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Funny satire stories about Unemployment

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Funny story: Jobs For Prince Harry

Jobs For Prince Harry

Short on cash, sixteen toilets to maintain, and The King-father is cutting off son Harry’s allowance, son Harry needs a job. He could quickly work as a Maitre d’ at a restaurant. He appears to be pleasant and friendly, and he could snack on resta…

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Funny story: Expert Says 2021 Could Be Worse Than 2020

Expert Says 2021 Could Be Worse Than 2020

Just four short days into the new year, and a man who reckons he is a bit of an expert on such matters has said that it's entirely possible, by no great stretch of the imagination, that 2021 could eventually, by far, outstrip 2020 in its shitness.

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Funny story: President Trump Has No Shame, As He Plans To Apply For Unemployment Benefits

President Trump Has No Shame, As He Plans To Apply For Unemployment Benefits

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – The Department of Unemployment has just informed the news media, that one Donald John Trump has just submitted a pre-unemployment request to receive unemployment benefits. A representative for the DU, stated that…

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Funny story: Two West Virginia Brothers Can't Afford Covid-19 Masks, So They Make Their Own Out of Two Discarded Watermelons

Two West Virginia Brothers Can't Afford Covid-19 Masks, So They Make Their Own Out of Two Discarded Watermelons

SQUIRREL NUTS, West Virginia – Willie and Billie Peckerpucker say that, due to the Coronapalooza virus, they have not been able to work at their coal mining jobs for three months. Willie said they each get $47 a week unemployment, but, after they…

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Funny story: Nashville Man Has Trouble Distinguishing between Full Circle and Square One

Nashville Man Has Trouble Distinguishing between Full Circle and Square One

After being laid off his day job due to a coronavirus-related moratorium on contract renewals, aspiring professional photographer Jimmy Fogg of Nashville, Tennessee, once again found himself unemployed and at loose ends. In other words, he’d come ful...

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Funny story: With Disneyland Now Closed, Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck, and Snow White Have Joined The Ever-Growing List of The Unemployed

With Disneyland Now Closed, Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck, and Snow White Have Joined The Ever-Growing List of The Unemployed

ANAHEIM, California – Trump’s COVFEFE-19 Flu has now affected the Wonderful World of Disney. The Oxnard Obligatory Observer is reporting that over 85 Disney cartoon characters have been laid off including Jack Be Nimble and Lady Godiva. One Dis...

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Funny story: Many of Nevada’s Prostitutes Are Applying For Unemployment Benefits

Many of Nevada’s Prostitutes Are Applying For Unemployment Benefits

LAS VEGAS – Now that the number one entertainment mecca of the world has come to a total standstill, many Las Vegas employees are having to apply for unemployment benefits. One group of individuals that is really feeling the pinch,is the wild, wic...

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Funny story: Trump Promises Border Wall, Democrats Promise to Remove Wall--Unemployment Permanently Ended

Trump Promises Border Wall, Democrats Promise to Remove Wall--Unemployment Permanently Ended

In a rare moment of bi-partisanship, Republicans and Democrats are united and their new found unity will have major implications for immigration policy and the U.S. labor market. According to Shiv Aalok, White House Minister of Truth, Democrat House...

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Funny story: Unemployed Man Rebrands as Free Spirit

Unemployed Man Rebrands as Free Spirit

To assist his ailing social life, 33-year-old Lewis Largo, a former technical consultant who's struggled to find work since being laid off from financial services giant Ernst & Young almost four years ago, decided to rebrand from "out of work" to...

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Funny story: Sex House Reports Drastic Reduction In Number Of Unemployed

Sex House Reports Drastic Reduction In Number Of Unemployed

There were frowns and awkward sideways glances this week, when it was noticed that a city centre unemployment office had remarkably metamorphisised into something less savoury, it's fair to say. Essex House, the Unemployment Benefit Office on the...

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Funny story: The Secrets of Companies that are Great at Firing

The Secrets of Companies that are Great at Firing

Ineffectual companies always hire large numbers of incompetent employees. One of the oldest corporate lies is that people are the most important of assets. If that were true, companies wouldn't have to assess why their hiring practices fail at rec...

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Funny story: Man Spends His Time Unravelling String

Man Spends His Time Unravelling String

A man has admitted under cross-examination by the Unemployment Office, that he has nothing better to do than unravel string. Maurice Brooke, 56, made the astonishing revelation during a back-to-work interview at the office that has delayed his Uni...

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Funny story: Man Doesn't Understand Why He Can't Find Work

Man Doesn't Understand Why He Can't Find Work

A gifted graduate from medicine school, with many other useful practical skills, cannot comprehend why he has, thus far, been so unsuccessful in the job market. Maris Radszcinszi studied Medicine for four years, and, when an opening didn't immedia...

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Funny story: President Trump Floats Slavery Idea

President Trump Floats Slavery Idea

President Donald Trump has indicated at a meeting with Republican colleagues, that, as a way of solving problems in the employment sector, he "would not totally oppose" the idea of a return to slavery on a limited scale. The news had an earth-shat...

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Funny story: Sex doll brothel laundering jobs boost US employment

Sex doll brothel laundering jobs boost US employment

A new industry has arisen to aid the nation’s unemployed, under-employed, and full-time employed who have only three part-time jobs. At this time, machine laundering in the sex doll brothel movement has not sufficiently developed, and humans are...

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Funny story: Man Got Dole Money And Went Straight To Las Vegas

Man Got Dole Money And Went Straight To Las Vegas

There was little sympathy for one man this week, when it was revealed he had received his dole cheque on Wednesday, and then headed straight for Las Vegas, where he spent the fucking lot! David Arsehole, 23, from Manchester, signed on at the Unemp…

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Funny story: Unemployment Increases by 3.5 Million and What to do?

Unemployment Increases by 3.5 Million and What to do?

This week, President Trump needs to deal with bigger issues than backing out of the Paris Climate Agreement. In early June, over 3.5 million Americans became unemployed. Sources say the government and the media are keeping this issue quiet because it...

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