Have you ever heard the lyrics to a popular Christmas carol “He’s making a list. He’s checking it twice. He’s gonna find out who’s naughty or nice”? Many people wrongfully assume that the carol is referring to Santa Claus, but it's actually Joseph St…
It has long been reported that the numbers of ex-servicemen who attend Remembrance Sunday events are falling. Now it appears that many of them are simply forgetting to turn up. We asked some of them to try to understand why. Geoff De'ath, 81, of M...
London - The Queen nearly had a fatal seizure today when a colony of mutant Belgian parasitic Arion vulgaris slugs leaped out at her 'from inside the sods' as she opened a Remembrance garden created with soil from Belgian First World War battlefield...
London - Government ministers are drawing lots for the dubious pleasure of standing near Tony Blair at the Remembrance commemoration in Whitehall this Sunday. Last year M'Noble Lord drew the short straw that saw nostrils pucker at the sickening, '...
London - Roadkill millinery enthusiasts are having none of it, of course, but today's display of hideous royal headgear nearly cracked Outside Broadcasting camera lenses at the annual Whitehall memorial service. "At least Prince Andrew's gargoyle...
The United States government decided during their discussions on how to boost the economy, that they should take Sunday off the weekly calender. President Barack Obama stated that Sunday is an outdated idea and that it needs to be discontinued immedi...
A history student at one our top universities has made a vital discovery about the Festival of Remembrance. Daryl Cocktailglass studies at the University of Thames Valley East, and is in the third year of his history degree. He said: "I saw all...
London - (Tenner Lady/Ass Mess): Assembled dignitaries held their noses as the wind suddenly changed direction, a gag-inducing waft of nausea oozing from the ex-Prime Monster. First to turn a queasy shade of green was the Chief of Defence Staff, h...
Reports today suggest that the Muslims Against Crusades (MAC) group that burnt poppies during a two minute silence to mark the anniversary of Armistice Day, were in fact heroin addicts who hoodwinked themselves into purchasing the poppies in the beli...
London - (RIP Mess): Will the Queen spearhead the nation's mood by joining the Grateful - er...Glorious! - Dead in a Remembrance Sunday shocker? Plans for a poignant Saturday night televised farewell were scrapped earlier this year. Thousands o...
Millions of British people today have condemned the war criminals Anthony Blair MP and President George W. Bush, for attempting to invade the sovereign independent nations of Iraq and Afghanistan, leading to thousands of dead civilians and British an...
London - (Dead Cert): Following a Mourning Line tipoff an Enniskillen Rangers supporter is in hiding having laid a 250/1 twenty quid punt the Queen's going belly up outside the Cenotaph Sunday. Provisional Flag of Convenience IRA bastards killed 1...
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