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Currency Markets In Turmoil

Funny story: Currency Markets In Turmoil

There was an uncomfortable day for many in the Foreign Currency Market yesterday, with many of the world's major players involved in an erratic rollercoaster ride. The US dollar performed well against Sterling, opening at £0.75 and closing at £0.7...

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Bitcoin Volatility Won't Put Me Off, Says Moron

Funny story: Bitcoin Volatility Won't Put Me Off, Says Moron

The spectacular crash of the Bitcoin cryptocurrency early this week shook the financial world to its roots, but not all 'investors' were crying in their beer. Arnold Blimp, an 'amateur speculator', first became interested in Bitcoin when it was fi...

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Finance Ministers lacking Financial Acumen are victims of crafty Advisors

Funny story: Finance Ministers lacking Financial Acumen are victims of crafty Advisors

An inquiry into the Banking Collapse in Ireland has called a former Finance Minister to account. Brain Mccowswaine's answer to awkward Press Questions , tended to the claim that, he and others, were acting on the information available at the time...

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ISIS expands oil business to include gas stations with cafes plus religious services at the barbecue out back

Funny story: ISIS expands oil business to include gas stations with cafes plus religious services at the barbecue out back

Current reports indicate ISIS is not only looking for managers for its oil refineries, with a $225,000 annual salary, but also establishing a chain of gas stations across the middle east. The name CALron is being considered, inspired by Chevron,...

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Rich Stingy, Working People More Generous

Funny story: Rich Stingy, Working People More Generous

Between 2006 and 2012, the wealthiest Americans became less generous with charitable donations, as a share of their total income, while lower- and middle-income Americans reached farther into their pockets as they witnessed the need for charity in th...

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Congressional Inquiry Finds That Spending More Than You Make Can Contribute To Financial Difficulties

Funny story: Congressional Inquiry Finds That Spending More Than You Make Can Contribute To Financial Difficulties

Washington D.C. - A recently concluded inquiry by a joint Senate and House committee has concluded that spending more money than you make could be a contributing factor to having financial difficulties. The inquiry lasted two years and cost an es...

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Instead of MBAs, Wall St firms will now hire Bullies from Middle Schools

Funny story: Instead of MBAs, Wall St firms will now hire Bullies from Middle Schools

In a joint press conference held on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange several Wall Street banking and investment firm executives issued a statement about the future direction of talent acquisition in the beleaguered industry. It was made publi...

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Goldmine Sacks Holds Record Amounts of Pipeline in Storage

Funny story: Goldmine Sacks Holds Record Amounts of Pipeline in Storage

Just revealed, the Wall Street banking firm Goldmine Sacks has rented up new warehouse storage in the range of trillions of square feet. The purpose is to hold miles of pipeline in abeyance and readiness, depending on need for implementation in upcom...

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King warns of 'triple-dip'

A grossly overweight island ruler has warned nearby islands in the South Pacific that he is thinking of plunging into the sea three times this weekend. King Blubbablubba is King of Splishisplashi - a tiny island half-way between the Philippines an...

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Coffee Chain Takes Over Spain's Banks; Euro to Be Replaced with the Starbuck

Funny story: Coffee Chain Takes Over Spain's Banks; Euro to Be Replaced with the Starbuck

Madrid - The Starbucks Corporation has injected a shot of caffeine into the world's financial system, taking over Spain's devastated banking system so it can replace bank branches with Starbucks outlets. "Banks are not cool," said Dylan Prather, E...

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Maryland Housewife Loses Lottery

Baltimore, MD - Despite six days of careful planning, Janet McNary learned Wednesday that she will not be receiving a lottery jackpot of over two-hundred million dollars. The 34-year-old McNary, a financially concerned housewife from the suburbs of...

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Payday Loans Come Under Scrutiny As Interest Charges Reach 760,000% APR

Funny story: Payday Loans Come Under Scrutiny As Interest Charges Reach 760,000% APR

Controversial 'Payday Loans' - short term loans offering cash at exhorbitant interest rates, which borrowers are supposed to pay back on the day their wages are paid - came under scrutiny today as a Dorking woman revealed that after borrowing £20, sh...

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Bank of America Backs Down From Debit Card Fees

Funny story: Bank of America Backs Down From Debit Card Fees

Bank of America spokesman Bill M. Tweed released a statement to the financial media this morning outlining the reversal of the recent bank policy of instituting a monthly fee of $5.00 to customers using debit cards. "Our customers have shared thei...

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£1bn Upgrade For British Army's Generals

Funny story: £1bn Upgrade For British Army's Generals

In a week when the government has announced a £1bn upgrade of the Army's fleet of Warrior armoured vehicles, it has also revealed that the Army is to spend a similar amount upgrading its senior officers. Defence Secretary, Phillip Hammond explaine...

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Global financial crisis a 'banking error'

President of the International Monetary Fund Patsy Laggard has admitted that the Global Financial Crisis is a banking error. Speaking from her Washington DC office Ms Laggard explained: "Mai oui, but yes, we are vereee soreee, we made a beeg...

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USA Unfurls New Flag

Funny story: USA Unfurls New Flag

The new National Flag of the United States was unveiled to a packed audience of international journalists during a press conference at the White House in Washington today. The new flag is the result of a 24 million dollar, five year study by an al...

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Financial Meltdown in Prospect as Panic Takes Hold

Funny story: Financial Meltdown in Prospect as Panic Takes Hold

In the face of global panic, stock market analysts today warned of further problems to come. "This is no doubt a serious situation," warned fiscal analyst Hernst Sprank, of Deutsch Bank Der Bolloks "for sure, there has been a 62.3% rise in the mea...

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Biggest Ever Disaster Movie On The Way

Funny story: Biggest Ever Disaster Movie On The Way

Warner Brothers U.K. have announced to the world that the biggest ever disaster movie is due to hit the big screens later this year. The publicity material released by Warner Brothers makes exciting reading : You screamed at 'Last Day' in 1999 You thrilled at 'The Day After Tomorrow' in 2004 You were terrified by 'Meltdown: Days of Destruction' in 2006 But you ain't seen...

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Trump's Brown People

Trump warns that the brown people are coming. That’s not as bad as the orange person.
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