Prime Minister David Cameron has today announced the new members of his cabinet. Out go the old, and in come the, er, old, into jobs they know nothing about, mainly to afford them a substantial increase in salary and pension contributions between now...
When she was growing up, Hillary Clinton was determined to break through traditional barriers to feminine achievement. In other words, Hillary was NEVER going to be just a secretary. However, like many women, Hillary found that traditional feminin...
Press Secretary...
The next Batman movie already promises to be better than the last with the news that Katie Holmes has quit the production.
Earlier today, the White House distributed a press statement to newspapers globally. It was transcribed by secretary Sarah Peters as Bush dictated his world-wide message to her. It reads:...
CADAQUES - John Peter Moore, Salvador Dali's former personal secretary, has died at age 86 after being trapped in a Dali painting for forty-five years, the Cadaques coroner's office reported. The coroner's office confirmed Mr. Moore's identity after...
London, 7 March - (Associated Mess) New twists have emerged today in the latest chapter that is the fiasco of ex-UK Home Secretary David Blunkett's love life, fuelling the controversy that he may have been set up in an elaborate CIA-style MK-UL...
Home Secretary Charles Clarke is planning to use a points system to decide whether asylum seekers should be allowed to remain in the United Kingdom.
An unknown private secretary to the European Commission has leaked details of a hitherto secret study being conducted by the EC Landmass Reassignment Group (ECLRAG) in which it has been confirmed that continental drift - the movement of whole countries or indeed continents which "float" on a sea of molten magma - is continuing apace. The study reflects on the sudden disappearance of Wa...
News of the World's exclusive on David Blunkett's affair with married woman Kimberly Fortier, has come as news to the Home Secretary. "They are alleging that I was on the Island of Corfu with her and her son, but if that is true I'm...
The Secretary General of the UN, Kofi Annan, has been reunited with his long lost Brother, actor and Ukulele magnate Morgan Freeman.
4-7-04 - Donald Rumsfield, Defense Secretary, said today that he is "Mad at himself" for not having learned earlier of American abuses of Iraqi captives despite his having been told of them months earlier by his generals. He also said that he is "Mad at himself" for not having told the President about them until recently although he told the President about them months ago and...
Ministers today shelved plans to downgrade the F-Word to a class B expletive. Under recent plans, the word would have joined Bollocks and Shite in the class-B category. Tim Minge, assistant to the Home secretary explained the dramatic...
Washington---President Bush unveiled his newest addition to the Cabinet this morning, the Secretary of Pimps.
Education Secretary Charles Clarke announced yet another amendment to the bill, designed to appease the remaining, remaining rebels.
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