A new virus with pandemic potential has been discovered by scientists in the home of deadly viruses, China. This virus, they say, originated in pigs. Oink oink. The new discovery comes hot on the trotters of the current Covid-19 pandemic, an...
NEW YORK CITY – The McDonalds Corporation has stated that they, like all fast food restaurants, are losing a tremendous amount of business. The New York World Register newspaper is reporting that people are not going out to eat because of the COVI...
For new mothers seeking to give their offspring the health benefits of breast milk without having to get too close, gestation crates, commonly used in pork production, have now been approved for human use. "It's perfect," said new mom Kim Lowell,...
Montana farmer Kevin Johannesen, who prides himself on his ethically-sourced meat, has found that his free-range, pasture-raised pork chops do not do well in direct sunlight. "We thought that the direct light would be good for boosting vitamin D...
Illinois farmer Jake ("Boss") Hogg was out walking his dogs early Monday morning, when he made a startling discovery. "It was awful quiet in the paddock. I couldn't see my hogs anywhere, so I walked the dogs around the perimeter of the fence.
At a recent workplace luncheon, Ellen Harding of Charleston, South Carolina, lambasted her colleagues for their hypocrisy in chowing down on hot chicken and burgers while insisting how much they loved their pets. An omnivore herself, Ellen claimed th...
The Longest Day, that annual feast that celebrates having more time to do stuff during daylight than on any of the other 364 days, has arrived once again! Known by people in times gone by as 'the Longest Day', the Longest Day can be as much as 1 m...
After a long and thankless career in politics, Theresa May is to find peace at last next month when she steps down as Prime Minister. The wrinkly prude will be driven to an abattoir and hoisted roughly onto a flat sawdust-covered table. There a me...
A scandal has erupted in the usually genteel world of the Church of England. The Bishop of Chaffinch St Cock, Geoff "The Defiler" Futtock, has been captured on video in a horrific act featuring dozens of dead swine. In the video, Bishop Futtock ca...
A pig named Pete made waves recently when he declined a potentially lucrative opportunity to be featured in the logo for Nashville hot spot Happy Hog BBQ, despite admittedly not having an alternative source of income. Pete was reportedly immune to...
Not the funny police story you think it is, a report has reached us that a family living in a remote countryside area outside the city of Battambang, were sharing their living space with a flock of pigs. An eyewitness, Moys Kenwood, who just happe...
Good-humored hog Hank Daniel of Nashville, Tennessee, a lover of a raucous, in-your-face comedy who prides himself on being able to both dish it out and take it, was intrigued when he learned of a pig “roast” to be held the following Saturday afterno...
A man has been charged with walking a pig along a busy city street in Norwich - without a lead. His pleas that "this is Norwich, everyone does it, and, anyway, she's my girlfriend," were dismissed by Norwich Constabulary Special Victims' Unit. No...
A luxury UK prison in Boston, UK (logical), crowned as the 'cushiest' prison in the UK, only accepts meat-eating inmates because the canteen only serves pork from local pigs, and vegetarian or Muslim inmates cannot be allowed to go hungry! The pri...
The American love affair with bacon has caused a major crisis in the piggy industry because there aint enough piggies to be slaughtered to keep up with demand! Bacon Butties smothered with Daddies Sauce, a specialized product exported from the UK...
UK Prime Minister Call Me Dave has admitted that he once had sexual intercourse with a pig as part of a game of 'Truth or Dare.' The game was carried out as part of the future prime minister's initiation into the exclusive and infamous 'Knobs Klub...
Internet providers scambled on Monday to get their servers back on line after nude photos of Sen. Ted Cruz were posted on line by a Hollywood Gossip site. The photos (so graphic that they caused projectile vomiting by some internet users) where...
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