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Trump To Command Military Expedition Against ISIS

Funny story: Trump To Command Military Expedition Against ISIS

In November 2015 Donald Trump said, "I know more about ISIS than the generals do. Believe me." In that same year Mr. Trump stated, "I always felt that I was in the military" because of his education at a military-themed boarding school. He said his...

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Newest flatworm to be named after Giuliani

Funny story: Newest flatworm to be named after Giuliani

Last week, a new species of flatworm discovered in Malaysia was named after President Barack Obama as Baracktrema obamai. The scientist making this designation, Thomas R. Platt, chose Mr. Obama, a distant relative, and a person Mr. Platt admires.

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Theresa May's Inaugural Speech Leaked

Funny story: Theresa May's Inaugural Speech Leaked

Theresa May in anticipation of becoming Britain's next Prime Minister sent a copy of her inaugural speech to her friend Hillary Clinton which is how we managed to get it. Here it is in full. "Mister Speaker, honourable ladies and gentlemen. There...

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Costs-Benefits Luncheon on Capitol Hill... Obama.

Funny story: Costs-Benefits Luncheon on Capitol Hill... Obama.

Yesterday, President Obama looking resplendent in tux and bow delivered the following address to a select group of financial experts, bankers and Congressmen at a luncheon held at Capitol Hill Washington. Here is part of his address. "Seven thous...

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NBC Announces Bizarre Deal With Brian Williams

Funny story: NBC Announces Bizarre Deal With Brian Williams

Trying to stay hip and relevant, NBC released late last night via Twitter and Instapoop, (their latest news flushing service,) that they have reached an all binding deal with Brian Williams, in what seems to be a winner-take-all bid to retain the new...

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Prezident Obummer weighs in on ISIS' destruction of Nimrod

Funny story: Prezident Obummer weighs in on ISIS' destruction of Nimrod

ISIS has built or purchased, "from parties unknown," a time machine and is traveling into Iraq's "ancient past," to destroy the Assyrian city of Nimrod, the United Nations recently whined. "We are heartbroken," archaeologists sniffed, "and outrage...

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ISIS to produce "Glee" inspired web series

Funny story: ISIS to produce "Glee" inspired web series

Mosul, Iraq-New video released by the Islamic State today details the next step in ISIS' battle for the hearts and minds of idiots throughout the middle east. Known for their slickly produced videos and their command and use of social media to ex...

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NBC issues memo: "Thou shalt not lie" (or, at least, get caught at it)

Funny story: NBC issues memo: "Thou shalt not lie" (or, at least, get caught at it)

In the wake of Bri Willyums' spurious reports of the helicopter in which he was traveling having been shot down by Iraqi soldiers during his reporting of the war in 2003 and his lying about--that is, his "mistaken accounts" of--seeing...

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Chilly Report Leaked

The Chilly Report, an investigation into the Middle East war from the early 2000s, has been five years in the writing and is almost ready for release. Your fearless reporter has managed to obtain a copy of the final version of the Chilly Report wh...

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ISIS Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi holds secret meeting in Mosul to consider new avenues on to the world stage

Funny story: ISIS Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi holds secret meeting in Mosul to consider new avenues on to the world stage

In a stunning development that bodes well for world peace as we approach this Christmas time, world famous football team Manchester United has revealed a recruiting drive aimed at Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, head of ISIS. A representative of Manchester...

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ISIS expands oil business to include gas stations with cafes plus religious services at the barbecue out back

Funny story: ISIS expands oil business to include gas stations with cafes plus religious services at the barbecue out back

Current reports indicate ISIS is not only looking for managers for its oil refineries, with a $225,000 annual salary, but also establishing a chain of gas stations across the middle east. The name CALron is being considered, inspired by Chevron,...

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ISIS Re-Names Itself S.H.I.T.

Funny story: ISIS Re-Names Itself S.H.I.T.

As the United States-led battle against radical forces rages in Iraq and Syria, a new linguistic front is emerging. Muslim groups in Europe and beyond are lashing out at the Islamic State in protests and on social media, advocating alternative ways...

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New Iraqi PM 'a dead ringer for NCIS baddie Trent Kort'

Funny story: New Iraqi PM 'a dead ringer for NCIS baddie Trent Kort'

Tehran, Iran - The editor of Iran's official NCIS fanzine website has welcomed the appointment of new Iraqi PM Haider al-Abadie on satirical grounds. Ayatollah Akbar Hashemi 'Rough Son Johnny' Rafsanjani said today the Iraqi was probably chosen b...

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Obama Refuses Air Strikes And Instead Turns Off Porn Access to Combat ISIS in Iraq

Funny story: Obama Refuses Air Strikes And Instead Turns Off Porn Access to Combat ISIS in Iraq

In a controversial move for the president of the United States, often criticised as being cautious in acting in the Middle East, today he decided to switch off all transmission of adult pornography to any radical groups in Northern Iraq. Under siege...

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Obama Orders Air Force to go on Strike

Funny story: Obama Orders Air Force to go on Strike

PERSIAN GULF - On the USS George HW Bush, United States military personnel have gone on general strike. Picket signs were seen as navy airmen locked hands around their aircraft. "1, 2, 3, 4, better pay for better war; 5, 6, 7, 8, management we...

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ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi makes shocking confession in rogue Mosul nightclub The Burqa al-Ablah

Funny story: ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi makes shocking confession in rogue Mosul nightclub The Burqa al-Ablah

No sooner was I back in Baghdad from the journey to Mosul with Hillary than I got this strange call on my cell. I was at my favorite cheap digs, the Hotel Alzubra, ready to move back towards Syria, but it was Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi saying I should return north to Mosul. "If this is Warezabar," the voice said, "I have something. Urgent." "This is Pepe Warezabar." "Yes?" His English is...

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Hillary Clinton at Club Ali Baba and His Forty Daughters for meeting with ISIS in Iraq

Funny story: Hillary Clinton at Club Ali Baba and His Forty Daughters for meeting with ISIS in Iraq

Pepe Warezabar here, just returned to Baghdad, and speaking into my laptop after rendezvous in Mosul with Hillary and the leader of ISIS. On the way there, yes, it was the orange Honda with plenty of dust, thank the bejeezus, me with pedal to the metal and Hillary in black burqa and wraparounds. Was she nervous? Who wasn't. Look, those claw marks on my right forearm could have come from anyw...

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Hillary Clinton secretly enters Iraq to assess ISIS and begin pre-presidential negotiations

Funny story: Hillary Clinton secretly enters Iraq to assess ISIS and begin pre-presidential negotiations

In burqa and nijab, with her signature dark wraparounds, presidential candidate Hillary Clinton recently entered Iraq as part of her presidential campaign. No simple drop in and out with flak jacket, HRC slipped into Iraq and drove north from Bagh...

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Breaking news…

Trump Sorry For 'Horseface' Tweet

Trump apologizes to Stormy Daniels for calling her 'horseface' in a
tweet. Tweet was actually meant for Kelly Ann Conway.
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