In an astonishing response to Sunderland midfielder Darren Gibson slating his city the Mayor of Sunderland has released this statement: "Let me start by saying Darren Gibson is a round chested, no class cunt who would injure himself wiping his ars...
Sunderland midfielder Darren Gibson has confirmed what the rest of the world already knows: that Sunderland are shite. Darren, who himself is quite shite, was caught on camera slagging off everything he could about the team, the city, his neighbou...
Sunderland manager Gus Poyet says "It would be a miracle" if his side were to win the Premiership Title this season and has conceded that barring either a miracle or a mathematical impossibility his side are unlikely to be crowned champions. "I th...
Rumours have circulated over the last week that Professional Wrestling company owner Vince McMahon has been enquiring about the possibility of buying English football team Newcastle United FC. However, the WWE Chairman has made a series of proposals about how to change the game to make it connect more with the professional wrestling audience. 1.) Newcastle United will rename themselves "The...
Sunderland boss Paolo Di Canio has revealed to sources that he urgently needs to sign a right-winger before the transfer window closes. DI Canio joined the mackems on April 1st last season, replacing Martin O'Neill, who left the club to spend more...
The British Coal Corporation has announced that they are to reopen Wearmouth Colliery. In recent years there has been an upturn in the demand for coal. In the wake of an upcoming crisis, experts are advising that the UK needs to become more self-...
The Laing Art Gallery in Newcastle is currently hosting an exhibition of work by 19th century painter of apocalyptic scenes and divine retribution John Martin. The region's football teams must have felt these had been brought to life as they suffe...
Arsenal blew their chance to put real pressure on Manchester Utd at the top of the Premier League when they failed to beat Sunderland at the Emirates. On a day when Gunners' manager Arsene Wenger said he was obsessing about beating Sunderland, his...
Steve Bruce has often wondered if the comments made by his family, friends and colleagues, regarding the possibility that he is, somehow related to American, Late Night Talk Show host, Jay Leno, may indeed be true. There is definitely a marked res...
Chelsea made an early foray into demonstrating the Club's Christmas spirit by walking in a winter blunderland at Stamford Bridge as they cruised to a resounding 3-0 defeat to unfancied Sunderland. The Mackems could hardly believe their luck from t...
There were 22 players on the pitch. And not one of them made an impact. In a game which has always brought plenty of excitement, Blackburn and Sunderland were about as effective as the Germans during trench warfare in World War One: effectively...
In a shocking controversy thought to be caused by a lower league team, the roof of the Manchester United dressing room at the Stadium of Light collapsed completely. The room above, known as the "Local" for local supporters, was currently hosting a...
Liverpool, in an increasingly desperate attempt to revive their flagging season, have signed the beachball whose skilfull deflection was their downfall yesterday. The beachball, who was on loan from the Spanish side Real Costa del Sol, will partne...
Liverpool crisis continues as Rafa's boys minus Stevie G and Torres crash to defeat at Sunderland. Goal scored by Darren Bent, but bizarrely deflected from a balloon/beach ball launched onto the field of play by a Liverpool fan. Ironically. Liv...
Following Her Majesty the Queen's disapproval of a recipient of her coveted MBE award - Steven Gerrard - ending up in police cells, and then in court on charges of assault, the head of state of the United Kingdom and Northern Ireland took further rev...
There was good news for Sunderland fans today after their recent run of poor form has left them teetering just above the Premier League relegation places. Black Cats manager Ricky Sbragia told reporters that the club was close to signing their fir...
Premier League newboys, Hull City, are in crisis this morning after it emerged that football pundit, Mark Lawrenson, had tipped them to win today in his weekly predictions. Lawrenson, once of Liverpool, now of ill-fitting, unfashionable knitwear a...
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