A rabbi in Kentucky has been arrested by agents with the DEA. A spokesperson for the DEA stated that Rabbi Myron Myronowitz III, 43, was caught in a back holler outside of the town of Woodchuck Hormones, Kentucky. Rabbi Myron's 2020 Toyota Reno Ro…
The Kentucky Legislature, with a supermajority of Republicans, is proposing a law that every citizen’s birth date, from (the Bill in part reads) “the year of our Lord 2024, shall be set at the moment of conception.” Opponents to the Republican B…
This just in for churches in Kentucky and Tennessee and other “kiss my grits” states … preachers, pastors, reverends, and whatever else Christian clergy call themselves, will no longer be allowed to wear religious vestments of any kind … due to a new…
A Senator from Kentucky, who prefers to remain nameless and without a conscience, has proposed a new bill to make crucifix tattoos mandatory on all people, including children, right on their foreheads. If you do not have this tattoo, you may be su…
NASTY NOOKY, Kentucky - (Satire News) - United American News reports that lots of the state's hillbillies are taking advantage of the sizzling hot temps. Lottie Bungalow with UAN said that she spoke to several of the country folk who she noted wer…
Kentucky has finally made abortion illegal, as God and Baby Jesus meant for it to be. Now incest can thrive and return backwoods hillbillies to the numbers they once enjoyed during their heyday. “How come I cain’t screw ma daughter?” one native K…
FRANKFORT, Kentucky – (Satire News) – The governor of Kentucky, has just issued a Governor’s Mandate mandating that effective immediately the practice of rinsing out used condoms and reusing them will be stopped. Gov. Andy Beshear, stated to the p…
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – Sparks flew all over the place at the latest Delta Dawn Virus Senate Hearing when President Biden’s Chief Medical Director Dr. Anthony Fauci lit into Senator Rand Paul, and literally turned the Kentucky hillbilly in…
LAKE LIBIDO, Kentucky – (Sports Satire) – The Horse of a Different Color Thoroughbred Racing Conglomerate has just announced that their 2-year-old filly, TikTok, has just been named the fastest horse in the United States. Conglomerate CEO Silus P.
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – The iRumors News Agency has just reported that, after first insisting that he is as fit as Donald Trump, Mitch McConnell has come clean. He has admitted that the bruises, purple hands, Band-Aids, nose cast, and b…
SKUNK SPRAY, Kentucky - (Satire News) – TMZ recently spoke with Senator Addison Michelle McConnell, and the senator revealed what 97% of all Americans already knew. McConnell, who is 78, but looks 98, finally admitted that yes, he is indeed “Trump…
FRANKFORT, Kentucky – Senator Mitch McConnell has just been informed that his alma mater has voted to take down his his statue. McConnell, who is worth $30 million, expressed disbelief, and asked on what grounds was the statue being removed. Th…
CHICAGO – The more that Donald Trump speaks, the more that the Electoral College winner sticks his size 13 shoe in his ever-lying mouth. Three anti-Trump Republican groups are promising to make sure that the Tweet Creep becomes a one-term presiden...
LOUISVILLE – It was a foregone conclusion that this year’s edition of the annual Kentucky Derby horse race would be cancelled due to the Coronavirus pandemic. But derby racing officials have hit upon a way to actually run the traditional event.
SONORA, Kentucky – The thoroughbred horse racing industry is amazed at a 2-year-old stallion that literally runs like the wind, as they say up in Chicago. The horse, named Witch Hunt, has entered ten races and has won each one. And won by an avera...
OLE PLAYING POSSUM, Ky. - Donald Trump is starting up a small industry in this small Kentucky town, once a coal mining center for the local area. About a decade ago, 300 high-paying coal mining jobs were lost here and the small village has seen bette...
The announcement by the FDA on Wednesday morning has sent a shock wave through the U.S. fast food industry and startled even its most loyal consumer base. The discovery, hidden in near plain sight within KFC's supply chain, has shaken the very t...
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