It isn’t clear whether Donald J. Trump had a nervous breakdown or if Mothers Day was just a plain crazy-time blow up as usual. Donald J. sent one hundred tweets in one day, and that was his Mothers Day. The guy must have been in some kind of labor...
Seattle, Wa - A mother of two was so disappointed with her children that she wanted to recall her eggs. “They just didn’t turn out the way I had hoped,” she confided, after neither child called her for Mothers Day. “All I got was a text from my...
It’s common knowledge that most people secretly dislike their parents, blaming them for their problems in life and resenting how they raised them. This, of course, creates challenges every May when Mother’s Day rolls around. You don’t want the woman...
Kansas City, MO - Despite always on-going efforts to increase the impact of their greeting cards, Hallmark Cards has confirmed that - in the opinions of the thousands of mothers polled each year - none of the cards in their line of Mother's Day cards...
Colorado - A local radio station will be playing non-stop pot-themed music Sunday to mark the marijuana state's Mothers Day celebrations kicking off with the Bob Dylan classic Everybody Must Get Stoned. DJ Ricky Reefer plans a topical lineup of fa...
The latest casualty of the worldwide, global, double dip, triple dip, sherbet dip recession, depression, financial compression, crisis, meltdown, age of austerity looks set to be the commemorative days of Mothers and Fathers Day. The two occasions ar...
Gardeners up and down the country are on high alert due to the annual predation of daffodils by scroats planning to 'delight' their mothers. Supermarkets yesterday reported selling out of Red Bull, torch batteries and high-power water pistols (nor...
Likely Teapublican presidential candidate Mitt Romney revealed that he will be purchasing a new clothes washer for wife Ann this week. "I think it's the ideal gift for a stay-at-home mom like Ann," said Romney during a break from the campaign trail.
London - Some spectral hexoplasm shaped like a sleepwalking Kate Middleton has slid out from the Queen's vagina sending terrified royal flunkies stark raving bonkers. The apparition emanated in the monarch's bedchamber close to midnight after a tr...
(Portland, Ohio) - After failing last year, Stephen Young was not willing to be rejected by his mother again this year on Mother's day. Stephen, 32, spent the last 364 days contemplating on what he did wrong and on what he needs to do this year i...
Everywhere, USA - It's that special time again . Yes, so soon. It comes around fast. In the beautiful month of May, Mother's Day is the ONE day a year when children, small and large, young and old, can show how much they love their mommy. The...
It's Mother's Day, the one day of the year when women get their well deserved recognition. We asked area mothers how they celebrated this special day. Here's what they had to say: Laura "I just had my first child six months ago. My husband gave me a bathroom scale and a membership to Curves, so I can lose that last ten pounds. I look forward to him taking interest in me again when I do."...
Supermarkets across America were the scene Saturday of knock-down, drag-out brawls over the last few packages of Blueberry Pancake Mix and frozen blueberry pancakes as children dragged their fathers, aunts, uncles and grandparents to the store to get...
Canadians are on the alert after reading Skoob1999's article about Bogus Mothers operating in UK on Mothers' Day. Mothers' Day in Canada isn't until May. A special squad is being trained, as I type. They have all read Skoob1999's article and, fe...
Norman Bates spent Mothers Day mainly talking to himself in his padded cell here, alternating between his own voice, and the voice of his murdered mother, which he puts on with creepy effect. Bates, who inspired real life serial killer Ed Gein, of...
The police today issued a warning to UK householders to beware of bogus mothers operating criminal scams on unwitting citizens on Mothers Day. The warning, which was issued way too late to be of any practical use whatsoever was issued after a numb...
London - (Rasputin Mess): An ominous bit of ectoplasm 'just like a sleepwalking Lady Macbeth' has emerged from the Queen's vagina sending terrified royal flunkies absolutely mental. The apparition was seen in the monarch's bedroom at close to midn...
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