Boston's Father Seamus O’Hodge recalls how listening to confessions used to be enjoyable and dangerous, but now they’re as edgy as an Obama confession on Oprah. At a Barnes and Noble book signing, promoting his new autobiography, ‘Sins aren’t what…
The Family Research Council is know to be the most important anti-gay advocacy group in the country. Lesser know is its attitude toward women. It's head, Tony Perkins and many others belong to denominations which bar women from serving as pastors b...
The Pope has declared Original Sin forgiven upon hearing that a woman has menstruated Jesus. The woman in her thirties was routinely about to change her sanitary towel when she saw a face staring up from between her legs. Upon closer inspection the w...
In a victory that was hardly a surprise to pundits who have closely followed the race, Wrath took top honors at this year's Sinnys, awarded to the Deadly Sins each March. "People are really pissed off everywhere," said Daniel Patrick, the event's...
A local man who decided to chow-down on a steak and kidney pie for his lunch last Friday, got a nasty shock when he was struck on the head by a passing Catholic because eating meat on a Friday is a mortal sin. The man, who had bought the pasty fro...
I've thought long and hard about this. Perhaps the Republicans and Tea Partiers are right. Perhaps there is so much trouble in this country because we've gotten away from God. Considering this, I decided to get to the very root of all troubles. You see, what brought the collapse of this God-given country is the same thing that got us thrown out of the Garden of Eden. CLOTHING! After all, i...
Turkey's Religious Affairs Foundation, which is affiliated with the government's Religious Affairs Directorate, has issued their latest handbook to help Turkish people be more religious. The Marriage Handbook advises women that breast enlargement,...
VATICAN CITY - Ever budged in front of someone in a queue for the subway? You just hindered a child of God, sinner! Ever bragged about that homer you drilled at your last softball game? You just spoke boastful words, heathen! Ever stripped naked,...
A new Vatican document, rumored to be composed by online confessor, AskFrFred44giveness, has increased the already quite erect list of sin that Catholics need to become neu-erotic about.
St. Croix River, Milwaukee - Admitting that gluttony was the only one of the seven deadly sins that he enjoyed committing, Mike Martinez, 39, attempted to set his life on the righteous path by confessing to his pastor that he had set out years earlie...
In an effort to revive flagging revenues due to recent bad business investments and poor publicity, the Vatican announced today that the Catholic Church will begin selling indulgences. These "get out of jail free cards" permit the owner to...
Palermo, Italy - (ReUterus): A Sicilian company has unveiled its first edition of The Good Confession Guide which star-rates over 100,000 Catholic priests according to the the size of backhander tariffs they charge in exchange for the most lurid admi...
SEATAC, Washington - Over the past weekend, officials at Seattle-Tacoma International Airport angered God by removing 14 plastic Christmas trees intended to celebrate the birth of His Son, the Lord Jesus Christ. After two day of prayerful reflection...
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