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Funny satire stories about Michael Cohen

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Funny story: President Trump Denies That He Uses Preparation H on His Face

President Trump Denies That He Uses Preparation H on His Face

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) - President Trump was asked by a reporter with Fox News about Michael Cohen’s brand new book, which makes him look like the biggest racist predator and tax-evading liar in the entire world. He responded by saying t…

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Funny story: Michael Cohen’s New Tell-All Book on President Trump Will Have Him Squirming Like a Prostitute in Church

Michael Cohen’s New Tell-All Book on President Trump Will Have Him Squirming Like a Prostitute in Church

NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) - There is no book in the history of books, that will be read by more people than Michael Cohen’s expose on President Trump titled, “Disloyal – The Truth and Nothing But The Truth.” Cohen told CNN’s Anderson Cooper th…

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Funny story: Stormy Daniels Explains Why She Refers To Donald Trump as a Planetary Lover

Stormy Daniels Explains Why She Refers To Donald Trump as a Planetary Lover

LOS ANGELES – The woman who was paid $131,265 hush money by the President's attorney, Michael Cohen, has just revealed why she said that Donald J. Trump was a “Planetary Lover”. Stormy spoke with Vodka Vermicelli of iRumors, and told her that "Spa…

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Funny story: President Trump’s Long Time Lawyer and Friend Michael Cohen is Released From Prison

President Trump’s Long Time Lawyer and Friend Michael Cohen is Released From Prison

MANHATTAN – Michael Cohen, the attorney that Donald J. Trump called his “Fixer,” has just been released from the Otisville Correctional Facility. Cohen, aka #2190562, was released early, and many are saying that it is because POTUS was scared as h...

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Funny story: President Trump’s Long-Time Lawyer, Michael Cohen Caught Digging a Hole in His Prison Cell

President Trump’s Long-Time Lawyer, Michael Cohen Caught Digging a Hole in His Prison Cell

MADRID, New York – President Trump’s former attorney and well-documented ‘fixer,’ recently said that he is going stir-crazy sitting in his tiny prison cell at New York state's infamous Sang Sung Prison. Michael Cohen (aka #7803219) is so desperate...

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Funny story: Michael Cohen Says That He Is Ready To Spill The Beans on President Trump

Michael Cohen Says That He Is Ready To Spill The Beans on President Trump

MADRID, New York – The man who was Donald Trump’s personal attorney and so called “Fixer” for ten years, has just commented that he is ready to sing like Celine Dion. Michael Cohen said that he has had a lot of time to think, as he sat in his tiny...

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Funny story: Trump Orders Mueller Have His Gums Painted Purple For Lying

Trump Orders Mueller Have His Gums Painted Purple For Lying

BILLINGSGATE POST: Like a demented rat (genus Rattus) munching on cream cheese with rubber-tipped teeth, so that no one might hear him, Special Counsel Robert Mueller mealy-mouthed his way through two House committee hearings last week. Mueller,...

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Funny story: Trump Orders Cohen Have His Gums Painted With Gentian Violet For Lying

Trump Orders Cohen Have His Gums Painted With Gentian Violet For Lying

BILLINGSGATE POST: Ominously, the day began with the Four Horses of the Apocalypse peacefully munching oats in the White House stables; their teeth tipped with rubber so that they would not wake up Slim Everdingle from his troubled slumber. Slim was...

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Funny story: Grown Men Who Put Up "Liar Liar Pants on Fire" Poster in Congress Say Ocasio-Cortez is Crazy

Grown Men Who Put Up "Liar Liar Pants on Fire" Poster in Congress Say Ocasio-Cortez is Crazy

Washington - At a recent Congressional hearing, Republican Paul Gosar, who once said that climate change isn't real because of "photosynthesis", watched in horror as Congresswoman Alexandra Ocasio-Cortez asked former Trump lawyer Michael Cohen pertin...

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Funny story: Michael Cohen gets Hollywood Blvd Star

Michael Cohen gets Hollywood Blvd Star

Hollywood, CA. The Bored Directors - yes, that's what they call themselves - of the famed Hollywood Walk of Fame, voted today to place a star on the fabled sidewalk in recognition of Michael "Flip" Cohen's unequaled performance before House and Senat...

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Funny story: Nation Within Range of Unhinged Lunatic’s Nukes Says it's “Pretty Sure Trump Paid Porn Star”

Nation Within Range of Unhinged Lunatic’s Nukes Says it's “Pretty Sure Trump Paid Porn Star”

Washington - An entire country, under immediate danger from a completely deranged madman with an arsenal of nuclear missiles capable of taking out tens of millions of people, found itself glued to the television set as Michael Cohen, former lawyer an...

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Funny story: Michael Cohen: Sasha Made Me Sing Like A Canary

Michael Cohen: Sasha Made Me Sing Like A Canary

BILLINGSGATE POST: "When The Twilight Is Gone And No Songbirds Are Singing." But the songbirds were singing. Michael Cohen just performed acapella for James Mueller, or so he thought. Although both have the same surname, Michael and Sasha Bar...

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Funny story: “A Mighty Fortress Is Our Trump”

“A Mighty Fortress Is Our Trump”

For the Evangelicals Still Standing by Their Man A mighty fortress is our Trump, a bulwark ever flailing; our Savior he amid the flood, his moral ills prevailing. For still Trump’s dauntless foes do seek to work Him woe; their craft and power are great, and armed with cruel facts, on earth are not their equals. Did we in our own strength take pride, our striving would be b...

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Funny story: Michael Cohen uses "Trump defence" in court

Michael Cohen uses "Trump defence" in court

President Trump's former lawyer and "fixer" Michael Cohen has been charged on eight counts of fraud and other financial crimes, including tax evasion and paying off Stormy Daniels for having to sleep with the orange leader. Unusually, Cohen defend...

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Funny story: Special Counsel Releases More Tapes Recorded by Trump's Lawyer

Special Counsel Releases More Tapes Recorded by Trump's Lawyer

It was revealed that Trump's personal lawyer, Michael Cohen, whose office was raided by Special Prosecutor Mueller, has lots of secret tapes he recorded of him and Trump. Among the admissions are: 1. Trump is barely a millionaire, much less a billionaire. 2. When Eric was a baby they would leave him in the middle of nowhere but he always found his way back home. 3. Trump has a guy to twee...

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Funny story: It's My Party

It's My Party

With apologies to Leslie Gore It's my party and I'll lie if I want to Lie if I want to Lie if I want to You would lie too if it happened to you! Nobody knows where my lawyers have gone But Rudy came just in time. Why won’t he shut the fuck up When he's supposed to be mine? It's my party and I'll lie if I want to Lie if I want to Lie if I want to You would lie too if your wife had...

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Funny story: Trump Confesses: “Stormy....Best Sex I Never Had.”

Trump Confesses: “Stormy....Best Sex I Never Had.”

BILLINGSGATE POST: In 1990, the New York Post’s famous headline blared that Donald Trump’s ex-wife Marla Maple proclaimed the future president “the best sex I’ve ever had.” What the story conveniently omitted, perhaps by choice, is that Marla was a...

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