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Funny satire stories about Russia

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Funny story: Vladimir Putin disguises himself to avoid assassination - grows small moustache, dyes his hair black and places a hydraulic spring under his right armpit

Vladimir Putin disguises himself to avoid assassination - grows small moustache, dyes his hair black and places a hydraulic spring under his right armpit

He’s already got several body doubles and rumour has it that the British SAS are gunning for him. But the Butcher of Kyiv, Vlad, also known as “the Poisoner”, Putin, has resorted to extreme measures to dodge an assassin’s bullet. The one-time winn…

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Funny story: Britain's 707th Regiment Defeated At The Battle of Konotop

Britain's 707th Regiment Defeated At The Battle of Konotop

KONOTOP, Ukraine - (Satire News) - British reporter Tango Brisket with The Twickenham Times-Telegram reports that England's 707th Queen's Elite Infantry Regiment showed itself as being not very elite. Brisket who is embedded with the famed regimen…

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Funny story: The HMS Big Ben, The UK's Largest Aircraft Carrier Has Sustained Damage From Russian Migs

The HMS Big Ben, The UK's Largest Aircraft Carrier Has Sustained Damage From Russian Migs

THE BLACK SEA - (Satire News) - BuzzFuzz (The Ukraine) is reporting that England's biggest naval vessel has been damaged by rocket fire from four Russian migs. The jets hit the "HMS Big Ben." at 2:39 am, when everyone, except for the helmsman was…

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Funny story: Meteorologists Say That A Huge Earthquake Could End The Russian-Ukraine War

Meteorologists Say That A Huge Earthquake Could End The Russian-Ukraine War

GENEVA, Switzerland - (Satire News) - The Metrologists of The World (MTW) held their annual meeting in Geneva, and they concluded that it does not appear that the Russian invaders are going to be withdrawing from the Ukraine anytime soon. But they…

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Funny story: A British Submarine Is Missing In The Black Sea

A British Submarine Is Missing In The Black Sea

THE BLACK SEA IN THE UKRAINE - (World Satire) - Boom Boom News (The Ukraine) has reported that the UK submarine "The HMS Sea Scoundrel" is missing. The Royal British Navy reports that the last transmission from "The Sea Scoundrel" stated that she…

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Funny story: The British Warship The HMS Toot Sweet Is Hit By Several Russian Submarine Torpedoes

The British Warship The HMS Toot Sweet Is Hit By Several Russian Submarine Torpedoes

WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - The Washington, D.C. Globe-Gazette is reporting that a UK warship, The HMS Toot Sweet, has been hit by three Russian submarine torpedoes. The Toot Sweet was so badly damaged that it is limping back to its home po…

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Funny story: M.A.D. About Red, White, Blue

M.A.D. About Red, White, Blue

During the good old days of the Cold War, there was a thing the Americans and Soviet invented called “Mutually-Assured Destruction” or M.A.D. This came about when both side had enough nuclear missiles to blow the frick outa each other, and take the r…

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Funny story: Eddy Snow Stuck in the Freeze

Eddy Snow Stuck in the Freeze

Edward Snowden was given Russian citizenship. Putin is desperate. Putin says: “What is you Americans say? Enemy of my enemy is friend? So Snowden is America’s enemy, so is my friend.” Vlad. First of all, Snowden is hiding for his life in your c…

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Funny story: British Bombers Destroy A Russian Munitions Factory Just Outside of Moscow

British Bombers Destroy A Russian Munitions Factory Just Outside of Moscow

LONDON - (UK Satire) - The BBC is reporting that three British bombers flew deep into Russia and totally destroyed The Nikita Krushchev Munitons Plant, located just 8 miles outside of Moscow. The commander of the bomber squad, Colonel Wilmington R…

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Funny story: Seagal Can’t Fly on the Cruise

Seagal Can’t Fly on the Cruise

Tom Cruise has already signed a deal for the next Mission Impossible movie. Tom is gonna join forces in Ukraine and single-handedly take Russia down. Steven Seagal, Putin’s personal Hollywood bitch, doesn’t like this. He doesn’t like that Cruise i…

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Funny story: British Forces Are Victorious At The Battle of Borova

British Forces Are Victorious At The Battle of Borova

BOROVA, Ukraine - (UK Satire) - The BBC reports that British forces from The 707th Queen's Elite Infantry Regiment defeated a Russian regiment, which quickly retreated toward the Russian-Ukrainian border. The Russian troops were made up of recentl…

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Funny story: The Kremlin Divulges That 91% of All of Russia's Citizens Want Putin To Withdraw From Ukraine

The Kremlin Divulges That 91% of All of Russia's Citizens Want Putin To Withdraw From Ukraine

MOSCOW - ((Satire News) - America's Grandiose News Agency has issued a statement stating that The Kremlin Voice has declared that 91% of all Russian residents are sick of their country getting their ass kicked by Ukraine and her allies. GNA report…

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Funny story: Russian Halloween

Russian Halloween

Hello. Welcome to Russia. Is Halloween. Let us go to first house. Hello, give me. Okay, what we have this house? Bullets. Yes, very good, Russian like to give and receive many bullets for the children. Next house. Hello, give me. Okay, this is…

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Funny story: Ukraine Releases Thousands of Bomb Drone Birds Over Moscow

Ukraine Releases Thousands of Bomb Drone Birds Over Moscow

MOSCOW - (Satire News) - In an effort to stop the invading Russian horde, Ukraine has released thousands and thousands of bomb drone birds all over the Russian capital of Moscow. Ukrainian President Zelenskyy states that the birds are capable of i…

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Funny story: President Putin Says Elections Were Held And The People of Nepal, Turkmenistan, Uzbekistan, and Cambodia Are Now Part of Russia

President Putin Says Elections Were Held And The People of Nepal, Turkmenistan, Uzbekistan, and Cambodia Are Now Part of Russia

MOSCOW - (Satire News) - The Kremlin Voice has written that President Putin now has a brand new title, and that is "Real Estate Agent." Putin held mock elections in which the people of the four above mentioned countries cast mock votes in a mock e…

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Funny story: The Reason Why Russia's All-Girl Heavy Metal Band Is Sitting In a Brooklyn Jail

The Reason Why Russia's All-Girl Heavy Metal Band Is Sitting In a Brooklyn Jail

BROOKLYN - (Satire News) - The Cloud 9 News Agency reports that the all-girl heavy metal band from Russia is sitting in jail. According to writer Lexi Aspen, the band members made some very nasty comments regarding VP Kamala Harris having some kin…

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Funny story: Great Britain's Aircraft Carrier "The Big Ben" Sinks a Russian Destroyer and Two Commie Submarines

Great Britain's Aircraft Carrier "The Big Ben" Sinks a Russian Destroyer and Two Commie Submarines

LONDON - (UK Satire) - Prime Minister Liz Truss is proud to announce that the UK's "Big Ben," England's largest and most powerful aircraft carrier, has just sunk the Russian destroyer "The Leningrad" along with two Russian subs "The Sea Squid" and "T…

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