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Local schools discover an epidemic of benign spots

Funny story: Local schools discover an epidemic of benign spots

It all started in a local elementary school. The teachers noticed that several students were covered with spots. Debbie Westmoreland of Springfield Elementary said, "All I know was that at least four of my girls were covered with spots." The stud...

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Bumper Stickers Annonymous

Funny story: Bumper Stickers Annonymous

You're driving down the road and suddenly you find yourself behind a vehicle covered completely in bumper stickers. What do you do? This is exactly the question local officials are asking in the latest crackdown for road safety.

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'Get well' cards speeding the spread of Ebola, CDC warns

Funny story: 'Get well' cards speeding the spread of Ebola, CDC warns

Washington - A new study by the Centers for Disease Control has found that the common "get well" card is the leading carrier of the deadly Ebola virus. The government health agency has issued emergency usage guidelines in response. "Your typical g...

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Scientists in Ebola Virus Questionnaire Doesn't Go Far Enough Claim

Outraged medics have slammed Government claims to be screening new arrivals to the United Kingdom for Ebola Virus with seemingly pointless questionnaires about their grooming habits. The controversial form is being issued by Customs and Excise staff...

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George Osborne Diagnosed With Night of the Living Dead Syndrome

Stunned PM David Cameron has denied prior knowledge that side kick George Osborne is a long term victim of Night of the Living Dead Syndrome In an emotional press conference held this afternoon, the PM rushed to calm fears that the zombie Chancellor...

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Out Of Control Leprosy Epidemic Sweeps Through Goole

Funny story: Out Of Control Leprosy Epidemic Sweeps Through Goole

Pressure on the Oxford English Dictionary Editors and Wikipedia to describe "epidemic" as an isolated single case is mounting. Tabloids and online news agencies have long been complaining that the E word increases newspaper sales and Web hits and...

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U.S. Epidemic of Restaurants Living Up To Their Name

Funny story: U.S. Epidemic of Restaurants Living Up To Their Name

People all over the country are exercising caution before selecting a destination for an evenings dinner after a man's heart attack at The Heart Attack Grill starts a pandemic of restaurants living up to their names. Reports from all over the countr...

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Boredom is Communicable according to a new Study

Funny story: Boredom is Communicable according to a new Study

The boredom epidemic that has been sweeping South Wales has reached Cumbria. "Obviously, the epidemic has made significant progress in a very short time," said Doctor Fantastico, who has been tasked with finding the cause of the epidemic and stopp...

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Agoraphobia Set To Become An Epidemic

Experts predict that by the year 2099, eighty percent of the UK's population will suffer from agoraphobia. By then most shopping will be done on line and with unemployment forecast at 90 percent, people will have no reason to leave the house, resu...

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German illness epidemic spreads across Europe

Funny story: German illness epidemic spreads across Europe

The vomiting, diarrhoea and (in rare cases) death epidemic that spread rapidly across Germany has been seen in countries as far away as Austria and France, with unconfirmed reports coming out of Belgium and Holland. Scientists are still baffled as...

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Secondary School Biology Experiment Leads to New Pathogen

Funny story: Secondary School Biology Experiment Leads to New Pathogen

COVENTRY, W. MIDS., ENG. - A local secondary school has caused the entire Coventry city area to be put on lockdown after a new mutation has caused a harmless bacteria to morph into a pathogen. The pathogen classified as X/11-G, after the room (X)...

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WHO Warns of Possible Asian Gerbil Flu Epidemic

Funny story: WHO Warns of Possible Asian Gerbil Flu Epidemic

The World Health Organization (WHO)has issued warnings to every major country's health departments regarding the spread of the deadly Asian gerbil flu. Two cases of the flu have already been confirmed, one just outside of Phuket, Thailand and one jus...

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Millions go down with flu. Shopkeeper arrested

With millions of people in the UK falling ill with flu or stomach bugs, a Birmingham corner shopkeeper whose grandfather came from Pakistan has been arrested and charged with releasing germs into the atmosphere in the name of Allah. Zaffar Ali Kha...

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Hand sanitizers spread flu, typhus, HIV: health officials horrified

Funny story: Hand sanitizers spread flu, typhus, HIV: health officials horrified

Public health authorities around the world are warning the public not to use 'hand sanitizer' lotions which advertise protection from illness. 'It's bad enough that hand sanitizers offer people a false sense of security', said Bertram Beecham of t...

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Swine Flu to Infect 9 Billion

Funny story: Swine Flu to Infect 9 Billion

Washington, DC - Epidemiologists working for the CDC have predicted that over 9 billion people will be infected this year alone by the H1N1 virus. Using computer models and sophisticated prediction methods, researchers have concluded that the number...

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On the verge of epidemic

Funny story: On the verge of epidemic

Warm, moist environments have forever attracted fungal growth, and modern households often provide the perfect environments for a variety of unwanted flora. Many fungal infections that afflict humans are prevented by good bacteria that naturally l...

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Great Tylenol Epidemic Of 1982

Funny story: Great Tylenol Epidemic Of 1982

Federal agents taking a second look at the murders of seven people who swallowed tainted Tylenol capsules in 1982 have searched the home of a one-time leading suspect in the still-unsolved case. "I was reading back through the files", stated Lt. D...

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South East Election Epidemic

Funny story: South East Election Epidemic

In a leaked memo it has been revealed how the Labour Party intend to win the next election. The South East of England is currently a Tory stronghold, and could well sway the outcome of the next general election in the Conservative Party's favour.

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