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Funny satire stories about contract

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Funny story: Sky customer takes 96 hours and fails to cancel contract

Sky customer takes 96 hours and fails to cancel contract

A customer who spent 96 hours online trying to end his contract with Sky TV is now suffering from mental exhaustion. Digbert Dongle, 46, from Ventor on the Isle of Wight logged onto the Sky online chat service, thinking that he would be able to ca...

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Funny story: Wireless Carriers Want to Add "Mauled By Rabid Raccoon" to Terms of Breaking Contract

Wireless Carriers Want to Add "Mauled By Rabid Raccoon" to Terms of Breaking Contract

Washington D.C. - A conglomeration of the country's six largest wireless carriers are lobbying the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) to allow them to add "Mauled by rabid raccoon" to the consequences to a consumer of breaking the contract they...

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Funny story: Detroit Tigers First Baseman Miguel Cabrera Gets A Contract Extension Worth $292 Million!

Detroit Tigers First Baseman Miguel Cabrera Gets A Contract Extension Worth $292 Million!

DETROIT - Detroit Tigers slugger Miguel Cabrera was all smiles as he had just learned that the Tigers had agreed to give him a contract extension. Detroit General Manager Dave "Moneybags" Dombrowski informed the sports media that the 30-year-old f...

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Funny story: Shaquille O'Neal Turns Down An Offer To Return To The Los Angeles Lakers

Shaquille O'Neal Turns Down An Offer To Return To The Los Angeles Lakers

LOS ANGELES - Former Los Angeles Laker Shaquille O'Neal was in Tinsel Town on some business. He was asked by Sports Territory Magazine's Tango Brisket about the rumor that the Laker ownership has asked him to sign a one-year contract. O'Neal, who...

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Funny story: Hamilton Driving on Wrong Team - Braun Happy

Hamilton Driving on Wrong Team - Braun Happy

Formula One driver Lewis Hamilton has been caught in a mix-up that means his dream of driving for Mercedes has been dashed to pieces. In a million to one chance, he has mistakenly signed a contract that means he will be delivering Braun shavers in...

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Funny story: The NFL Refs Are Back!

The NFL Refs Are Back!

CHICAGO - After three weeks of fans having to listen to team owners, coaches, players, cheerleaders, and even hot dog vendors whine like a bunch of day care kiddoes about the replacement referees, the 'real' zebras are returning to the gridiron. N...

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Funny story: Peyton Manning's Top Ten Little-Known Demands Added To His Denver Contract!

Peyton Manning's Top Ten Little-Known Demands Added To His Denver Contract!

10. Beeper in helmet that tells me defensive guy close behind me 9. Instead of a solid gold chain around his neck, he demanded a gold bolt through his neck. 8. Hold off all Tickle-Thons in the locker room, after a victory, until I leave. 7. No more towel-snapping in the locker room. Somebody's going to lose an eye! 6. No more "If that had been Eli" comments. 5. Center must...

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Funny story: Peyton Manning Signing With Tennessee Titans

Peyton Manning Signing With Tennessee Titans

A funny thing happened on the way to Miami. Peyton Manning, released by the Indianapolis Colts, didn't show up. Manning was supposed to be in Miami early this week but has yet to show and is in Nashville, Tennessee. So what's up? Has Manning pl...

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Funny story: The Simpsons and other reality characters hold out, settle for compromise

The Simpsons and other reality characters hold out, settle for compromise

SPRINGFIELD--Twentieth Century Fox Television and the Simpson family and a few other key figures finally settled a salary dispute that had threatened to end the longest-running reality TV show, The Simpsons, after 23 seasons. Led by father Homer,...

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Funny story: Lennon Delighted With 3 Year Contract

Lennon Delighted With 3 Year Contract

Glasgow Celtic have rewarded manager Neil Lennon with a 3 year deal after the club won its first trophy in 2 years by beating Motherwell 3-0 in the Scottish Cup Final. Chief Executive Peter Lawwell announced the news this morning before the Scotti...

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Funny story: Dallas Cowboys Select Pippa Middleton In NFL Draft To Be On Cheerleading Squad

Dallas Cowboys Select Pippa Middleton In NFL Draft To Be On Cheerleading Squad

With the ninth pick in the eight round of the NFL draft, the *Dallas Cowboys* selected Pippa Middleton. She was not chosen to be a tight end or a punter or a cornerback. In fact, she had not even played NCAA football or even opted in to the draft.

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Funny story: Fedorov Forgives Red Wing Fans, Seeks Return for 2011-12 Season

Fedorov Forgives Red Wing Fans, Seeks Return for 2011-12 Season

Riding his best personal milestone with the game winning goal in the 2009 Stanley Cup Playoffs, Sergei Federov left the Washington Caps and took a $9 Million a year deal back in Russia. Now with his 2-year deal at an end, Fedorov seeks a return to h...

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Funny story: The NFL Players Association and The NFL Owners Have Just Named Ines Sainz As Having "The Best Looking Butt In The USA"

The NFL Players Association and The NFL Owners Have Just Named Ines Sainz As Having "The Best Looking Butt In The USA"

WASHINGTON, D.C. - The National Football Players Association and the NFL owners met in the "Capital City" to discuss the upcoming contract talks. The current NFL contract expires in March. If a settlement is not reached soon, the owners could impl...

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Funny story: Howard Stern Pulls an Orson Welles

Howard Stern Pulls an Orson Welles

On his radio broadcast yesterday, Howard Stern, announced he was into SiriusXM for another 5 year term. His staff blew out a collective sigh of relief at the news. It had been a highly publicized negotiation with swirling rumors running rampant acros...

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Funny story: Oracle & SAP; Taking the Blood Oath

Oracle & SAP; Taking the Blood Oath

If you happen to be a mid to large sized corporation still alive in the world economy these days, you probably own one of these two business software leviathans. And all it took, aside from a healthy annual maintenance payment, was a near life long...

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Funny story: CNN announces, "We are looking Ms. America as News Reader".

CNN announces, "We are looking Ms. America as News Reader".

Mr. Turner here in Atlanta announced today "we are looking for a proposal to be prepared for Ms. America inviting her into a contract to join CNN as News Reader".

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Funny story: Orlando Bloom Naked, Paris Hilton Naked Mum As USDA OKs Gene-Spliced Rice: Condi Holds Patent For Mass Production of Cyborg Alter Egos

Orlando Bloom Naked, Paris Hilton Naked Mum As USDA OKs Gene-Spliced Rice: Condi Holds Patent For Mass Production of Cyborg Alter Egos

WASHINGTON -- The Department of Agriculture yesterday proclaimed safe for mass production and civilian use an experimental "cyborg approximation" of Secretary of State Condoleeza Rice.

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