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Funny satire stories about Pope Francis

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Funny story: The Pope is Still Taking a Shit on Kids

The Pope is Still Taking a Shit on Kids

As Pope Francis was taking a shit and jerking off to old pictures of Macaulay Culkin and various boy band promo photos, this reporter snuck into the royal papal outhouse to ask the pontiff about his July visit to Canada. He would be going there be…

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Funny story: The Pope Says That Gay Is Just A Three-Letter Word For Happy

The Pope Says That Gay Is Just A Three-Letter Word For Happy

THE VATICAN, Italy – (World Satire) – The Vatican Voice reports that Pope Francis has had a bit of a change of heart regarding the world of gaydom. The VV states that after lots of soul searching Pope Fran, as Piers Morgan calls him, has let it be…

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Funny story: The Vatican Mandates That Effective Immediately Adult Catholics Will Be Prohibited From Having Sex On Wednesdays (Hump Day)

The Vatican Mandates That Effective Immediately Adult Catholics Will Be Prohibited From Having Sex On Wednesdays (Hump Day)

THE VATICAN – (Satire News) – The Vatican Voice has just reported that Pope Francis has just issued a sexual mandate to all adult Catholics of the world. He has said that due to so much sexualized pandemical stuff going around he is mandating that…

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Funny story: Donald Trump Wants To Travel To The Vatican To Have a Private Meeting With Pope Francis – The Pope Replies “Hell No!!!”

Donald Trump Wants To Travel To The Vatican To Have a Private Meeting With Pope Francis – The Pope Replies “Hell No!!!”

NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – Kimberly Guilfoyle, the human chewing gum (because she annoyingly sticks to guys with money, lots of money) has just revealed that the Trumptard wants to fly to the Vatican. Apparently the twice-impeached, one-term…

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Funny story: The Catholic Church Confirms That Trump Is Positively, Without A Shadow of a Doubt, Going To Hell!

The Catholic Church Confirms That Trump Is Positively, Without A Shadow of a Doubt, Going To Hell!

THE VATICAN – (Satire News) – The highly respected Catholic publication, The Vatican Voice, has just reported that never in the history of mankind, has there been an individual who deserves to Go To Hell more than one Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump.

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Funny story: Biden Meets with Pope Francis to Trade Baseball Cards

Biden Meets with Pope Francis to Trade Baseball Cards

While on his visit to The Vatican, President Biden, only the second Catholic president in the history of the United States, said he was excited to see what he could get for his Andrew McCutchen rookie card. “Cutch is a five-time all star. He has…

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Funny story: A Well-Respected Vatican Publication Names Donald Trump "The Most Evil Person Since Adolf Hitler"

A Well-Respected Vatican Publication Names Donald Trump "The Most Evil Person Since Adolf Hitler"

THE VATICAN – (Satire News) – The highly-respected Vatican Voice News Agency has just listed it’s choices for mean, hateful, and worthless individuals. Winners in the past have included Sean Hannity, Jeffrey Epstein, O.J. Simpson, Omarosa, and Ann…

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Funny story: Donald Trump Begs The Pope To Please Help Keep Him Out of Prison

Donald Trump Begs The Pope To Please Help Keep Him Out of Prison

PALM BEACH, Florida – - (Satire News) - Reports out of Trump’s Mar-a-Lago mansion state that he is beginning to feel the heat from all of his illegal shenanigans committed throughout the past decades. iRumors reported that he is so scared about go…

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Funny story: Two Popes: First an Academy Award winning movie, then the book, now for the joke!

Two Popes: First an Academy Award winning movie, then the book, now for the joke!

Millions of people around the world have watched and enjoyed the film classic about the meeting between Pope Benedict and the not yet-Pope Francis. That was soon followed by the book or technically the screenplay, released in paperback shortly follow…

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Funny story: Exclusive: Pope Francis Talks to the Beatles Channel

Exclusive: Pope Francis Talks to the Beatles Channel

The beloved, down-to-earth, everyman leader of Catholicism Pope Francis, sat down this past week with Dennis Elsas and Bill Flanagan on their weekly show. The Fab Forum is a fan favorite, broadcast on the Beatles Channel. Yours truly was also ther…

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Funny story: Pope Francis Never Asked For A Blanket Pardon

Pope Francis Never Asked For A Blanket Pardon

Who asks for a blanket pardon? Not Pope Francis, or the Barefoot Contessa, Julie Andrews, or anyone gloriously famed for their Spic & Span immaculate reputation. Congressman Matt Gaetz asked Donald Trump for a blanket pardon before Trump left…

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Funny story: Was Biden’s Lap Dance Divinely Inspired?

Was Biden’s Lap Dance Divinely Inspired?

BILLINGSGATE POST: Although a spokesperson for Joe Biden stands by his statement that Biden claims to be on first-name terms with God, he conceded that the old Obama sidekick was using a figure of speech when declaring that "God and I call each othe…

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Funny story: Was Slim Everdingle Divinely Inspired?

Was Slim Everdingle Divinely Inspired?

BILLINGSGATE POST: Although a spokesman for The Church of Rightful Indignation stood by his statement that church member Slim Everdingle claimed to be on first-name terms with God, he conceded that the Slim was using a figure of speech when declari...

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Funny story: To End World Hunger, Vatican Scientists Replicate Transubstantiation

To End World Hunger, Vatican Scientists Replicate Transubstantiation

The Vatican—Saying “God has now miraculously revealed how to turn seven loaves and a few small fish into a worldwide smorgasbord,” a Vatican spokesperson announced today that their scientists have figured out the physics behind the process of transub...

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Funny story: Pope Francis to Eliminate Celibacy for Priests--Nun Surprised

Pope Francis to Eliminate Celibacy for Priests--Nun Surprised

Standing before a congregation of jubilant priests and journalists from around the globe, Pope Francis announced termination of celibacy for male clergy under 50 years old. In making the historic announcement, the Pope cited workplace safety. "I can...

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Funny story: Vatican Scientists Clone Jesus from Communion Wafer

Vatican Scientists Clone Jesus from Communion Wafer

The Vatican—Pope Francis today unveiled a ten-year-old Jesus whom, he explained, was cloned from a consecrated communion wafer blessed by Mother Theresa. The Vatican, to avoid too much publicity for the ten-year-old god, had kept the cloning under w...

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Funny story: Pope Stuck in Elevator--Now Understands Purgatory

Pope Stuck in Elevator--Now Understands Purgatory

At an impromptu news conference, Vatican Spokesperson Alessandro Gisotti explained to an overflow crowd of reporters that Pope Francis was late to celebrate Sunday mass due to an elevator malfunction. Gisotti went to great length to say the Pope was...

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