An Oklahoma City man and his eight year old boy were on their way to a Trump rally to give the boy's spelling bee award to Donald Trump, but unfortunately the man's son never made it: Joe Di Pietro said the family car was broadsided by an inattentive...
Telly chiefs have become embroiled in a bitter row over the portrayal of organ donation in a recent episode of flagship drama Holby City. Three complaints were made in a scathing attack on the "recklessness" over the way the difficult subject was...
The NHS has announced a major shake-up in its approach to increasing the supply of available donor organs for transplant. Dr Albert Spleen, head of the NHS Transplant Authority, told us "We have been wrestling with this problem for years. The numb...
Should Hugh Hefner get a dead person's working kidney to replace his own faulty one just because he's a national treasure? Yes, according to a group of senior celebrities led by Betty White. "We even think non-celebrities who are elderly should...
The illegal trade in human organs is reportedly set to boom after it was confirmed Welsh families would have no legal right to stop dead relatives' organs being used for transplant if the person had not opted out in advance. Traders in the highly...
Prisoners willing to donate their organs to others in need are being offered parole in many prisons across the US. Prison parole boards are being inundated with requests from prisoners willing to donate anything in an attempt to get released early...
A computer software glitch has resulted in 25 organ donors having the wrong organs removed. The shocking revelation came about following the death of a man who had indicated he wished to donate his eyes but instead had his head removed. It appe...
Global model and international socialite Peaches Geldof, 15, the daughter of gnarled curmudgeon and professional beggar Bob Geldof, 98, has become an organ donor, a source close to unemployment revealed to the Daily Figment, yesterday, writes Bertram...
Panic swept through the kingdom today as the composite list of over 800,000 Britons was mistakenly sorted through a lotto machine. The random redistribution of donor's desire was a direct result of cost cutting measures or possibly one pissed off...
Now, on top of America's healthcare crisis, our nation is currently faced with a shortage of organ donations. As crazy as it may seem, in this land of abundance, violence, and abundant violence, we can't seem to get organ transplants to people who desperately need them, primarily due to lack of donations. Well, once again, the Big Asshole has come up with some really keen ideas that can get us thr...
Denver, CO - How can fifty-five uninsured people get insurance for free AND solve an organ shortage in Colorado? Fifty-five people without health insurance are going under the knife in a local butcher shop here, according to my source, the butcher...
Vienna - (Ponzi Scam Mess): A mysterious benefactor, believed to be an octogenarian Jewish woman with Nazi ancestry and untreatable dellusions of monarchy, has paid off a £91 million bail bond for fraudster banker Julius Meinl V. Meinl, 69, had sp...
Dr. Sigmund Scrunt, Head of Pathology at the NHS-affiliated PFI company Organs-R-Us, says more people need to donate their brains to medical research if cures for diseases like Athlete's Foot and Galloping Dandruff are to be found. Dr. Scrunt exp...
Mayor of Blackpool Mr Reg Tapworth has become the first council member to join the organ donation program. He told our reporter "The NHS is always banging on about not having enough organs to go around, so I'm going to redress the balance by dona...
With the news that a new windpipe has been purpose grown for a Spanish patient hospitals and clinics have been flooded with requests for help. Unsurprisingly many applications are for new "organs" for under endowed English Hoodies. "These nasty...
A new proposal plan to allow hospital doctors to remove vital organs for transplant from dying patients, whether or not they carry Donor Cards, has come under fire from people who are worried they may be sliced open against their will. Prime Minis...
A system of presumed consent for organ donation was rejected today after a panel of experts investigated organ donation across the world. Spain has the highest rate of organ donation in the world, and has been running a presumed consent system for...
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