A man who was sleeping in his bed in the Thai capital of Bangkok, became alarmed when a stabbing pain in his penal column caused him to sit bolt upright and shout: "Aaaaaagh! Fuuuckinellll!" Moys Kenwood, 52, had returned home from work in a st...
For millenia, humans have had to contend with annoying insects buzzing and biting and crawling amongst us. From wasp stings to spiders in the bath, from bed bugs to flies everywhere. Finally, the war is nearing an end. Reports from around the worl...
The world is still recovering from a shock caused by the latest scientific report claiming that all insects may be extinct by the end of the century, which will result in a collapse of the planetary ecosystem. In an effort to plant a seed of opti...
Living in a hectic world in which many pride themselves on being so busy that there’ll be “no flies resting on them” has made for rather a tough row to hoe for Nashville fly, Freddie Diptera. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m busy, too,” said Freddie. "I'...
The House of Commons is to be fumigated after a Rees-Mogg was discovered in the main chamber. Although only one of the insectoids was found, it is thought to be part of a breeding pair. Rees-Moggs are a member of the genus Privilegius Conservatus,...
In the very first case of its kind, a man in Battambang has discovered a millipede that actually has what its name suggests it should have - 1,000 legs! Moys Kenwood, 55, was in his bathroom taking a dump, when a chance glance at the floor, mid-c...
Spanish footballers are reportedly terrified of the nasty looking Creepy Crawlies that live in Brazil's World Cup grass. From an early age Spanish footballers have seen Daddy Long Legs in Spanish grass, which is similar to Rain Forest grass. Supe...
Los Angeles, CA (STT News) - People of the world - learn to like bugs. That's the message recently released by Dr. Falter O. Longer, director of the USC's Elitist Longevity Institute. The study by the institute states clearly that things like meat,...
NORFOLK, Virginia - Snails have been around just about as long as flies, spiders, and pill bugs, but unlike those three insects the number of snails has decreased by 37 percent in just the past three years. Insect experts state that this is due to...
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Vice-President Joe Biden has just made an announcement to the White House Press Corps. He said that he was told by the White House gardener that every single tree located on The White House grounds is infested with the pesky, no...
A team of scientists at France's Lyons University has found that houseflies, just like humans, fall in love and live in twosomes. Unlike humans though who often remarry after the death of a spouse, houseflies find the loss of a partner so immense...
Washington DC: The US Fish and Wildlife Service (USFWS) has placed the Tasmanian termite on the endangered species list (ESL). These little buggers have illegally emigrated from Australia. Tasmanian termites, which are quite rare, are known as the...
College Station, Texas - This week is predicted to be the hottest week in Texas on record. While it would be a great thing normally to be considered hot, in a sexual way, it is not great to be living in one of the worst heat waves in twenty year...
Neurologists at Northern Michigan University have released a study that confirms the ability to capture the final brain activity of most insects at the moments just before death. Working predominantly with Black Flies, a species that can outnumbe...
Puzzled evolutionists are getting splinters in their fingers as they scratch their heads at science' latest finding. An insect known as a 'treehopper' has decided to turn back the clock, and grow three sets of wings!!!! Evolutionists tell the s...
Nature, at the very beginning, gave horse a forelock to swish away flies and insects. She, also, gave the horse a tail to constantly whisk away the blood sucking horse-flies from his sensitive testicles. Moreover, she granted the horse the ability to "shiver" the skin to get rid of flies landing on his body. Of course, man has supplemented nature's insufficiencies, such as 'fly repelling b...
My name is Trent Dementia and by pure chance I discovered that Red Fire Ants have intelligence. This may sound incredible but it's true and after you've read my story, you'll believe it too. Every morning around sunrise, I travel by foot to a salvage yard in north Las Vegas , Nevada . The journey only takes me an hour or so but along the way I explore the surrounding desert and all the magnific...
The Price Of Blasphemy - I didn't return to the battle grounds where the backsliders had revolted against my divine authority for about six months. I wasn't going to return there at all but I had a change of heart. I don't know if it was my compassion or my love for the little ones that drove my thoughts and made me return but one day I did stop by to see if the Red Fire Ants had repented of their...
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