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The Secret England Footballer: Russia 2018 Call Up

Funny story: The Secret England Footballer: Russia 2018 Call Up

I know...I know what you’re thinking. How is it that after two years in the wilderness Gormless Gareth has seen the light and called me back into the squad? I’ll tell you how. Even GG knows class when he sees it and it’s when the going gets tough...

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Children's Storytime: Sergei And The Drone

Funny story: Children's Storytime: Sergei And The Drone

Hello, children! It's time for a story! Are you ready? If you are, let's start! Once upon a time, there was a man whose name was Sergei Skripal. He lived in a country far away, called Russia. He was a spy. Spies like to find out things. They like to find out about other people's secrets. They like to find out about secrets like what other people are doing, or what the other people are trying...

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Trump breaks free of his Russian programming. Issues brief statement.

The question of whether President Trump is some kind of Manchurian Candidate subject to Russian mind control has long been a subject of speculation among some Americans. Well Thursday night the whole country got their answer. Under hypnosis Preside...

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Editorial: May Attacks Syria

So after PM May decided “fuck it” and bombed the shit out of another country on tenuous evidence (where have we heard this before) she now fears a public backlash. The main shame is that she won’t be receiving said “back lashes” across her back with a glass encrusted whip. The carrion eyed cunt completely misjudged the public appetite for more wanton slaughter from above and now fear repercussi...

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Boris Blames

Back and to the Left news and Boris Johnson have something in common. Both of us like to make up wildly inaccurate stories to discredit or embarrass others. However where we are a pair of idiots travelling around the country singing stupid songs he i...

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Putin denies Soccer World Cup to be played in Russia

In breaking news, the Kremlin has denied reports that the soccer World Cup will be staged in Russia in June this year. Russian Foreign Minister Sergey Laughitoff, speaking from the Kremlin Nerve Agent Denial Directorate, commented "We reject this...

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Cambridge Analytica Hacked My Spoof Account, Claims Hull Man

Funny story: Cambridge Analytica Hacked My Spoof Account, Claims Hull Man

A writer on the satirical news website, The Spoof, has claimed that data firm Cambridge Analytica has invaded his internet space, hacked into both his published AND unpublished spoof submissions, and altered them. Moys Kenwood, originally from Hul...

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Russia’s Maria Zakharova and the UK’s Boris Johnson meet for kick-box wrestling match at the Hague

Funny story: Russia’s Maria Zakharova and the UK’s Boris Johnson meet for kick-box wrestling match at the Hague

Press Secretary of the Russian Foreign Ministry Maria Zakharova has had her challenge to UK’s Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson accepted. Mr. Johnson and Ms. Zakharova went at it just last evening inside an ICC auditorium, standing room only. In...

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Trump denies meddling in Russian election

Funny story: Trump denies meddling in Russian election

Russian President Putin has won another landslide election, bringing him another six years of power to add to the fourteen he has already enjoyed. However, some were sceptical about how the balding murdering former spy was able to manage such a feat.

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Boris and Bluster

Political blowhard, part time Foreign Secretary and full time hard boiled twat Boris Johnson has claimed that “Russia has stockpiles of chemical weapons”. After a steady belch he said: “We’ve got evidence, that I of course can’t disclose here beca...

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Russians poisoning Russians in the UK! And now the Chinese are doing it with their takeaways!

Funny story: Russians poisoning Russians in the UK! And now the Chinese are doing it with their takeaways!

If Russia, seemingly behind poisonous attacks in the UK, wasn't bad enough! No, the Chinese are also rattling their sabres (not cyber ones) on the Green Island by stuffing their takeaways with deadly salt and sugar! Chinese takeaway lovers who pur...

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New Russian Pantomime

Moscow State Ensemble is to produce a brand new Christmas pantomime entitled, Planet of the Poison Dwarf. Guess who is playing the leading role of Putrid the Poison Dwarf, none other than the great leader himself, chosen from the single candidate who...

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Russophobia diagnosed as swollen media glands and bacteria mites at lobus occipitalis publicae

Funny story: Russophobia diagnosed as swollen media glands and bacteria mites at lobus occipitalis publicae

Recent occipital lobe studies at Oxford and MIT universities have at last defined causes in the epidemic of Russophobia sweeping the globe. Russophobia = Russian meddling directed by Vladimir Putin wearing black gloves and hunching his back, or fo...

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White House To Arm Every School Child In America With Shoulder Fired Missile Launcher

In response to the latest FBI Investigation into Russian collusion, the White House announced today that it was signing an executive order to take effect immediately. The only way to stop a bad guy with a gun, is with a bigger good guy with two...

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Trump Executes Orders

Funny story: Trump Executes Orders

This morning, President Trump utilized his “executive time;” normally spent watching “Fox & Friends,” firing off tweets recommended by Sean Hannity or watching “Roadrunner” cartoons, to execute (2) new Executive Orders and one widely anticipated...

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Song and Dance Ensemble plus Chorale respond to Representative Nunes FISA memo

Funny story: Song and Dance Ensemble plus Chorale respond to Representative Nunes FISA memo

Following release of the FISA memo last Friday, the investigative arms of the American Government are reported aghast. Agents of the FBI and DOJ were observed reeling toward the locker room over the weekend. Additionally, MSM members as with Th...

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Ivanka, We Need to Talk

Funny story: Ivanka, We Need to Talk

Ivanka, it's Jared. We need to talk. It's about your dad and this whole Russia thing. I can't do what you're expecting me to do. Flynn just turned himself in, and you know, I'm the one who told Flynn to cut the deal on the sanctions. Your dad made me. But now your dad says he can't recall that, and he's going to throw me under the bus. He promises a pardon, and says I will never go to j...

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World warned not to download software from Russia, Iran or North Korea

Funny story: World warned not to download software from Russia, Iran or North Korea

Britain's cyber chief has warned governments across the globe to beware of Russia computer programs that may damage their operating system. The head of the National Cyber Security Centre revealed that the Polonium Utility, marketed by Spetsnaz Sof...

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Breaking news…

Referendum To Ban And Remove Trump

Gosh, since Ireland was successful with their referendum to remove the ban on abortion, can the U.S. have a referendum to ban and remove Trump?
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