SOMEWHERE IN MAINE - (Satire News) - The Vox Populi News Agency has just named a retired molasses salesman, who resides in Maine, the nation's number one hermit. The 91-year-old man named Tobias Wickenweiser, has lived by himself in the middle of…
BANGOR, Maine – (Satire News) – Bangor’s Channel 91, Eye Spectator News TV, reports that a Connecticut woman named Loreen Yumbrella, 39, who lists her profession as an unemployed prostitute, has been arrested by officers with the Bangor Police Depart…
He said he would win the next election, and his plan has been put into motion: Occupy stronghold Democratic cities, deny their vote, win four more years! A sample city presently being occupied is Portland, in Oregon, not Maine. So, Trump’s unma…
BANGOR, Maine – The East Coast Meteorological Council has just issued a report that should strike fear in President Trump. The ECMC has said that an asteroid the size of Seattle is heading directly for Mar-a-Lago, Florida, Trump’s Southern White H...
Orono, Maine - Medical researchers at the University of Maine have discovered the long-sought cure for cancer. According to lead researcher Dr. Emma Kingston, the cure was so amazingly simple, they don't understand how someone didn't find it before...
BAR HARBOR, Maine - Purdue Skipbrewster, 51, has been fishing the waters of the Atlantic ocean for 29 years and in that time he has caught more than his share of sardines. In fact, back in 2007, Skipbrewster was named The Top Sardine Fisherman in...
WEST HOLLYWOOD - Mountain Peak Pictures in association with Gladiator Films has just announced that filming will soon start on the new Staccato Monteverdi political porn film Binders Full of Women. Monteverdi told Pomona Vox with Silver Screen Sho...
KENNEBUNK, MAINE (ABSNN) - "They were doing more than Zumba out of that 'dance studio,' let me tell ya," said Kennebunk Police Chief George H. W. P. Bush. "They was selling nookie," the chief told reporters. Police raided Purda Vida Fitness Cen...
KENNEBUNKPORT, Maine - The country singing sensation Taylor Swift was finally able to find a little time to take off from her hectic music concert tour and relax in the relaxing capital of New England the state of Maine. Swift and her brand new bo...
Reporting from the State of Maine. To get to Maine from Boston you must drive north on interstate 95. On the way stop in New Hampshire and pick up some bargain liquor. At least it seems to be bargain liquor prices until you add in the road tolls that subsidize the State Liquor Store. It may end up costing the same as at home, but you will be stocked up for the stay. In the interest of ke...
Downeast Mainers were left with dropped jaws over the weekend when their daily lives were constantly interrupted by armed security guards, and hi speed black limousines in convoy careening around the narrow laid back country lanes of Mt. Desert Islan...
When Barack Obama hit the first lady with the news that they were going to the Maine backwoods for a short little vacation, Michelle wasn't too enchanted with the idea. Sure, the idea of getting in some hiking, canoeing, and fishing was a great idea...
Secret Service agents descended on Bangor,Maine early this week, to make final security preparations at the "Tree Hugger Book Store" where Stephen King will be holding a book signing for his new nightmare thriller detailing the possible demise of the...
There was panic in the Maine tourist industry today with the news that President Barry Obama and his immaculate family were threatening to disrupt the entire Tourist Economy of Mt. Desert Island with a Presidential 'personal holiday' starting next we...
Maine Wild Life Officers were put on full alert after a rampaging herd of topless Maine women stampeded through the renovated downtown port city of Portland in a protest called "udderly ridiculous" by representatives of the Fraternal Order of the Mo...
Today in the state of Maine, a very unpopular bill was passed into law by a state congressional vote that could have voters casting new ballots in November. The new law placed a tax on the intimate moments between married couples. "They want to tr...
In an effort to add increased value to its already well-regarded customer service, the Freeport, Maine-based retailer L.L. Bean can now determine a customer's order before the customer gives the item number.
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