BALTIMORE - (Satire News) - Marjorie Taylor has become perhaps the most popular congresswoman in the history of the United States. Boom Boom News reports that she has certainly had more boyfriends that the five Kardashian sisters combined. Dona…
COPENHAGEN, Denmark - (Satire News) - The government of Denmark has given in to the wishes of the amusement theme park-going crowd. The Danish Secretary of Amusement Parks, Saraliva Ringkobing, has just issued a new policy change for everyone of D…
CLEVELAND, Ohio - (Sports Satire) - A recent QuinniPinni Poll has just revealed an astoundingly astonishing fact. The poll which was taken of over 13 million Americans between the ages of 21 and 101, clearly showed, without a shadow of a doubt tha…
PHILADELPHIA – (Satire News) – The Rubberized Rubber Company of Philadelphia has informed the public that it will discontinue their line of pizza-flavored condoms. Lana D. Tinhaus, a spokeswoman for RRC stated that they decided on the move after r…
DES MOINES, Iowa - (Satire News) – Iowa’s Department of Statistics has stated that due to a tremendous increase in Iowans engaging in oral sex, condom sales have fallen drastically. One Evangelical male, Lollard Q. Fugfit, 83, excitingly said that…
(UNEDITED) According to the laws of human biology, human male's sex-drive normally diminishes by the time they reach 65! However, due to viagra, etc, many male humans have prolonged the enjoyment, sadly their missus's do not share the same urge! O…
WEST CHESTER,PA—Good things come to those who wait and to those who can wait to come. Bad things, unfortunately, are the fate of the one in five men between the ages of eighteen and fifty-nine who suffer from the social scourge of premature ejaculati...
NEW YORK—Walmart Inc [NYSE: WMT, 116.92, ▲ 0.90 (0.78%)] announced yesterday that it will begin selling CBD-infused dental dams in all its retail outlets by Thanksgiving. The move is seen by industry analysts as an attempt to boost dental dam sales—a...
New York, NY - (Reuterus): Face masks are being issued by Mile High Airways after air con swab tests revealed Club Class passengers’ coughing and sneezing is down to soaring levels of sperm. Technicians discovered billions of sperm colony-forming...
"It's a no-brainer. Who wouldn't want to sell all the ingredients for the after-party? Viagra for that long lasting erection, along with Sensodyne for oral health, and Chapstick to moisten those dry, cracked lips. We also do Panadol for the hangover,...
Nabisco has announced it is fed up with all the loser crackers in the Senate giving their cracker products a bad name. Amongst others, Nabisco has agreed to remove Orin Hatched, Charles Assley, Lindsey Gram, John Cornin, Ted Cruise, Ben Sassy, Jeff...
Comely adult film star Felicity Fellatio admitted today that following rave reviews for her new look, she no longer resorted to electrolysis, plucking, shaving, creams or any form of depilation and claimed that men are loving it. Felicity spoke ex...
Reports have just surfaced of a gay affair between Donald Trump and Bill Clinton Apparently, The Donald grabs more than just pussies. "Yes", confirmed Trump, "my tie has tested positive for Bill's DNA. Really, though, I just wanted to get the st...
A clinical research study at the Upjohn Downjill University Think Tank has concluded a favorable opinion of oral sex. A diverse collection of information was gathered stating that when asked about sexual gratification and where the subjects found...
The 'Fellatio Cafe', set to open in Geneva, Switzerland, by end of the year, will allow its customers to order a coffee before choosing a prostitute on their iPads. Men will have to pay more than £40 for the hot, robust drink and lascivious sex act,...
WASHINGTON, DC - A new study, released Wednesday, has concluded that semen, consumed orally, prevents breast cancer. The study was issued by the National Foundation for Men. The study also found these additional benefits when a man deposits sem...
Responding to the attack by David Geffen, former Clinton ally and fund raiser, and now Mitt Romney supporter that Bill would be risky (meaning frisky) to have as first man. "After Bill got "attended to" in the oval orifice by Monica Lewinsky," Mrs...
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