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Funny satire stories about Mafia

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Funny story: Three of The Country's Top Mafiosos Meet To Discuss Donald Trump

Three of The Country's Top Mafiosos Meet To Discuss Donald Trump

NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - The word on the streets of Brooklyn is that three of the underworld's top Mafia bosses met to discuss the situation regarding Donald Trump. The Cloud 9 News Agency is reporting that the three high-profile crime fam…

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Funny story: Climate Change is a Problem for Whacking

Climate Change is a Problem for Whacking

In the good old days, when the mafia owned Las Vegas, a wiseguy could whack an enemy, dump his body in a barrel and throw him into Lake Mead. It would take a long time and a lot of decomposition, before the body was found. If ever. Now that water…

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Funny story: The Pianissimo Mafia Family Opens Three Pizza Restaurants In Hackensack, New Jersey

The Pianissimo Mafia Family Opens Three Pizza Restaurants In Hackensack, New Jersey

HACKENSACK, New Jersey - (Satire News) - Ever since he was a little guy growing up in Sardinia, Italy, Genzano Pianissimo dreamed of two things; the first, he wanted to go to America and become a Mafioso, and secondly, he wanted to open up a pizza pa…

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Funny story: Business Report from Italy - The Mafia Have Programmed Computers to be Mafia

Business Report from Italy - The Mafia Have Programmed Computers to be Mafia

The Instittuto Baloney in Bologna, Italy, just came out with a report that those various branches of the Italian Mafia are using computers and AI to modernize their various evil business operations. A secret recording at a Mafia convention was q…

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Funny story: Salvatore Goombalini, The Head of The Notorious Goombalini Crime Family of Brooklyn Wants To Have a Nice LONG Talk With Ted "The Whining Wimp" Cruz

Salvatore Goombalini, The Head of The Notorious Goombalini Crime Family of Brooklyn Wants To Have a Nice LONG Talk With Ted "The Whining Wimp" Cruz

BROOKLYN, New York - (Satire News) - A reporter for The New York Sunshine Observer newspaper has broken the story that Salvatore Goombalini, head of the nortorious Goombalini crime family based in Brooklyn wants to have a heart-to-heart talk with one…

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Funny story: Mob-connected goose seeking revenge on well-meaning medics

Mob-connected goose seeking revenge on well-meaning medics

A staff member at a Cape Cod's Wildlife Center recently noticed Arnold, a goose who had developed a noticeable limp. He and some co-workers Canada Goose, set a trap and ambushed Arnold, bringing him to the Cape Cod Wildlife Center for an exam and tre…

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Funny story: Brooklyn Crime Family Member Garbanzo Goombalini Has Agreed To Run Against Marjorie Taylor Greene

Brooklyn Crime Family Member Garbanzo Goombalini Has Agreed To Run Against Marjorie Taylor Greene

BROOKLYN – (Satire News) – The head of an infamous Brooklyn crime family, Salvatore Goombalini, has just announced that he has chosen his younger brother Garbanzo Goombalini, to run against Marjorie Taylor Greene, who he calls one of the meanest, nas…

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Funny story: The Mafia Wants The Word “Mafioso” Sticken From The Dictionary

The Mafia Wants The Word “Mafioso” Sticken From The Dictionary

BROOKLYN – (Satire News) – Tittle Tattle Tonight reporter Pico de Gallo recently sat down with Goombalini crime family boss Salvatore Goombalini at a Pompous Pizza Parlor in Brooklyn. The two, who go way back to the days of the infamous Big Apple…

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Funny story: A Brooklyn Mafia Boss Says If President Trump Loses and Refuses to Vacate the White House, He Has Some Fellas Who Will Help Him Leave

A Brooklyn Mafia Boss Says If President Trump Loses and Refuses to Vacate the White House, He Has Some Fellas Who Will Help Him Leave

BROOKLYN – (Satire News) – Fox News is reporting that President Trump has said that, if he loses the election, he will simply refuse to vacate the White House. The so-called 'Fair and Balanced' network pointed out that the President remarked that…

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Funny story: Man Might Have Fallen Foul Of Mafia Crime Bosses

Man Might Have Fallen Foul Of Mafia Crime Bosses

Keeping one's head down and maintaining a low profile, especially when in a foreign country, is always a good idea, but one man thinks he may have overstepped his boundaries after he received an unexpected gift from an as-yet unknown benefactor. M...

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Funny story: Joe Bidet drums up votes in Sin City

Joe Bidet drums up votes in Sin City

Former Vice-President “Papa Joe” Bidet, mindful of the 2020 general election, visited Nevada to stake his future presidential bid on getting out the vote among illegal aliens, Antifa “protesters,” MS-13 gang members, and other “non-deplorables.” A...

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Funny story: Mafia Family Members Major in Turf Management

Mafia Family Members Major in Turf Management

New York City, NY - Local universities reported an uptick in popularity in Turf Management Studies, particularly for college applicants with Italian-American backgrounds. Students who major in turf management learn how to maintain the turf on sp...

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Funny story: Don Blatter denies he's the Godfather

Don Blatter denies he's the Godfather

Swiss Authorities today announced a criminal investigation into corrupt actvities by Sepp Blatter (known variously as 'The Don', "'Sepp The Tongue'and 'Sepptic'",  the President of world soccer governing body FIFA. From his heavily fortified famil...

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Funny story: The Dark Side of Premium Blenders

The Dark Side of Premium Blenders

Washington DC: The FBI has stated that it will begin to track sales of all premium home blender purchases, but the public will not be inconvinced in any way. Special Agent Martin Hanes stated that, "We're openly letting the public know this for the p...

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Funny story: New "Hire-A-Thug" Parking App is All The Rage!

New "Hire-A-Thug" Parking App is All The Rage!

San Francisco, CA - Ivor Putinski loves his new home in America, and wanted nothing more than to use his various talents to help improve the lives of the people in his newly adopted country. This inspired Ivor to develop his new "Hire-A-Thug" iPhone...

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Funny story: Pope Announces Sweeping Reforms

Pope Announces Sweeping Reforms

The Vatican is introducing sweeping reforms to its liturgical practice. Mass, benediction and special services, from now on, will be all-ticket affairs. The "pensio" as the ticket is called can be bought online. Marketing director for the Vatican...

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Funny story: FDA and EPA join forces to combat new death by aspartame study

FDA and EPA join forces to combat new death by aspartame study

Washington D.C. - As the United States Federal government is about to run out of cash, our sources report that the FDA and the EPA are about to re-launch aspartame as a vitamin. In the light of a recent study showing that aspartame kills women (...

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