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Ancient Vampire Who Yearns for Death Reviews Oceans 8

900 year old vampire Ardith Dartan, who wishes for nothing more than to finally be freed from his wretched existence, shared his thoughts about the latest film in the long running Oceans series. “I found the heist to be less interesting than the...

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Review of Bethlehem Motel 24th December by Joseph

Funny story: Review of Bethlehem Motel 24th December by Joseph

TripAdvisor Review of Bethlehem Motel - 24th December -0001 We stayed at the Bethlehem Motel for one night on 24th December and wish we'd never bothered!! I should have known better with just a single star above the hotel sign. I was shattered and really just needed a place to rest my ass and heavily pregnant fiancée for the night. When we arrived the Motel owner told us we were in luck as h...

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Movie Review: Adam Sandler's "The Ridiculous 6"

Funny story: Movie Review: Adam Sandler's "The Ridiculous 6"

Although Adam Sandler has made a lot of ridiculous movies, The Ridiculous 6 is his most ridiculous yet. And this film is very offensive, too, making it about as funny as Charles Manson wielding an AR-15. The exclusive film carrier - Netflix - along with Sandler, and at least one other member of the cast, Vanilla Ice, seem to have a insouciant attitude about this matter, but many American Indian...

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Movie Review: That New Movie With That Guy From That Other Movie, You Know The One, Was Good.

Funny story: Movie Review: That New Movie With That Guy From That Other Movie, You Know The One, Was Good.

Some movies which are panned by critics nevertheless are highly successful due to word of mouth praises by people who've seen the movie. They tell their friends and family, who tell their friends, and so on, until the movie is a hit, despite those 'o...

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Book Review - The Great Gatsby by F Scott Fitzgerald

I have read many reviews of this book and of course, it is a classic, therefore I won't bore you with my review. That said..... I felt it a little presumptuous of the author to call his book "Great" before it was even published; after considerable research I discovered that the original title of this book was just "The Gatsby" and 'Great' was added by Miss Fitzgerald - just to sell her boo...

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Book Review - Yoga For Dummies

Where oh where do I start with this review? First of all I think the writer of this book is obviously "having a laugh" at our, the readers - expense. Secondly, who on earth would buy this book? I did. I own a clothes shop, we sell suits, nice suits, but sales have been down, I didn't know if it was due to our opening hours (2.00 am - 4.00 am - Wednesdays only), my sales staff (a mute...

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Book Review - Henry V by William Shakespeare

Just who is the secretive Henry V...what does the V stand for? Viktor, Vaughn, Vincent or even Vanessa? No, seriously, I know that V means 5 in French or some other 'silly' language. So, my real question about this book is...what happened to parts 1,2,3 and 4 of this series....and will there be a sixth installment? I wish writers would not start a series of books with the fifth one....s...

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Book Review - Noah's Ark by God

This book bears no resemblance to the movie starring Australian actor Russell Crowe! That said, I would be interested if Crowe, in his role as Noah, wanted to make room on his Ark for kangaroos, wallabies and Koala bears; as I saw none board the ark in the movie. As an Australian he should really have insisted. Also, and this is just an observation, did he get a massive discount at Petsm...

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Book Review - Fifty Shades of Grey by E L James

This is a book I simply could not put down, due entirely to the fact that I was involved in a rather unfortunate sexual bondage role play game involving 234 rolls of sticky tape. And a goat. However, once I managed to remove the goat from my apartment I did read the book. There are many words I could use to describe this book, fantastic, great, superb, remarkable, outstanding, stupendous...

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Book Review - Peter Pan by Some Bloke Called Barry

This book "Hooked" me from page one, one of the only bright memories of a sad childhood plagued by bouts of bed wetting, temper tantrums and soiled underwear......I really wish Grandma hadn't moved in with us.... I digress. Peter pan is a kid that never grow up, a bit like Arnold from Different Strokes. However, instead of being adopted by a rich white guy, Peter Pan embarks on a horrendo...

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Book Review - The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas

One of my favorite books. Once I realized it was not a non-fiction book about a census study on a small French Island or a Sesame Street character with a fetish for numbers and in fact a tale of revenge, hidden identities and twists I was pleasantly surprised. If in fact anyone did compile a census of Monte Cristo, and did indeed count the residents of the small island, I am led to believe t...

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Book Review - Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea by Jules Verne

This book was a little too deep for my liking. As a shallow sort of guy I was a little out of my depth. As I read it my heart sank as I plunged into a depression. I do not like to whale, and I am not fishing for compliments, but this was oceans worse than my book, Seven Leagues Under the Sea. Anyway, I hope that in the years to come Miss Verne writes other books, she is a talented write...

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Book Review - The List by Steve Martini

A Twat is a MASSIVE fan of Steve Martin. He loved him in Parenthood and Parenthood 3 (not so hot on Parenthood 2) and he is utterly hilariously as that guy with the big nose. A TWAT DID NOT KNOW HE WROTE BOOKS! Wow! What a talented guy, despite his big nose. What the list is, A Twat does not know, by A Twat, who is continuing to write in third person, also could write a book about lists...

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Book Review - The Postman Always Rings Twice by James M Cain

A Twat wishes his postman would ring once! Many a time A Twat have missed letters and packages because he is too LAZY to ring the doorbell...and he hates A Twat's pack of rottweilers that A Twat allows to roam around in A Twat's yard. A Twat suggests that A Twat's postman read this book and consider ringing at least once in future! A Twat liked this book and A Twat has today decided to refer...

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Book Review - The Runaway Jury by John Grisham

Based on the movie me thinks, of the same name, starring John Cusack, Rachel Weisz and Gene Hackman, directed by Gary Fleder. This isn't the first time Grisham has stolen ideas from movies, then passed them off as 'original novels'. The Firm, The Client, A Time to Killer, all ripped from the big screen. Is it me? Has no one else noticed? I think it is now high time that Grisham focus...

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Book Review - Abraham Lincoln by Carl Sandburg

I enjoyed it, I am a big fan of any book about Lincoln, but, unfortunately like many biographies about this man NO mention of his vampire hunting youth. If you can get over that then you will enjoy. The Second Sex by Simone de Beauvoir I thought this was a self help book, as I suffer from one second sex, premature ejaculation, for want of a better phrase. Unfortunately it wasn't, so the p...

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Book Review - Death of a Transvestite by Ed Wood

"Hero/heroine Glen Marker sits on Death Row and offers to tell his life story in all its sordid detail in exchange for his last wish: to die in drag! I understand that Saddam Hussein and Colonel Gaddafi made the same request but it was refused. The Fry Chronicles by Stephen Fry This is NOT a cookbook on how to do eggs, french fries or any other food that involves hot oil. After I read i...

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Book Review - Happy Days by Samuel Beckett

Utter drivel! A complaint waste of time and money. No mention of Fonzie, No Ralph Malph, No Richie, No Arnold's and not even a whiff of Mr C or Mrs C. Sorry, and I make NO apologies,to write a book about Happy Days and not include some of the main characters is, quite frankly, idiotic. Samuel Beckett, sir, I beg you rewrite this nonsense and include the aforementioned characters. You...

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