No shit! You think all those “Best Pictures” were the best? A movie about a talking pig was once nominated for Best Picture. Trends lead, otherwise would “Platoon” win Best if were made in a non-Vietnam-loving time? Anybody remember “Birdman or (The…
Ever wonder why The SpongeBob Reality Show got cancelled? One of the creepy attractions of reality television is the glimpses it gives us into the lives of meaningless creatures whose lives we might never get to see otherwise. It's equal parts upl…
Wearing a Donna Karan tube dress of soft pink and diamond jewelry by Harry Winston, Minnie held a press conference in NYC yesterday off a pier at the South Street Seaport in lower Manhattan. She attracted a big crowd and spoke for ten minutes straig...
Befuddled evolutionists are chomping at the bit following the discovery of a something they are calling Godzillus. Engineer Ron Fine found the something whilst digging for fossils, and this one is no tiddler, but nine feet long. Although no-one...
New research has verified what so many people have already known: SpongeBob SquarePants is Public Enemy Number One. The researchers from the Ivy League College of Whatsa Matta U. have found that kids who watch SpongeBob SquarePants end up with...
The humble sponge is one of nature's simple creatures. A hark back to the days when all life could get by without a backbone, eyes, legs, bilateral symmetry or an autonomous sympathetic nervous system. It is under threat from the greatest predator...
David Cameron has become increasingly desperate in finding the right people to join his coalition government - in order to address the issues facing his government. The latest recruit is badly drawn, unrealistic , annoying cartoon character - Bob Spo...
I was thinking about Spongebob Squarepants, and their "bringing balance to Bikini Bottom" prophecy, and general character alignments, and realized that while you can neatly map Spongebob Squarepants and Patrick Star to good and evil (Mr. Squidward's confusion notwithstanding), you can't map them so neatly to order and chaos. Patrick represents a chaotic organization. He thrives on emotional cha...
Patrick Star, the oft-times intellectually challenged but loveable co-star of Nickelodeon's reality show Spongebob Squarepants, has committed himself to rehab after an early morning boating accident which left a teenage co-star critically injured.
The silly cartoon series Spongebob is coming of age with real actors and a real movie plot. This time Spongebob and Patrick aren't goofy bubble chasers they are spies for Bikini Bottom Intelligence (BBI). The movie has an all-star cast; the title...
It hit him like a bolt of lightning. Squidward Tentacles was visited today by someone pounding on his door and this time it wasn't Spongebob. It was instead Ed MacClam from the Publisher's Sweepinghouse Contest and his "Prize People" delievering a gi...
In a surprising announcement, the Nobel committee confirmed that Patrick Starr, the character actor made famous by his role on Spongebob Squarepants, will receive the Nobel prize for literature. Patrick Starr is the Author of the novel "Undersea."...
Buoyed by their decision to re-name the stodgy English pudding known for centuries as 'Spotted D**k' (the name is too offensive to be published in this, or indeed any other, publication), Flintshire County Council has today announced a battery of fur...
Hollywood, California - After spending hours reorganizing his closet, SpongeBob SquarePants finally came out, taking a break for a moment, only to find his friends had prepared a surprise birthday party celebration for him down stairs. "With all...
There is breaking news this morning out of Compton, California where police just arrested Hip Hop Harry, C-Funk, and Sponge Bob Squarepants for the drive-by shooting of Barney, the purple dinosaur loved dearly by millions of children nationwide. W...
While the fall means the return of football season for most Anderson County, North Carolina men, 50-year-old Wildberry resident Timmy Hindson is happy for another reason; the return of his favorite TV Show SpongeBob Squarepants. "Please don't tell...
Spongebob Squarepants denies claim of fathering Miss Piggy's lovechild known as Shrek. "OK, I had a few drinks that night, and Piggy spent the night. Besides, Patrick and Kermit where there the whole time."...
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