Puffing through his foreign policy address, while holding onto the podium with one hand, Donald Trump appeared to wheeze out his declaration that Hillary Clinton did not have the stamina or temperament to be president. Shifting hands, one always g...
While the last best hope of stopping Donald Trump's run for the White House was defined as "Lucifer in the flesh," by former House Majority leader John Boehner, Mr. Boehner added, (as though calling him 'Lucifer in the flesh' wasn't bad enough) "He'...
WHAT A WEEK! [After his masterful leadership of the House of Representatives in passing a funding bill for the Department of Homeland Security, Speaker John Boehner grants an interview to a roomful of reporters from around the world.] Al Jazeera: Mr. Speaker, wouldn't you say that a legislative body that can only pass a one-week funding bill is dysfunctional? Boehner: Not at all. In fact...
A Rathskeller deep in the forested woods. Night has drawn its blackest curtain across the outer world, blocking out even the niggardly light from the stars. Rain hammers against the windows and lightning cackles in the air. A troupe of men with faces that seek the shadows meet in a corner booth away from the gazes of the other inn patrons. They speak in cautious whispers that they wish no other...
Last Fall, North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Un became enraged with the United States due to the upcoming release of the movie "The Interview." It has long been rumored that the dictator personally called President Obama to express his outrage, but until now the details of their conversation have never been revealed. Thanks to a secret North Korean source we are now able to publish a transcri...
Washington, DC - Disgraced NAACP leader, Rachel Dolezal, who was fired last month for being a secret whitey, didn't take long to get her life heading in a newish direction. It turns out that she quickly found an equally-minded friend in John Boehner,...
WASHINGTON -- Republican leaders are engaging in a bit of their own "March Madness" in criticizing President Obama for picking the number one ranked and undefeated Kentucky Wildcats to win the NCAA men's basketball championship instead of GOP favorit...
WASHINGTON, DC - Speaker of the United States House of Representatives, John Boehner, filed a petition with the Municipal Court of West Chester Township, Ohio today to legally change his name. The petition, prepared by Mr. Boehners attorney, Mike...
WASHINGTON, D.C.-Security guards at the Capitol on Tuesday found Rep. John Boehner, Sen. Mitch McConnell, and Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu having sexual congress in one of its bathrooms, only minutes before the Prime Minister of Israel gave his...
Washington, DC - - With the Department of Homeland Security increasingly being used as a political football, Congress has come up with a backup plan. It's a domestic defensive strategy that relies on the American public to protect itself agai...
The President of Israel, Netan-YAHOO, has given his talk today at the American Congress. His coming to America has been a bone of contention between the Republicans and Democrats (what else is new?) as Netan-YAHOO was not invited by President Obama but rather by Speaker of the House John Boehner, a breach of normal U.S. international protocol unless of course you want to piss off the President and...
New York Harbor - - Demolition crews completed the final stages of dismantling the Statue of Liberty today. The salvage teams were following orders issued by the Republican Congress, which voted that the 129-year old symbol of freedom was on the wron...
President Bareass Obummer is "hotter than a steaming pile of sh*t," according to Beltway insiders. "He's absolutely fuming!" What has the presidential bowels in such an uproar? Speaker of the House John Boner had the "audacity" to invite Israel...
WHITEWASHINGTON, DC -- Former pugilist Senator Hairy Reed (D-NV) gave himself a black eye while shadow boxing in his Washington, DC gym last week. "As Senate Majority Leader Mitch MacConman, Speaker of the House John Boner, and other Republicans k...
WASHINGTON D.C. - After a tense vote today, House Speaker John Boehner was re-elected to a third term as Speaker of the House. A number of Republicans voted for someone else to take over the position and it was the biggest push for a Speaker chan...
Last Thursday the US House of Representatives passed resolution HR 758 criticizing Russia on Ukraine. It passed 411-10. Yesterday the House passed a new resolution to congratulate itself on Thursday's success. This new resolution, HR 758b, is...
Senator Ted Crap (R-TX) this week has called President Obama a "dictator" and GOP House Speaker Boner termed him an "emperor" over his executive order to shield 4 million undocumented immigrants from deportation. Senator Crap said that Obama is "J...
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