Jenny Hampton of New York City, a self-described "people-pleaser" who goes to enormous lengths to win people's approval, to her own detriment, says that she wants to tell her arrogant, condescending therapist to fuck off, but is concerned as to what...
Unlike most of his fundamentalist Christian fellows, progressive Christian psychologist Lee Haley of Nashville, Tennessee, doesn’t believe that gay men are doomed to hell or in need of therapeutic “conversion,” but he admitted to secretly judging his...
After years of fending off complaints about his self-centeredness, grandiosity and extreme narcissism, Trent Lockwood of Nashville, Tennessee, finally figured out that any emotional shortcoming on his part was due to the fact that, as a young boy, hi...
When you're paid to hit people on the job you might take that home with you, or in your car, at a bar, in a nightclub, or in a parking lot dispute. NFL players are spoiled, they feel entitled. They believe they're outside the rules and that even i...
A recently leaked National Security Agency recording of a therapy session between President Barack Obama and his personal therapist revealed that Obama, in an effort to achieve mental and emotional balance, has decided to display the Nobel Peace Priz...
1. I don't know why I'm here. 2. How do I know you are not crazier than me? 3. There is no such thing as the unconscious. 4. I'll pay you if I get cured. 5. Who was the crazier between Freud and Jung? 6. I don't want prescribed any drugs. 7. My daddy is a psychotherapist. That's why I'm here. 8. I think politicians should be psychologically tested before they stand for office...
After two children, one dog, and three cars, Raymond Jones (42) of Niagara Falls, NY has filed for divorce from his wife of 12 years Rebecca (37). In the fall of 2013 the eligible (for an upgraded cell phone) Raymond went to his local AT&T sto...
In case you keep in touch with the 23-year-old gorilla, Patrick, formerly of the Dallas Zoo, be advised that you should record a change of address. He's moving to South Carolina. Gail Farrelly, a Science & Technology reporter at TheSpoof.co...
CHICAGO - Dr. Phil recently appeared on The Viagra View and he told Regis Philbin that if ever there was a world-wide leader who needed therapy it is North Korea's Kim Jong Un. Dr. Phil said that the little man is totally obsessed with himself and...
LOS ANGELES - Alec Baldwin has once again showed America and the world that he is 55 going on 15 as he insulted a pizza employee who cut his pizza into eight pieces instead of six. The man has one of the quickest tempers on both sides of the Missi...
Free range chickens have more severe behavioral problems than birds that are subject to strict rules and guidelines, says acclaimed poultry therapist and chicken hypnotist Topaz Corpel-Klotz. "What I'm saying might surprise people, but I see the p...
With the economy in the state that it is in, the rising cost of weddings has become something that many men are deciding against tying the knot. "It costs several thousand quid," said Harry Balls, a mathematics lecturer from Sheffield University,...
MANHATTAN - In a move that has to go down as one of the most unbelievable of the year, Rihanna has just announced that she and her ex-boyfriend Chris Brown will be getting married on January 1, 2013. Brown who used the Barbadian beauty as a punchi...
KEYSTONE, South Dakota - Lindsay Lohan traveled to The Black Hills of South Dakota to visit Mount Rushmore. She had been told by her therapist Dr. Ottoman Buxton of Tarzana, that she really needed to visit Mount Rushmore and take a good look at th...
In the wake of the massively over-hyped and under-specified iPhone 5, Apple Computers have announced that they will provide free therapy for all those consumers that have succumbed and bought one of the new devices. "We're aware of the massive cru...
Therapist clicks on Dictaphone following session. No new people. Joan Rivers kept bringing her daughter and dog, and we had to kick her out. The daughter has mommy issues: not my field. Arsenio Hall got another show, and was so eager to book Bell Biv Devoe that he skipped out the door. "I'm so glad he has to suffer no more," said Ann Curry. "The world was unfair to him." We've got a...
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