NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – A Federal judge has ruled that Siri has been violating the privacy rights of private citizens and now, her owners (Apple Inc.) will have to pay a fine. Judge Fawn Gettasax, 57, stated that Siri has stepped way past…
MANHATTAN – Michael Cohen, the attorney that Donald J. Trump called his “Fixer,” has just been released from the Otisville Correctional Facility. Cohen, aka #2190562, was released early, and many are saying that it is because POTUS was scared as h...
MADRID, New York – President Trump’s former attorney and well-documented ‘fixer,’ recently said that he is going stir-crazy sitting in his tiny prison cell at New York state's infamous Sang Sung Prison. Michael Cohen (aka #7803219) is so desperate...
NEWARK, New Jersey – Newark police have just announced that they have received a very unusual ransom note from an individual who has kidnapped the 24-year-old daughter of well-known Newark attorney, V.K. Fillatingo. Lt. Rusty Keyweather, with the...
WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Trump’s chief lawyer, Segundo Juarez, has just issued a stop-and-desist letter against the mainstream media, because they are putting out television ads that, although are true and totally accurate, are upsetting his clie...
MADRID, New York – The man who was Donald Trump’s personal attorney and so called “Fixer” for ten years, has just commented that he is ready to sing like Celine Dion. Michael Cohen said that he has had a lot of time to think, as he sat in his tiny...
Abigail Smithers of Washington County, Arkansas apparently will recover from several broken ribs, broken right leg, three toes on the right foot and a fresh-laid dog turd tangled up in her hair after falling off a chicken truck headed for a Purdue Fa...
After reading a story about a woman in Ohio changing her name to Sexy, Maude Fuller of Kingsport, Tennessee has legally changed her name to Sextra Babe. An attorney she hired says that there is nothing wrong in changing your name. "Most women do i...
Since spies and vampires seem to be the hot items these days, now we seem to be getting them both in a Hollywood Lawsuit launched by an attorney for actress Nina Dobrev. According to her lawyer, like others in Hollywood, she went to an unnamed doc...
HACIENDA HEIGHTS, California - Amanda Bynes was asked by Ling Chow Rangoon with iRumors about the recent incident in Marina Del Rey where she was throw out of The Vicious Guppy Seafood Diner. The troubled Nickelodeon actress replied that apparentl...
NEW YORK CITY - Gisele Bundchen, who is better known as New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady's highly vociferous wife, was in the Big Apple shopping for underwear. She was asked about the report that she is considering suing the producers of...
NEW YORK CITY - Nicole Polizzi, better known as Snooki, is reportedly quite upset with Christina Aguilera of The Voice. Polizzi, who just three months ago gave birth to a baby boy who she named Lorenzo Dominion Fettuccine LaValle, talked with Faji...
VENICE BEACH - Noted California attorney Ginger Allred, cousin of famed attorney Gloria Allred, has just stated that three more men have stepped forward and are alleging that actor-pilot John Travolta groped them. Ginger Allred, spoke with Fajita...
LOS ANGELES - Manny "Pac-Man" Pacquiao, who has held boxing titles in eight different boxing weight divisions has just stuck his gloved hand in his mouth. Pacquiao, a 33-year-old Filipino, in an interview with Tango Brisket of Sports Territory Mag...
NEW ORLEANS - Russell Brand, the soon-to-be-ex-hubby of Katy Perry, seems to manage to find a way to stay on the front page. Margarita Mixx with The Tinsel Town Times Tribune reports that the 36-year-old Englishman was arrested and charged with to...
LOS ANGELES - Georgetown University coed Sandra Fluke has just secured the legal services of one of the country's top attorneys, Ginger Allred, cousin of the widely known Gloria Allred. Miss Fluke stated that Miss Allred agreed to take her case on...
LOS ANGELES - Lindsay Lohan showed up for her court hearing with her long flowing blonde mane and accompanied by her attorney Shawn "Buddy" Holley. Ms. Holley told the assembled news media that Miss Lohan would not be answering any questions due to the fact that she has been known to say things that have been taken wrong and ended up painting a picture of her that is just not realistic. "Lin...
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