Communities Secretary, Robert Jenrick, (nope not a clue either), has defended the government's slightly changed Coronavirus message, saying:
"It couldn’t be clearer if it was a clear glass of smooth, sparkling Somerset water.
"Moving on from th...
Alex Wallbanger of Somerset, Kentucky says that if it hadn't been for the old rotary telephone he would have been in a mess.
After his wife, Nuggy, had went to work on the night shift and after they had had some fun in bed, Alex had gone to sleep.
The Fortunate Sun Fortune Cookie Company of Chinatown, in honor of The Chinese New Year, has just released its latest fortune cookie messages for 2011.
Hu Hu How, chief fortune cookie message writer, was born and raised in China. He attended the prestigious Chopsticks University in Shanghai where he met and married Suzi Yo Fung Chin, heiress to the Republican Rickshaw Company of Peking, China.
Osama Bin Laden, a family friend of the Bush family and one who lived in the USA for many years, and took cocaine with George W. Bush and dated hostesses there, today released his latest evil message from a cave in Outer Moronicamericanistan.
'People of the West', he said, in a suitable Hollywood 'bad beardy guy' accent, 'I will destroy you all! Only little children would believe in this messag...
A message in a bottle that was tossed into the ocean off Barnegat Bay in New Jersey has turned up in North Carolina -39 years later.
The note was sealed in a Schaefer beer bottle. It was dated Aug. 17, 1969 and reads:
"Like, whoever gets this...have a groovy day. This is no trash talk, man. I wish you the best, whoever and whenever, dude. We're cool here.
Enjoying our brown rice and b...
10. The phrase "go to Hell" is received as a message of hope...
Buenos Dias Senor, Como estas?...
The Tibetan Buddhist spiritual leader and living God is languishing in a Peruvian jail on charges of hit and run. Shocked Tibetan officials received the news by text message. It is thought that the Peruvian smoke signal machine had broken down after...
George W Bush was always going to narrowly win a second term in office - that was the message in the President's posterior.
President Bush said today that his record-low 42% approval rating "sends the wrong message to our troops" and accused unpatriotic poll respondents of trying to "weaken our resolve."
Bush would not rule out using the Patriot Act to "smoke out" thos...
And now a message from Wilford Brimley:
I’d like to speak to you a moment about a problem you’re probably just hoping will go away. I’m talking about Rectal Leakage and what you need to be doing about it.
You know the ones I mean. The ones that say "Hey, look at my boobs", then, as you're reading this message, you get slapped and verbally abused.
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