laughed at him for trying to buy Greenland, threatened to declare war on Denmark yesterday. "Greenland is part of our Manifest Destiny. If Denmark doesn't want to sell us wha...

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Funny story: Romney To Challenge Trump in Presidential Primary

Romney To Challenge Trump in Presidential Primary

Salt Lake City, UT - United States Senator Mitt Romney has agreed to take on Donald Trump for the Republican nomination for President. "It's time for a run," announced Romney in a midnight tweet. "And I'm not talking about a quick jog around the...

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Funny story: In a display of righteous indignation, Trump slaps sanctions on Greenland for obstructing purchase of Denmark.

In a display of righteous indignation, Trump slaps sanctions on Greenland for obstructing purchase of Denmark.

“I’ll get what I want to make America great again” said POTUS. “I have the right weapon,” he added, “to use against persons or countries who stand in my way-- Lethal Sanctions! Designed to bring whole nations to their knees. Look at what I have done...

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Funny story: Trump Buys Greenland, Immediately Orders Americans to "Burn Coal Like Hell and Thaw that Sucker Out"

Trump Buys Greenland, Immediately Orders Americans to "Burn Coal Like Hell and Thaw that Sucker Out"

Washington - President Donald Trump, successful in his bid to buy Greenland from Denmark last month, ordered all American industrial plants, utility plants and consumers to burn coal and any other high carbon dioxide emitting fuels nonstop to hurry u...

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Funny story: Trump Offers to End All Danish Social Programs and "Make Denmark Great Again” if it Hands Over Greenland

Trump Offers to End All Danish Social Programs and "Make Denmark Great Again” if it Hands Over Greenland

Copenhagen, Denmark - President Donald Trump doubled down on his offer to buy Greenland from Denmark, promising to send his team to the diminutive European country and raze the "destructive and pervasive socialism running rampant there". In return,...

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Funny story: Trump contemplates hostile takeover of Greenland

Trump contemplates hostile takeover of Greenland

Despite the insistence of Greenland’s government that the semi-autonomous Danish territory is not for sale, President Donald Trump is pushing ahead with efforts to purchase Greenland with or without its approval. Describing the acquisition as “ess...

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Funny story: Santa Claus detained for flying sleigh while drunk, Christmas cancelled

Santa Claus detained for flying sleigh while drunk, Christmas cancelled

Santa Claus has been detained after flying his sleigh under the influence, it has been reported. Claus, aged 1,744, from the North Pole, was intercepted by American jets and forced to land at Thule Air Base in the Qaasuitsup region of Northern Gre...

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Funny story: U.S. Construction Workers and Cowboys Being Retrained for Fresh Water Retrieval

U.S. Construction Workers and Cowboys Being Retrained for Fresh Water Retrieval

NUUK, GREENLAND - In a cooperative educational program between Denmark and the U.S., America's laid off construction workers and cowboys will be retrained for fresh water retrieval in Greenland's vast ice sheet which covers 81% of the country (677,85...

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Funny story: Angelina Jolie Wants To Move To Greenland

Angelina Jolie Wants To Move To Greenland

NEW YORK CITY - Angelina Jolie has stated that she can no longer put up with all of the rampant rumors about Brad Pitt being unfaithful to her. She said that the latest rumor to come out of the rumor mills has Brad cavorting with a young Hooter's...

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Funny story: Eskimos disagree that nudity in public means free speech; it's f+++++g madness!

Eskimos disagree that nudity in public means free speech; it's f+++++g madness!

Nudist lovers in San Francisco where the weather tends to be slightly kinder to the naked body than Alaska, Greenland, Iceland, Siberia, etc, are claiming that nudity in public means "free speech". The San Francisco authorities have passed legisla...

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Funny story: Lindsay Lohan's New Perfume Is Now Available

Lindsay Lohan's New Perfume Is Now Available

LOS ANGELES - Lindsay Lohan has just completed shooting on the film Liz and Dick about Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton. She is thrilled that she has received such nice praise for her portrayal of the woman who has been married 8 times. Lind...

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Funny story: 'Charles Atlas' blamed for global warming scam

'Charles Atlas' blamed for global warming scam

London - Legendary American body builder Charles Atlas may have been behind exaggerated stories of glacial meltdown scientists admitted today. The 'careless' tittle-tattle resulted in 15% of Greenland's coastline being deleted from global warming...

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