In an unexpected development, the UK Layabout Party declared that it will do its upmost to eradicate the scourge of AntiJeremysm that is sweeping the party. From now on, it will be a capital offence, er, sorry, a CAPITAL OFFENCE, to describe Comra...
Angry chants of the Great Rising from the Peasants' Revolt of the 14th century rang through Westminster yesterday as modern serfs (well-heeled activists brandishing coffee-to-go beakers and Pret à Manger turkey sandwiches) advanced on the capital to...
Buckingham Palace Word has filtered out that the whole Royal Family will fete the Queen for her remarkable fortitude and restraint during the Trump visit. She was the only member of the Royals in sight during the Trump visit. The whole Royal Famil...
As the UK Labour Party goes not just to hell in a handcart, but also to places that the Starship USS Enterprise never even dreamed of going to, Jeremy Corbyn, the leader of the Labour Party today showed his gentler side by releasing details of the "T...
May we join the overwhelming response from Tatton's constituents to congratulate George Osborne on the announcement of his new job as editor of the London Evening Standard newspaper. He's had a passion for journalism for a long time and who wants to...
I'm going to go to the polling station and choose the least despicable of x number cynical warmongers who are bombing people in other countries in the name of their own moral charisma and divine mission, destabilising entire regions purely in the name of their petty self-interest, and deliberately and maliciously placing the wellbeing lives of UK citizens at risk... But you don't go to the pol...
Conservative leader David Cameron announced in a press conference on Saturday at number 10 that his introduction of several new female ministers was done with the sole intention of getting former minister for schools Michael Gove laid. Addressing...
David Cameron's introduction of numerous women ministers into the cabinet led to long discussions into the night. "The male ministers were ready to just watch some TV and go home but many of the female ministers were worried about problems the cabin...
Claims that there has been a secret truth ring in Westminster has been made by backbench Conservative MP Beamish Bounderby. In an interview with the Guardian, he has claimed that a secret cabal of politicians has been telling the truth for decades, a...
Pete Wishart revealed today that he is now Alex Salmond's 'hauners' and that he had set up a fight between the First Minister and the Conservative leader, David Cameron. The Perth and North Perthshire MP made the claim following a series of secret me...
Her Majesty the Queen's speech to parliament today has achieved the impossible - all members of the House who were in attendance remained awake. Her Royal Majesty opened her speech with a plea to Wrigley's, the chewing gum manufacturer, not to lay...
A top Government minister popped his head over the battlements of castle parliament today and shouted: "The Government should be allowed to waste taxpayers money!" He quickly jerked his head back inside before any of the plebs could throw stone...
A well-spoken and well-preserved grandmother, Mrs Elizabeth Windsor, made a speech earlier this week in which she suggested that her colleagues, or, as she prefers to call them, "subjects" should cut back on the excesses of modern living and save for...
An unseemly diplomatic row is festering between the Scottish Parliament and Whitehall following comments by the SNP energy minister concerning decommissioned oil rigs. Fergus Ewing told the Commons Energy Committee that Westminster should pick up...
Westminster, LONDON: For years, Oliver Letwin, the Conservative MP has been hiding a secret. Many have known about it, but have not been able to disclose the details. Some have tried, but these details have been binned in public parks all over Lon...
The Dungeon Theatre, West Ham, London: Lady Labour Whip Lyn Brown, West Ham's Dominatrix 'infamous' rant at the Houses of Parliament; "For F***'s sake, move out of my F****** way." "You are such a rude F****** man, you just walked right in front of me." "I am not giving it to you, F*** off." "You just do that and see what happens." "You are harassing me, leave me alone." Lady Do...
The Royal Family, David Cameron, The people of the quintessentially English and Berkshire village Bucklebury, and that mental bloke who camped out for days on the pavement outside Westminster Abbey last week, have all been left reeling today followin...
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