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Funny satire stories about London 2012

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Funny story: Closing Ceremony in Crimea highlights Coalition failure

Closing Ceremony in Crimea highlights Coalition failure

David Cameron faced stern questioning during PMQs on Friday when asked to explain why, two years on, the Coalition government has yet to take full advantage of the London 2012 legacy. Stark comparisons have been drawn after Russia rode the wave of...

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Funny story: West Ham to quit playing football and take up athletics instead

West Ham to quit playing football and take up athletics instead

David Sullivan, pornagrapher-in-chief at Wet Sham United, have dramatically announced the club will no longer play football in an attempt to get the taxpayer funded Olympic Stadium and £40 million of free council tax money from Newham Council. Spe...

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Funny story: Queen's outrageous behaviour threatens monarchy

Queen's outrageous behaviour threatens monarchy

Highly sensitive information has emerged this week about an alleged 'altercation' between Dame Judi Dench and the Queen.'Serious concerns' about the Monarch's behaviour have been expressed by Prime Minister Dave (JammieDodger) Cameroon. Circumstances...

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Funny story: Air New Zealand ad goes 'balls to the wall'

Air New Zealand ad goes 'balls to the wall'

AUKLAND, New Zealand (ABSNN) - Air New Zealand aired a new "ballsy" ad featuring Belarusian Olympian Nadzeya Ostapchuk who won the London Games' shot-put competition, but was forced to surrender her Gold Medal when she failed a drug test. "The ad ca...

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Funny story: Olympic "Blades" Sprinter to Race Kangaroo

Olympic "Blades" Sprinter to Race Kangaroo

Sydney, Australia - Oscar Pistorius, the twenty-six-year-old South African sprinter, who ran in the London Olympics with "blades" instead of legs, has accepted a challenge to participate in a race that could give his bank account quite a bounce. P...

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Funny story: LA Galaxy to bid for London Olympic Stadium

LA Galaxy to bid for London Olympic Stadium

Major League Soccer side LA Galaxy have joined the bidding process to play at the Olympic Stadium in East London, England. They join bids from local football franchises West Ham United and Leyton Orient, plus one from Formula One chief Bernie Ecc...

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Funny story: Andy Murray thanks coach for US Open and Olympic triumph

Andy Murray thanks coach for US Open and Olympic triumph

Newly crowned US Open tennis champion Andy Murray last night thanked his coach, former 80s tennis star Ivan Lendl for his winning streak which saw Murray pick up a Gold medal for beating Roger Federer in the Olympic Tennis at Wimbledon, and today his...

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Funny story: Olympic chiefs extend length of 100 metres to maximise TV rights

Olympic chiefs extend length of 100 metres to maximise TV rights

Olympic bosses are secretly planning to extend the length of the 100 metres race to make more cash from TV broadcasting rights. As athletes continue to snip fractions off the winning time over recent years, broadcasters are offering less cash for...

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Funny story: V Festival performers refused permission to use Olympic Lanes

V Festival performers refused permission to use Olympic Lanes

Celebrity musician and X-Factor Chav, sorry Judge, was fuming today after being told she and her entourage could not use the Olympic Zil lanes to get from Stafford to Chelmsford to perform her new hit single on stage. The cousin of Dappy blew a fu...

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Funny story: Terrifying New Drug Sweeps Country

Terrifying New Drug Sweeps Country

A new sinister drug is sweeping the country, say government and police officials, and it is set to bring despair and misery to the population. The drug has swept in to every facet of our society, from the rich and well-to-do areas of Kent, to the...

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Funny story: Football Results & comments 15th August 2012

Football Results & comments 15th August 2012

International Friendlies England 2 Italy 1 England gained revenge for their Euro 2012 with a victory over the Azurri. The match was played in the Wankdorf Stadium in Berne, Switzerland. With a stadium name like that it's a surprise Wayne Rooney and John Terry weren't in the squad. Scotland 3 Australia 1 The Scots beat the mighty Australians to move up to 3rd in the Cricket World Rankings.

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Funny story: Tool catalogue people now in on act with Olympics

Tool catalogue people now in on act with Olympics

The makers of a popular little catalogue of working tools and accessories, have now got in on the act of trying to equate their products with the recent London Olympics. They have this morning released their new range of wall fixing accessories un...

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Funny story: Russell Brand Caught Tongue Wrestling With Kat Von D

Russell Brand Caught Tongue Wrestling With Kat Von D

HOLLYWOOD - Russell Brand is reportedly still upset that he was not invited to be a special guest of Queen Elizabeth II, during the Summer Olympics in London. Prior to the Olympics, Brand had bragged to his girlfriend Kate Gosselin that he was cer...

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Funny story: Fate of Olympic Stadium decided - could Tesco be taking over?

Fate of Olympic Stadium decided - could Tesco be taking over?

In a dramatic move announced today a supermarket in partnership with TV personality Dale Winton, will be taking over the Olympic Stadium used in the recent London Olympics. The left side of the stadium will become one of the popular shops (open 7.

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Funny story: Duran Duran upset at not being included in the closing ceremony

Duran Duran upset at not being included in the closing ceremony

Popular notorious eighties beat combo, Duran Duran, have said that they are quite upset at not being included in the closing ceremony for the Olympics, with the whole of Planet Earth watching just before sunrise. "Is there something I should know,...

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Funny story: Mayor of London admits to mistake in London 2012 Olympics Closing Ceremony

Mayor of London admits to mistake in London 2012 Olympics Closing Ceremony

Floppy haired part-time 'Night-Mayor of London' Morris Johnson today admitted to close friends to a string of errors in the London 2012 Closing Ceremony. The cloth-eared Mayor, who has continually embarrassed the Capital since wrangling the job f...

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Funny story: George Michael "Still Got It", apparently.

George Michael "Still Got It", apparently.

George Michael triumphantly returned in a blaze of abject failure last night at the Olympic Closing Ceremony. After performing a relatively appropriate song - Freedom, Michael decided to perform new material. Shit material. Which was completely lo...

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