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Funny satire stories about Vegan

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Funny story: Nashville Man Rallies After Disappointing Trip to Grocery Store

Nashville Man Rallies After Disappointing Trip to Grocery Store

Geared up to stock up on wholesome foods and fulfill his New Year’s intention of caring for his body in the way that it deserves, Nate Rudowski of Nashville, Tennessee, popped into his local Kroger grocery store, only to have a disappointing food-sho...

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Funny story: Golden Globe Goers Complain Vegan Opera Cake a Little Dry

Golden Globe Goers Complain Vegan Opera Cake a Little Dry

At the 77th Golden Globes awards dinner, guests enjoyed an entirely plant-based feast which included chilled golden beet soup, wild mushroom risotto, and roasted Brussels sprouts, but some attendees reportedly found the dessert, a vegan "opera cake,"...

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Funny story: Desperate FDA Encourages Americans to Get Comfortable in Their Bodies Just as They Are

Desperate FDA Encourages Americans to Get Comfortable in Their Bodies Just as They Are

"Times have changed, and we need to change with them," was the New Year's message offered by Food and Drug Administration Commissioner Dr. Stephen Hahn, who urged Americans to abandon unrealistic expectations about living in a trim, fit body. "We nee...

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Funny story: Chick-fil-A Admits "Eat Mor Chikin" Ad Written by Semi-Literate Employee, Not Cow

Chick-fil-A Admits "Eat Mor Chikin" Ad Written by Semi-Literate Employee, Not Cow

Restaurant chain Chick-fil-A recently admitted that its popular misspelled advertisement playing off the idea that cows want people to eat more chicken so that they, in turn, will not be eaten, was written not by a cow, as the ad implies, but by a se...

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Funny story: Farmer Finds Pasture-Raised Pork Chops Do Not Do Well in Direct Sunlight

Farmer Finds Pasture-Raised Pork Chops Do Not Do Well in Direct Sunlight

Montana farmer Kevin Johannesen, who prides himself on his ethically-sourced meat, has found that his free-range, pasture-raised pork chops do not do well in direct sunlight. "We thought that the direct light would  be good for boosting vitamin D...

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Funny story: Nashville Man Decides to Cut Himself Some Slack

Nashville Man Decides to Cut Himself Some Slack

"I don't tend to try very hard at things, so I never thought I could be a perfectionist," said Dave Bagwell of Nashville, Tennessee. "But I realized I had it backwards - my standards were so ridiculously high that I didn't think there was even any po...

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Funny story: Joe Rogan Secretly Yearns to Go Vegan but Fears Alienating Fans

Joe Rogan Secretly Yearns to Go Vegan but Fears Alienating Fans

Sources report that comic and podcast show host Joe Ragan, known for his protein-pounding, bow-hunting ways, secretly yearns to go vegan, but fears alienating his meathead fans. "It's not just a marketing thing," said one inside source. "He's gen...

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Funny story: Charleston Man Urges Reinstatement of Slavery for Canines

Charleston Man Urges Reinstatement of Slavery for Canines

Speaking out against the - in his view - overly sentimental pet-parent culture that's pervaded much of the United States, Brett Gallatin of Charleston, South Carolina, is advocating for the reinstatement of slavery for domestic canines. "I'm not a...

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Funny story: Nashville Man Looks Himself in Mirror and Loses Face

Nashville Man Looks Himself in Mirror and Loses Face

After ingesting a plate of overcooked veal parmesan at a corporate dinner event in a dimlit downtown steakhouse, Joshua Hicks of Nashville, Tennessee, glanced up at the mirrored wall to make sure he didn't have any tomato sauce on his white shirt, on...

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Funny story: "Surprise Meat" Latest in Healthier Animal Products Market

"Surprise Meat" Latest in Healthier Animal Products Market

Recognizing that cows, chickens, pigs, and other farmed animals are flooded with stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline in the moments of anticipation prior to their brutal slaughterhouse death, making their flesh that much unhealthier for huma...

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Funny story: In Nod to Animal Rights, Tyson Grants Employed Birds Free Lifetime Housing and Healthcare

In Nod to Animal Rights, Tyson Grants Employed Birds Free Lifetime Housing and Healthcare

In a groundbreaking nod to animal rights, poultry producer, Tyson Foods, agreed to guarantee free lifetime room, board, and healthcare, including unlimited hormone treatment and antibiotics, for the millions of birds employed at its chicken and turke...

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Funny story: Raw Food Vegan Admits to Having a Cold

Raw Food Vegan Admits to Having a Cold

"I feel like such a failure," said a hoarse Jeff Hayes of Cambridge, Massachusetts, a raw food vegan who finally came clean that he had come down with a cold. "I've let down the entire raw community. Not to mention broccoli sprouts." When it was...

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Funny story: Vegan Animal Rights Activists Accused of Subverting "Live and Let Live" to Promote Their Own Selfish Agenda

Vegan Animal Rights Activists Accused of Subverting "Live and Let Live" to Promote Their Own Selfish Agenda

Long considered an advisement to allow others to do as they please regardless of consequences, the slogan "live and let live" was recently employed by a group of animal rights activists who exhorted humans to eat only plants and let other animals liv...

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Funny story: PETA Protester Trampled, Eaten by Pigs

PETA Protester Trampled, Eaten by Pigs

Illinois farmer Jake ("Boss") Hogg was out walking his dogs early Monday morning, when he made a startling discovery. "It was awful quiet in the paddock. I couldn't see my hogs anywhere, so I walked the dogs around the perimeter of the fence.

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Funny story: Targeted Ad Reminds One Man How Much He Despises Applebee's but Totally Works on Other Man

Targeted Ad Reminds One Man How Much He Despises Applebee's but Totally Works on Other Man

A targeted online Applebee's ad missed the mark with Mark Jensen of New York City, who was only reminded how much he despises America's bacon-laden suburban fare and the culture it represents, but it totally worked on Chris Regan, also of New York Ci...

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Funny story: "Clean Meat" Offers Potential for Cruelty-Free Eating without Unwanted Health Benefits

"Clean Meat" Offers Potential for Cruelty-Free Eating without Unwanted Health Benefits

If you're like many protein-avid Americans, who've been longing for a cruelty-free way of eating that doesn't come saddled with the myriad health benefits associated with typical vegan diets, cultured or "clean" meat could be just the ticket. "For...

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Funny story: Joe Rogan and Stamps.web Launch Nutrition Correspondence Course

Joe Rogan and Stamps.web Launch Nutrition Correspondence Course

In a joint effort with Stamps.web, a proud sponsor of The Joe Rogan Experience podcast, comedian and podcast host Joe Rogan announced the launch of a new nutrition correspondence course, which will offer participants the chance to take a deep dive in...

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