Senator James Sensenbrenner, a long-time senator from Wisconsin and an outspoken denier of global warming, was eaten by a polar bear on Wednesday morning when he went out to pick up his morning newspaper. The polar bear, named Syler, was sitting a...
Representatives of Arctic states have met in Greenland to discuss how bloody cold it always is. Ministers from Finland, Russia, Greenland, Iceland, Canada, Denmark, Sweden and Norway talked for 3 days along with indigenous inhabitants of the regio...
Crawford, TX -- The fight for a more eco-friendly society may have just snared an unlikely champion. Former U.S. president, George W. Bush, during a press conference at his ranch yesterday afternoon promised to return the North Pole ice cap to its fo...
A huge glacier has disappeared without trace in northern Norway. "It was there last autumn" explained Norwegian geologist Lööf Lîrpa, calling from his log cabin inside the Arctic circle. "It's dark all day here in the winter, and we were all t...
CLIMATE SCIENTISTS stationed at remote outposts in Western Canada and in Norway are reporting "dangerous and consistent daytime warming" in the range of 8 to 10 degrees higher than normal announced Professor Cretino Grasso, Director of the CRU (Clima...
Polar bears nation wide are said to be "angry & upset" with Greenpeace and there latest antics. As large chunks of ice find there way down from the Arctic Ocean, the polar bears home is slowly eroding away. Greenpeace have of lately been send...
Ice Floe #7, Nunavut - President Obama recently noticed that there was a new quasi-nation just north of Canada. Calling in his advisors, he learned that Nunavut got it's start by Canada's continued desire to be just like the United States. Canada...
French president Nicolas Sarkozy has scoffed at the announcement by a University of Cambridge professor that the Arctic Ocean will soon - within a decade - be ice-free in the months of summer. Monsieur Sarkozy, addressing the French Academy of Sci...
Washington DC: It was a slow news day in the capital, hence the newspaper headline "Greenland Icecap Melting." Never mind that the oceans have not risen substantially over the years! A few years earlier in response to a similar headline, Professor...
Frank Miller put's himself in the thick of the escalating conflict; the battle for the Arctic's soul. UN and Global Policy At the end of their 3 day stop in the Arctic, (see the Spoof News article "UN arrives at Arctic on day 12 of sellout world tour") global rock stars UN and their charismatic lead singer Ban Ki-Moon have proved again that world class celebrities can change government policy.
Global rock superstars UN arrived in the Arctic on the current leg of their World Climate tour and already frontman Ban Ki-Moon has created controvosy at a news conference. "The cold here is screwing with my voice! If there's one thing global wa...
KOTZEBUE, AK - Sarah Palin, governor of America's last frontier, spoke to a cheering crowd of 300 in a remote Alaskan village 30 miles North of the Arctic Circle today, finally addressing speculation concerning her seemingly inexplicable decision to...
The Ice Bridge which holds the Antarctic Ice Shelf in place has shattered and the frozen southernmost continent is drifting north. Already moving up the Atlantic coast of South America, emperor penguins are shedding their coats and making reservation...
In recent years, the talk of the ice caps melting has been a source of great debate. Many have held that the Greenland ice sheets alone could raise sea level by more then three meters. Those fears were proven to be unfounded today, as the Greenland i...
Finnish explorer, Jan Waslosten, was lost in the frozen Arctic tundra for more than 40 days while rescue teams from Finland and Norway partnered in the search. It was assumed that Waslosten's homing beacon had died out sometime during the first wee...
In this tumultuous economic climate, some are seizing on the eternal value of gold, while Russia seizes on the eternal region of cold - the Arctic. Yes, laughing at foolish westerners archaically clutching gold to stabilize their future, Russia is...
Scientists reported yesterday that the low point for Arctic sea ice in 2008 was 9% larger than in 2007. Global warming advocate Walt Meier expressed deep concern to the Walsh Strait Journal (WSJ), stating: "Even though the sea ice didn't retreat this...
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