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Funny satire stories about US immigration policy

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Funny story: VP Pence says Customs Border Patrol over-worked and there could be “a few bad apples”

VP Pence says Customs Border Patrol over-worked and there could be “a few bad apples”

Visiting the border recently, Mr. Pence stressed that the camps are clean and orderly, with every inmate receiving food and medical attention. Standing beside a crowded cage filled with annoyed looking males (and body stench wafting through the ba...

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Funny story: Africanized Killer Bees Feeling Overshadowed by Migrant Caravan

Africanized Killer Bees Feeling Overshadowed by Migrant Caravan

Remember us, assholes? Back before the Migrant Caravan, and the “rapists” and “murderers” swarming your borders (“swarming,” ha!), you numb nuts were afraid of us: Africanized Killer Bees. Remember us, now? Your worst, goddamned nightmare: bees f...

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Funny story: US Embassy In London To Make Its ESTA Online Visa Form Even Tougher!

US Embassy In London To Make Its ESTA Online Visa Form Even Tougher!

Staff at the US Embassy in London have said that, after the confusion surrounding a woman who made 'an error' in completing one of its online visa forms, a major overhaul of the system is being planned. Mandie Stevenson, 29, from Scotland, was com...

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Funny story: Trump Revokes Pilgrim Fathers' Citizenship

Trump Revokes Pilgrim Fathers' Citizenship

In an entirely unexpected executive order today, US President and so-called leader of the free world, Donald J. Trump revoked the US citizenship and confiscated passports from the Pilgrim Fathers and their descendants, thus rendering them stateless.

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Funny story: The ICE Man Cometh

The ICE Man Cometh

Only In America - With all the controversy the Trump administration has created with its new immigration enforcement policies, the little known and greatly underappreciated U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) agency has been thrust into th...

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Funny story: Trump's VP Choice Defends Trump Jr.'s Skittle Remark

Trump's VP Choice Defends Trump Jr.'s Skittle Remark

Donald Trump Jr. is facing intense backlash on social media after he posted a message on Twitter Monday night that compared Syrian refugees to a bowl of Skittles sprinkled with a few that "would kill you." "This image says it all. Let's end the po...

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Funny story: Trump Calls for Four More Walls

Trump Calls for Four More Walls

GOP Presidential Candidate Donald Trump announced today his administration will not rest until the entire nation is protected from productive immigrants. His campaign called a press conference to explain that the candidate recently learned some state...

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Funny story: Trump Proposes Ideological Purity Test

Trump Proposes Ideological Purity Test

Donald Trump has proposed what analysts call an "ideological purity" test for those who would enter the U.S. as immigrants. Trump said in a statement, "In addition to screening out all members or sympathizers of terrorist groups, we must also screen...

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Funny story: President Obama Rushed to Hospital with Chest Pain

President Obama Rushed to Hospital with Chest Pain

President Barack Obama was rushed to the Walter Reed Army Medical Center with reported shortness of breath and chest pain, after being briefed about the results of a study tracking the progress of the first wave of "DREAMers", or those young people e...

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Funny story: "Send A Message" To 9-Year-Olds Says GOP Chief

"Send A Message" To 9-Year-Olds Says GOP Chief

Oversight and Government Reform Chairman Darrell Issa, R-Calif., has sent President Barack Obama a letter calling for an end to the 2012 executive order granting stays of deportation to children brought into the country illegally by their parents whe...

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Funny story: Jürgen Klinsmann Refused Re-entry Into United States

Jürgen Klinsmann Refused Re-entry Into United States

US Soccer coach, German born Jürgen Klinsmann has been denied entry back into the United States after immigration officers held him for 8 hours for questioning before deporting him back to Germany. Klinsmann, 49, who was born in Göppingen, West Ge...

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Funny story: Anti-Immigration Group's Newest Idea: Send the Statue of Liberty Back to France!

Anti-Immigration Group's Newest Idea: Send the Statue of Liberty Back to France!

WASHINGTON, D.C. - FAIR, the Fathers for American Immigration Reform, announced today that they are lobbying Congress to return the Statue of Liberty to France. The Statue of Liberty Enlightening the World was a gift from France and since its dedi...

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Funny story: No ER Care For Children Of Undocumented

No ER Care For Children Of Undocumented

The Republican National Committee today issued the party's "Statement Of Principles" on immigration. Among its points are: 1) We recognize that our brown brothers and sisters are human beings especially genetically endowed to do stoop labor and pluck chickens in huge farm factories. 2) While we support the work of Sheriff Joe Arpaio of Maricopa County, Az, and endorse his concept of a "Te...

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Funny story: Obama Earmarked for Deportation after Election Defeat

Obama Earmarked for Deportation after Election Defeat

Plans are afoot to deport Barack Obama from the US after he is defeated in November's election. It is understood that secret talks between Mitt Romney and immigration officials have already taken place and, once Romney is sworn in a s President and...

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Funny story: Illegal Immigrant is Prison's 1,000,000th Inmate - Wins Car and Citizenship

Illegal Immigrant is Prison's 1,000,000th Inmate - Wins Car and Citizenship

California's Department of Corrections has given away a new Dodge Caravan to a prisoner in Sacramento who became a prisons millionth inmate this weekend. Jose Guillermo, who was arraigned Saturday after being arrested for shoplifting, was delight...

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Funny story: Arizona Offers Immigrants Voluntary Incarceration

Arizona Offers Immigrants Voluntary Incarceration

Arizona has extended a limited-time offer to all immigrants in the state to be voluntarily incarcerated for a 10-year period, following which they would enjoy a six-month exemption from the state requirement that all immigrants over the age of 14 car...

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Funny story: "Get Real Names", Napolitano tells Immigrants

"Get Real Names", Napolitano tells Immigrants

In an effort to streamline US Homeland Security efforts Secretary Janet Napolitano has asked immigrants to "get real names". The move follows a number of cases in which the same individual has appeared at different places bearing different names, or...

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