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Funny satire stories about NHS

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NHS to be outsourced

Sainsbury's and Tesco are the big winners of an invitation to tender organized by the NHS to cut costs and outsource specific services. Jeremy Hunt, Secretary of State for Health, welcomed the news, calling it a 'milestone' in the history of healt...

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Jeremy Hunt spends weekend waiting in a corridor

Funny story: Jeremy Hunt spends weekend waiting in a corridor

Former Health, Education, Water-parks, Traffic Control and Stationary Secretary Jeremy Hunt has spent the weekend waiting in a corridor for news of his next appointment, Deputy Prime Minister and keeper of the Parliamentary pornography. Waiting fo...

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NHS Crisis

Please note that we at Back and to the Left news hate writing about the Tory party. As we type about them our fingers bleed and we can hear the scratching of demons pushing though the thin veil of reality that surrounds our office. We'll get back to...

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UK hospitals ban chocolates and fizzy drinks claiming their food is healthier?

Funny story: UK hospitals ban chocolates and fizzy drinks claiming their food is healthier?

Stodgy treacle puddings lashed with sugar-ridden custard, fatty meat, gravy, over-cooked tasteless vegetables, fried egg and bacon breakfasts with sugar-dosed cereals, and other hospital delicacies, are more healthy claim UK hospitals than chocolate!...

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The Huntsman Commeth

Funny story: The Huntsman Commeth

The election has happened and the predicted destruction of Labour at the polls didn't happen. Which along with our all clear STI test last week was the best news we've had all year. Jeremy Corbyn looks more like a leader than ever and May will now tr...

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NHS Bless This Mess

The PM, Teresa May, emerged from her fortress of darkness to press upon the huddled masses that the NHS was not on the verge of a humanitarian crisis. The sky cracked with lightning and thunder rolled through the scene creating a atmosphere of malevo...

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Refugee Crisis Hits NHS Hard

Funny story: Refugee Crisis Hits NHS Hard

The NHS is already buckling under a massively increased workload since the refugee crisis began. Doctors and nurses are struggling to cope as hospitals are being swamped with the influx of people affected by the current conflict in the middle east...

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Immigrant arrested for stealing job.

A 30 year old Polish man has been arrested for coming over to Britain and stealing a 37 year old British man's job. The Polish man, who is yet to be named, had been in the role of stacking shelves in a warehouse for approximately eight years befor...

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"Health tourism" visitors say it's the best holiday they've ever had

Health tourism is currently one of the UK's fastest growing industries, as Europeans flock to our country to take advantage of our overstretched national health service. Though some politicians claim that it's a bad thing, health tourists themselves...

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Footage from colonoscopies to be added to Google Street View

Google today announced that it has made a deal with health providers to add colonoscopies to Street View and give users the ability to explore the intestines of anyone on the planet. Google CEO Larry Page described it as the 'logical next step' af...

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Osborne To Save Money By Issuing Discount Rail Tickets To One Remaining Central Hospital

Funny story: Osborne To Save Money By Issuing Discount Rail Tickets To One Remaining Central Hospital

To plunder even more of the country's assets to try to reach Thatcher scale carnage, George Osborne is to sell off all hospitals but one and issue rail discounts to sick people. The "savings" will enable stockbroker belt voters to pay less tax an...

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Obese patient sues doctor for "inappropriate" weight comment

Funny story: Obese patient sues doctor for "inappropriate" weight comment

A doctor in Carlisle is being taken to court by one of his patients. During a meeting with a Dr Yimenez about his upcoming stomach-stapling surgery, the patient observed that the doctor had made one or two inappropriate comments about his weight.

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GPs Can Choose Only To See Healthy People Under New Agreement

Funny story: GPs Can Choose Only To See Healthy People Under New Agreement

Following recent reports which incited outrage when it was revealed that GPs can opt out of unsocial working hours, new proposals are in the offing that allow GPs the option of not having to see poorly patients. Under the new scheme GPs could earn...

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Binge Drinking Now Recommended By Government

Funny story: Binge Drinking Now Recommended By Government

The government's commissioned report into the possible beneficial effects of weekend " Binge" drinking suggests massive benefits to the NHS and Police Forces. The new vitamin drink, "Binge" is a healthy drink made from 5 a day vegetables and fruit...

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Road Accident Paramedics Replaced By Rapid Response Aromatherapists

Funny story: Road Accident Paramedics Replaced By Rapid Response Aromatherapists

Under new E.U. directives, teams of alternative medical "paratherapists" have been set up by the government. To comply with the new regulations people trapped in burning cars or requiring on the spot life saving surgery can request alternative helico...

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Many of us baffled over sharing NHS records

Almost half of Britons do not understand plans for sharing their NHS records. And increasing numbers of GPs (Geriatric Persons) are not clear how to use them. The Norman Hunter Singers (NHS) were a renowned choir based in Gateshead. They sold over...

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...Workhouse shuffle - Patients to be charged for hospital stay

Funny story: ...Workhouse shuffle - Patients to be charged for hospital stay

Patients should be charged £10 to see their Doctor and a £10 "hotel charge" to stay the night in hospital, a leading stink-tank has said. The fees could be among a raft of levies introduced to raise extra cash to fund the NHS rather than charge, a...

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Tories to introduce "Free Hospitals"

Funny story: Tories to introduce "Free Hospitals"

Following the unbridled success of screwball Education Secretary Michael Gove's Free Schools programme with its falling standards and vanity projects, Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt, Murdoch sycophant and confirmed homeopathy fan, announced today a cra...

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