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Funny satire stories about bacteria

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Scientists find 'proof' of 15 million years of non evolution!

Funny story: Scientists find 'proof' of 15 million years of non evolution!

Russian scientists have drilled through layers of antarctic ice and taken samples from a lake believed to be - by them - 15 million years old. On analysis, these new lifeforms remain as bacteria, rather than growing limbs, heads, breasts, eyes, no...

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Britney Spears won't eat Pork

Funny story: Britney Spears won't eat Pork

Britney Spears panicked when she saw her six foot body guard pass out at her dinner table after he ate homemade pork chops prepared by Spears. Britney Spears was not affected because she was eating Salmon fish at the time. Doctors at the hospi...

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Food crisis solved by flesh eating bacteria

Funny story: Food crisis solved by flesh eating bacteria

Many people in Britain live below the poverty line and struggle to get enough food to eat. As a result, rickets is making a comeback, as are nutritional disorders that Britain thought it had left in the middle ages. "It's getting so bad," said nut...

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Flesh-eating bacteria strain eats only excess body fat

Funny story: Flesh-eating bacteria strain eats only excess body fat

Allentown, PA - Everyone knows Allentown is full of people who are too fat to fit into a restaurant booth. That is all about to change since the FDA approved the use of a new strain of flesh-eating bacteria for release into the wild, according to ou...

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Swimmers in Gulf of Mexico Warned not to Fart

Funny story: Swimmers in Gulf of Mexico Warned not to Fart

St Petersburg, Florida officials have warned swimmers and surfers there not to wear any oil on their bodies nor fart while in the water. "Those oil-eating bacteria have now devoured the spilled methane and are getting very very hungry", stated one...

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Plan to Test Drive an iPad? Fasten Your Seatbelt!

Funny story: Plan to Test Drive an iPad? Fasten Your Seatbelt!

Folks who came to two Apple stores in New York City to find out what was on the iPad got their answer this week. Reps from a local newspaper had swabbed some demo iPads (a total of four, two from each of two NYC stores), then sent the swabs to...

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Friendly nose bacteria shoots down MRSA

Professor Takayuki Iwase of University Japan announced a highly innovative cure for the dreaded MRSA. Apparently some of the lucky ones amongst us have friendly bacteria in our noses which kicks MRSA butt. "What we can do is isolate these bacteria...

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Scientists develop a 'smell map' for the human body

Funny story: Scientists develop a 'smell map' for the human body

DENVER, Co -Scientists have developed a map of the smell emanating from different regions of the human body, according to my source, Dr. Sten Chisbad, of Boulder. Some of the smells help keep us healthy by playing a key role in social functions, s...

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On the verge of epidemic

Funny story: On the verge of epidemic

Warm, moist environments have forever attracted fungal growth, and modern households often provide the perfect environments for a variety of unwanted flora. Many fungal infections that afflict humans are prevented by good bacteria that naturally l...

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New Bacteria Found

Funny story: New Bacteria Found

In a recent oil drilling expedition, a new species of bacteria has been found. Called Morbus Iuro by scientists, this specimen measures about 2.2 micrometres in length. On closer examination under a microscope, it appears these cellular protists a...

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Bacteria Attack Executives

Funny story: Bacteria Attack Executives

FORT KMOCKS, KY - UDDATE 1 - Scientists discovered bacteria that are solely attacking executives of large corporations. Strangely, these bacteria select those who have already quit their job, who worked for companies which have lead to losing bi...

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Trump to Continue Dictator Tour

There are still a few dictators in the world that Trump hasn't groveled to.
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