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Funny satire stories about Julian Assange

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Funny story: Tucker Carlson extradited to Belmarsh Prison

Tucker Carlson extradited to Belmarsh Prison

So far there has been no confirmation that Mr. Carlson has been placed in a cell at Belmarsh Prison next to Julian Assange. White House Press Secretary Jenifer Psaki has said, “There are no such plans. At this time.” Mr. Carlson continues to br…

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Funny story: Julian Assange – Wikileaks Leaker Begs President Biden To Please Give Him a Pardon

Julian Assange – Wikileaks Leaker Begs President Biden To Please Give Him a Pardon

LONDON – (Satire News) – The man who leaked more leaks in the history of leaking is now begging President Biden to help get him out of jail. Julian Assange, who is 49, but who is now looking more like 69, told Loretta Piffinshaw, with England’s Ta…

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Funny story: Snowden, Assange agree to meet in boxing match

Snowden, Assange agree to meet in boxing match

International bad boys Edward Snowden ex-CIA analyst and Julian Assange founder of Wikileaks have agreed to meet in the boxing ring in what is bound to be a very evenly matched contest, featuring two very wily and clever phenoms of the modern world.

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Funny story: Wikileaks Founder Julian Assange Begs Trump to Pardon Him

Wikileaks Founder Julian Assange Begs Trump to Pardon Him

LIVERPOOL, England – The founder of Wikileaks and Pipileaks, Julian Assange, texted President Trump and begged him to please give him a Presidential Pardon so he can get out of prison before he hurts himself with a bar of soap. Assange has used up…

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Funny story: Bloomberg and DNC surge to top of 2020 IYF trophy contest

Bloomberg and DNC surge to top of 2020 IYF trophy contest

After twenty years of increasingly flagrant in your face activity from personnel related to US politics, the IYF Trophy has become one of the most popular awards among the ruling elites. The “in your face” title for this award indicates increasing...

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Funny story: Bolton flees to Canada claiming Assange as precedent

Bolton flees to Canada claiming Assange as precedent

Insider sources indicate Mr. Bolton is claiming he is in the position of Julian Assange, currently languishing in Belmarsh Prison, London. Mr. Bolton was spotted in a Continental Trailways bus entering Canada at the Detroit-Windsor border wearing...

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Funny story: Assange removal program fully explained

Assange removal program fully explained

There ARE laws against many actions, which citizens here and there around the world may be unaware of. *If a company leaves its manual for how to create a product lying around on the sidewalk, you must not pick it up and sell it to one of that com...

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Funny story: Sweden drops case against Assange; Arbuthnot replaced with new lot

Sweden drops case against Assange; Arbuthnot replaced with new lot

Recent news on the Assange case indicates that Judge Emma Arbuthnot has recused herself as Mr. Assange’s prosecutor on the grounds of conflict of interest. Just a few days back, Sweden dropped its rape case charges against Assange for the third ti...

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Funny story: Encylopedia of Pretexts for Politics and Business due out by Christmas on Amazon dot com

Encylopedia of Pretexts for Politics and Business due out by Christmas on Amazon dot com

This newly-established encyclopedia already shows massive pre-sales, with release date December 24. It bears an array of acknowledgements on its title page: “Fascism is the cockroach of contemporary politics—even a nuclear war will not kill it!...

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Funny story: CNN to receive Horace S Ball award for distinguished journalism no malarkey

CNN to receive Horace S Ball award for distinguished journalism no malarkey

The Horace S. Ball Foundation has awarded its prized annual trophy to CNN. This distinguished trophy honors Horace Shinola Ball, of the previous century. In making its selection, The Foundation directed its attention to the following. A re...

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Funny story: Epstein already working on groundbreaking provisions for his next jail time

Epstein already working on groundbreaking provisions for his next jail time

Confined at this time without bail, Mr. Epstein is reported already feverishly at work with his lawyers. At issue is the question of what conditions will attend his imprisonment--if he is once again sentenced to jail time. In his previous confi...

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Funny story: UK ambassador to be sent to Belmarsh Prison with cell next to Julian Assange

UK ambassador to be sent to Belmarsh Prison with cell next to Julian Assange

Striking new memoranda have stirred world leaders, always sensitive about their leadership prowess. Disclosures from UK’s Ambassador to the US, Sir Kim Darroch, leaked via Isabel Oakeshott of The Daily Mail, indicate just what he thinks of the Tru...

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Funny story: Mohammed Bin Salman and team incoming to Belmarsh

Mohammed Bin Salman and team incoming to Belmarsh

UK authorities have been pleased to announce further assistance on its most famous inmate at Belmarsh Prison, Julian Assange. Saudi Arabia’s MBS arrived yesterday, smiling, with a hand-picked team. These assistants have recently been identified...

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Funny story: Sajid Javid’s “rightly behind bars” inspires new sentencing for Assange at 400 years

Sajid Javid’s “rightly behind bars” inspires new sentencing for Assange at 400 years

British Home Secretary Sajid Javid’s remark that Julian Assange is “rightly behind bars” has led to further developments on "how long?" Mr. Javid signed a US extradition request, followed by disclosure that Mr. Assange faces 17 charges and 175 yea...

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Funny story: Assange Additionally Charged with Injuring Government Lamp

Assange Additionally Charged with Injuring Government Lamp

Not shying away from applying antiquated and little-used statutes in the interest of protecting the United States government from the actions of journalists, federal prosecutors have added a 19th count to the 18-count indictment against Wikileaks fou...

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Funny story: British Magistrate Gives Assange a Stern F-ing Warning After Sentencing

British Magistrate Gives Assange a Stern F-ing Warning After Sentencing

LONDON- Julian Assange appeared in a British court on Thursday where he was sentenced to 50 weeks for bail-jumping. Aside from the matter of extradition to the United States, Assange was given a "stern fucking warning'' by a Westminster magistrate...

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Funny story: Ecuadorian Embassy Turned Into Julian Assange's Own Dirty F-ing Art Studio

Ecuadorian Embassy Turned Into Julian Assange's Own Dirty F-ing Art Studio

Ecuadorian officials just simply had enough of Julian Assange's "artistic endeavors". "Assange said that he was making art in the spirit of conceptual artistic great, Piero Manzoni. At first the staff found it to be intellectually challenging and...

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