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Funny satire stories about Quasimodo

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Funny story: Rip Van Biden Finally Wakes Up: Can’t Stop Talking

Rip Van Biden Finally Wakes Up: Can’t Stop Talking

BILLINGSGATE POST: After six months of silent hibernation in his basement, Rip Van Biden finally wakes up and can’t stop talking. “This can happen,” says noted Sleep Therapist, Dr. Quasimodo, who heads the Deep Sleep Department at Harvard Univers…

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Funny story: Coping With Coronavirus Boredom

Coping With Coronavirus Boredom

BILLINGSGATE POST: The silence was deafening. All was quiet on the Western front. Not even the the Banshee rag pickers were howling. It was worse than that. Mice were nibbling on Velveeta cheese with rubber-tipped teeth so that their sounds were muf...

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Funny story: Anti-Vivisection Society Demands Saudi Arabia Reassemble Khashoggi

Anti-Vivisection Society Demands Saudi Arabia Reassemble Khashoggi

BILLINGSGATE POST: If there was a bounce to Hannibal Lecter’s step last year as he exited the Saudi Arabia Embassy in Istanbul with a new lampshade in his arms, was it because he was light in his loafers, or was it just because he was satisfied with...

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Funny story: Looking Glass War: Putin To Allow Bolton To Testify In Impeachment Trial

Looking Glass War: Putin To Allow Bolton To Testify In Impeachment Trial

BILLINGSGATE POST: The wings of the hummingbird fluttering outside the window of John Bolton’s Washington office were squeaking, not humming. Bolton awoke from his brown Naugahyde BarcaLounger with a start. A workman with a can of WD-90 approached th...

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Funny story: Ask Dr. Billingsgate: He Knows All, Sees All, Tells All

Ask Dr. Billingsgate: He Knows All, Sees All, Tells All

BILLINGSGATE POST: Dr. Billingsgate takes questions from vitally-concerned non-entities who wish to take advantage of this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to probe the innards of the good doctor’s inner-self: Dear Dr. B: You have been very critic...

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Funny story: Olympics To Offer Inter-Sex, All Specie Competition: Dog Diarrhea Contest Possible

Olympics To Offer Inter-Sex, All Specie Competition: Dog Diarrhea Contest Possible

BILLINGSGATE POST: The IAAF, the governing body that determines eligibility for international amateur sports, has decreed that future Olympics must offer an open division to include all comers. In order to adjust for “intersex” female athletes who p...

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Funny story: Mysterious Man With Hunchback Seen Exiting Notre Dame During Fire

Mysterious Man With Hunchback Seen Exiting Notre Dame During Fire

BILLINGSGATE POST: In most mystery stories, the culprit is usually the butler. In large churches, such as cathedrals, they don’t have butlers. But they do have sextons employed to maintain the church. Quasimodo wasn’t part of that team. He, as yo...

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Funny story: Joe Biden Doesn’t Pass Sniff Test: Muffs On Wife’s Hair

Joe Biden Doesn’t Pass Sniff Test: Muffs On Wife’s Hair

BILLINGSGATE POST: Joe Biden muffed when attempting to identify his wife’s hair. In a staged test set up by the Democrat National Committee, Biden was asked to correctly identify the hair of a number of randomly selected Individuals that included h...

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Funny story: Trumplovian Dog Slobber Caused By Marmaduke Acid Reflux Syndrome (MARS)

Trumplovian Dog Slobber Caused By Marmaduke Acid Reflux Syndrome (MARS)

BILLINGSGATE POST: Newsworthy only because it appears to be, this subject might seem to be relevant, even though it’s not. If it were, no one capable of understanding it would read it, especially in this forum. In a much discussed experiment invo...

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Funny story: Slim And Dirty Discuss Skanks, Mueller And The Quasimodo Effect

Slim And Dirty Discuss Skanks, Mueller And The Quasimodo Effect

BILLINGSGATE POST: Regardless of your political leanings, a chance to be privy to a once-in-life-time conversation between Slim Everdingle and Detrick “Dirty Trick” Detwiler as they talk about the ultimate trifecta; Skanks, Mueller and the Quasimodo...

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Funny story: Trumpalope: Just A Chance Encounter Between Trump and An Antelope?

Trumpalope: Just A Chance Encounter Between Trump and An Antelope?

BILLINGSGATE POST: The question as to whether Donald Trump is a New Age Centaur, or just the result of a chance encounter between a two-legged Trumpster and a four-legged antelope, is now being belted around the Beltway. Although most anthropologi...

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Funny story: Quasi-Rondo Auditions as Bellringer

Quasi-Rondo Auditions as Bellringer

Celtic fans wondered what Rajon Rondo had to say about the Ray Allen debacle in Boston. Many Celtic insiders have been blaming Allen's disaffection and departure on the cold shoulder Rondo often gave him during the games and at dinner. The resp...

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Funny story: Extra shoulder pads hide that the Queen's a hunchback says royal couturier

Extra shoulder pads hide that the Queen's a hunchback says royal couturier

London - Nifty use of crafty shoulder pads conceals that 'Hunchback of Notre Dame' look that's plagued Queen Elizabeth ever since her wedding night back in '47. Apparently some nuptial gymnastics on a Buckingham Palace four poster dislocated her a...

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Funny story: Patriot's Belichick To Deploy Reverse Quasimodo Bell Defense To Ring In Tim Tebow

Patriot's Belichick To Deploy Reverse Quasimodo Bell Defense To Ring In Tim Tebow

FOXBOROUGH - Who says that Bill Belichick won't break down the specific game plan before an upcoming game? Yesterday in a press conference he announced that he was going to use the reverse Quasimodo bell defense in an attempt to "ring in" Bronco qua...

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