The commonly-held belief that insects have uncommon intelligence was comprehensively dispelled today, when a fly that landed on a child's plastic toy, not only did not have a 'sixth sense', it didn't even have the sense it was born with! * The hou...
Living in a hectic world in which many pride themselves on being so busy that there’ll be “no flies resting on them” has made for rather a tough row to hoe for Nashville fly, Freddie Diptera. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m busy, too,” said Freddie. "I'...
St. Louis, MO - A black fly dominated the town hall presidential debate in St. Louis, landing on Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton's hair and nose, before being killed by Washington University authorities. University authorities were embarrassed...
BILOXI, Mississippi - Everyone has heard of a Flea Circus, but the folks down in Biloxi, Mississippi, are all excited about a fly that was discovered on Cletis "Hooch" Collywobbles' hog farm. According to local veterinarian Dr. Herbert "Boo Boo" N...
NEW YORK - Sandlot Andy, the chair of the baseball Playing Rules Committee, today held a press conference to announce new rules. At its May 2012 meeting, it voted to incorporate the extended infield-fly rule to apply to ground balls. Henceforth, any...
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, who frequently describes himself as 'a suave and sophisticated man about town' (Somewhat misguidedly, it has to be said.) was reduced to a jibbering wreck last night following a horrific terror attack shocker perpetrate...
Neurologists at Northern Michigan University have released a study that confirms the ability to capture the final brain activity of most insects at the moments just before death. Working predominantly with Black Flies, a species that can outnumbe...
The general Secretary of the United Nations, Banksy Moon held a summit with world leaders, including Barak Obama, David Cameron, Fred Shred and a chap who was a runner-up on X-Factor, to discuss the potential for a no fly zone in Libya. However, f...
A woman in her sixties has been charged with Grievous Bodily Harm by the Health and Safety Executive after swatting an 'annoying' fly. Mrs Palmer from Scunthorpe was dusting furniture in her living room when the incident occurred. "It was buzz...
Oxford, England: In a breakthrough for neuroscience, scientists at the Costalot Coffee Oxford University have given a fly false memories using a laser. The work was announced by Professor Vissarion Meerschaum. His team had spent painstaking month...
News just in reveals that Iranian spiritual leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei has declared a global Jihad on US President Barack Obama, following his appearance on an American television where he demonstrated his fly swatting abilities. The Iranian l...
(Jun 19, Washington) - The president has been getting lots of kudos for a lightning-fast, Mr. Miyagi-worthy swipe he employed to slay a pesky house fly that was buzzing him in mid-interview during a taping with CNBC that airs next Monday. I contac...
WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Barack Obama has made the White House fly that he killed prior to an interview the most famous fly since Jeff Goldblum's 1986 motion picture The Fly. The Calliphora Vicina Fly did not have a snowball's chance in hell o...
The son of a fly, cruelly swatted by US President Barack Obama during a TV interview, today extracted vengeance, according to the fly. In a carefully guarded statement, the fly revealed its revulsion at the President's casual murder of it's father...
Arlington, Va - In a measure to deflect an increasing backlash from animal rights groups and republicans regarding President Obama's fly swatting incident, the White House announced today that it will seak to erect a new monument to adorn Arlington C...
WASHINGTON, D.C. - PETA, The People for Ethical Treatment of Animals has criticized President Obama for killing a fly that was flying around during his interview. The executive director of PETA Mimosa Ledbetter said that she was shocked as she sat...
Washington, DC - As a result of President Obama executing a fly during a CNBC television interview, calls came in from the PETA organization, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, for the President's immediate resignation. "It's an outrage,...
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