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Funny satire stories about Time

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Funny story: CDC Warns that Coronavirus May Linger on Petals So Don’t Stop and Smell the Roses

CDC Warns that Coronavirus May Linger on Petals So Don’t Stop and Smell the Roses

Cautioning that the novel coronavirus can linger on surfaces like flower petals for up to 17 hours, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention warned people not to stop and smell the roses, even though they could die at any moment from COVID-19.

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Funny story: Time Taking Longer To Happen During Lockdown

Time Taking Longer To Happen During Lockdown

The well-worn phrase which implies that time moves faster when we are enjoying ourselves, and that it drags when we are not, has been given scientific credibility at last, after countless people rang the BBC to complain that time was now progressing...

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Funny story: Nashville Man Does Wrong Thing In Nick of Time

Nashville Man Does Wrong Thing In Nick of Time

When he learned via Facebook that his toxic, narcissistic ex-girlfriend, Jessica Montbleau, was about to tie the knot with someone else, Colin Carver of Nashville, Tennessee, knew it was time for him to take swift, decisive action in order to salvage...

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Funny story: Nashville Man Tries to Seize the Day but It Slips Away

Nashville Man Tries to Seize the Day but It Slips Away

Unwilling to let life pass him by, Jake Gentry of Nashville, Tennessee, attempted to seize the day, or, at least, capture a moment or two, only to find that they all slipped away. “It’s frustrating,” said Gentry of his failed efforts to hold on to...

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Funny story: Time Gets Totally Wasted - Again

Time Gets Totally Wasted - Again

Despite his best efforts to make better use of himself, Time ended up getting totally wasted - again. "I guess some stuff happened, but I have no clue what," said Time. "I was flying, is about all I can remember. And the seconds got a little slopp...

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Funny story: Don't Forget To Set Your Clocks Back One Hour, Then Ahead One Hour

Don't Forget To Set Your Clocks Back One Hour, Then Ahead One Hour

Daylights Wasting Time is upon us. Tomorrow morning at precisely 2 a.m., set your clocks back to 1 a.m. Then, wait an hour for it to turn 2 a.m. again. This time, set the clock ahead one hour to 3 a.m. And that's it. You're all set. You won't h...

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Funny story: Longest Day Is Good News For Little Pigs

Longest Day Is Good News For Little Pigs

The Longest Day, that annual feast that celebrates having more time to do stuff during daylight than on any of the other 364 days, has arrived once again! Known by people in times gone by as 'the Longest Day', the Longest Day can be as much as 1 m...

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Funny story: Man's Watch Four Minutes Slow

Man's Watch Four Minutes Slow

A teacher in a Science lesson at a school in Bangkok was surprised this morning, when the school bell rang for breaktime, a full four minutes earlier than he had expected it to ring. The incident happened at 8:40am, but the teacher in the classroo...

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Funny story: The Start of June Is The End Of May

The Start of June Is The End Of May

What with all the jostling going on with the Conservative Party leadership contest, as well as the still undecided disaster area that is Brexit in the forefront of people's minds, we thought we'd bring you some light relief from politics. Time is...

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Funny story: Szjlobovjian Parliament Vetoes Daylight Saving Time

Szjlobovjian Parliament Vetoes Daylight Saving Time

While the United States Congress appears to be poised to pass a measure mandating Daylight Saving Time for fifty-one weeks of the year, the tiny East European republic of Szjlobovjia has taken the opposite tack, with its parliament unanimously reject...

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Funny story: Nashville Man’s Mother Drops Ball by Failing to Remind Him about Seasonal Time Change

Nashville Man’s Mother Drops Ball by Failing to Remind Him about Seasonal Time Change

This past weekend, Wanda James, the mother of 32-year-old Tucker James in Nashville, Tennessee, failed to remind Tucker to set his clock an hour ahead as the area returned to regular Central Standard Time, causing him to almost miss a coffee date wit...

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Funny story: Basketball: NBA London Game Was Close Until The Very Last Few Fractions Of A Second

Basketball: NBA London Game Was Close Until The Very Last Few Fractions Of A Second

The NBA London Game between the New York Knicks and the Washington Wizards was as exciting as basketball gets, and the result was always in doubt until the last few fractions of the final second. As everyone knows, basketball is a game where it ca...

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Funny story: 2019 To Be Much The Same As 2018

2019 To Be Much The Same As 2018

The New Year, 2019, is likely to be very much the same as its direct predecessor, 2018, it's been claimed by analysts who have been studying 'the signs'. Contrary to popular belief, goes the claim, one period of time is no more likely to be any be...

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Funny story: Man Puts Clock Forward Instead Of Back!

Man Puts Clock Forward Instead Of Back!

In a case that will leave most readers wondering how anyone could possibly be so stupid, a man has put his clock forward instead of putting it back. Unemployed Dan Crackhouse, 37, took the extraordinary step at 02:00 this morning, changing his clo...

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Funny story: Alarm Clock Stopped At 01:32

Alarm Clock Stopped At 01:32

An alarm clock owner in the Cambodian second-city of Battambang has told of how he awoke late this morning, after his normally-reliable alarm clock failed to wake him up at the normal agreed time. Moys Kenwood, 55, sets his gray-colored Tesco alar...

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Funny story: Oklahoma Man Dies While Attempting to Kill Time

Oklahoma Man Dies While Attempting to Kill Time

Brent Hargrave of Tulsa, Oklahoma, was attempting to kill time at his boring office job when time rallied and, in a valiant show of self-defense, slayed the project manager. “I don't think he even saw it coming,” said Hargrave's former co-worker,...

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Funny story: Biggest 'wasters' of UK time revealed in survey and BOJO tops the list!

Biggest 'wasters' of UK time revealed in survey and BOJO tops the list!

A survey revealing what Brits hate the most about 'time wasters' has come up with some strange, quirky dislikes appearing! So, Jaggedone has analysed the survey and here is the real top 10 of UK 'Wasters of time': 1) King of UK wasters is BOJO,...

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