On Tuesday morning, the residents of Compton were astounded to discover that the Utah monolith had appeared on their beach. The monolith that vanished from Utah, only to appear in Romania, arrived on Tuesday morning, appearing against the World Fa…
In some exciting news, the Isle of Wight has been selected by the UK Government to act as a testbed for the new UK Covid-19 Tracing App. This marvellous technology will allow the IOW to re-open for business by using phones to track where everybody...
The winter nights may be drawing in, but usually, on the Isle of Wight, it's still all systems go at this time of year, writes Tourism, Graeco-Roman Wrestling, Permaculture, Snuff, Pest Control, Differential Topology and Gynaecology correspondent, No...
Councillor for Cowes, Mr David Pugh, has vowed that the Isle of Wight is to secede from the UK due to a row over the new Pound coin, however, he is keen to stress that this has nothing to do with Brexit. Island residents prefer the coins from 193...
A family from Ventnor are trying to sue 2017 for being too modern. "There's a natural order in the universe," said father of two, Dick Womble. "And that's the order ordained by God." According to Mr Womble, the invention of indoor plumbing, su...
High tech blade-less wind farms, the brain child of Isle of Wight inventor Johnny Dyson are to be erected around the Isle of Wight's vegetarian refugee camps. The wind farms, designed to extract the spent air from around the vegetarian New Age se...
"Centrifuges" siezed by customs officers on the Isle of Wight ferry were discovered to be old fashioned washing machines bound for the HMP Isle of Wight prisons it was claimed this morning. The Hotpoint Super-Swirl twin tub machines were thought...
Canada, recently twinned with the Isle of Wight, may boast Wonderland, with its exhilarating collection of rides and roller coasters, but it is to be put in the shade by the proposed Smuggler Experience park planned for next season on the Isle of Wig...
The Manager of a Motorway Services Station near Scunthorpe has banned the "Weirdo Club Of Great Britain" annual outing from entering the premises this year after complaints from "normal" customers last year that the club members were not weird enough...
The Greek government is refusing to comment on reports that it has bought "The Needles", a major tourist attraction with its own Chili Dog stall and cable car system. The attraction, stolen last week from the Isle of Wight, turned up at a famous...
A plea has gone out from the Isle Of Wight Tourist Office, warning people not to take unofficial souvenirs home following the loss of a major tourist attraction. The remains of "The Needles" were smuggled out in a white van sometime yesterday accordi...
A pill which cures prisoners of the urge to commit crimes is to be given to all inmates of H.M.P Isle of Wight. The pill's effects, which although it has to be administered daily, mean that all prisoners will remain completely law abiding as long as...
The controversial International Pavement Car Race is to be held on the Isle of Wight in February, despite fears of injuries and deaths as the racers hurtle around public pavements. The event could potentially become the most prestigious pavement vehi...
The Fungus Awards is an annual European awards ceremony honouring fungus related achievements in the mould and putrefaction industry. Winners are awarded the coveted golden mushroom statuette. The awards, first presented in 1929 at the Grand Hotel Bu...
The Isle of Wight has fallen foul of E.U. regulations by being above the mandatory 65 mile maximum length for a British Isle. The Isle, famous for its Rock Festivals and sequence dancing has steadfastly refused to lop 2 miles from its length, even th...
The new flagship £5000 Isle of Wight Bembridge airport terminal is to be named T.8 in an official ceremony tomorrow according to leaked documents. The product of ten years of planning, expensive ground breaking engineering achievements and dogged det...
The Isle of Wight has yet another world record to add to the burgeoning collection of records held in Newport Town hall, when it was discovered that the World's Largest Mole Hill has been discovered in Merstone. "Not many people visit Merstone," s...
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