I never trust anybody named George. George Washington was a terrorist insurgent with wooden teeth and an axe behind his back, ready and waiting to kill, kill, KILL! George HW Bush started the First Gulf War to make himself not look like a wimp,…
Mitch McConnell, after much research, has revealed that George Washington, Thomas Jefferson and Benjamin Franklin, all their lives, carried concealed loaded flintlock pistols in their pants, and had advanced, specially made, multiply firing muskets i…
There are calls for New York Governor Andrew Cuomo to resign or be impeached. Not exactly a choice between Ice cream or pie, but that's the dessert that's being offered up to the Governor. He could say no to both choices and sit it out like Trump…
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) - President Trump recently met with Kellyanne Conway and Eric Trump about possibly having his likeness added to Mount Rushmore. Kellyanne stated that she could not think of a more deserving individual. Eric replie…
CLEVELAND – (Satire News) - Members of the BLM movement have made it abundantly clear that they want the picture of George Washington, the man who owned 124 slaves, taken off the one-dollar bill. They say that the Jewish community would not like i…
After confirmation, on Monday, that the Washington Redskins were to, finally, ditch their name, there was a rush amongst fans to suggest a new one. Redskins owner, Dan Snyder, who had originally said that he would "never" change the name, or his m…
As the tidal wave of race equality surges on, gathering pace and momentum, it's been revealed that very name of the capital, itself, is in the sights of the Black Lives Matter movement, and, some might say, with good cause. Washington, DC, was nam…
July 4th, Independence Day, and Donald Trump vows to beat the radical left. Over two hundred years ago (Donald Trump is already asleep), the radical left was led by a guy named George Washington. He had a group of friends. They were making a heck...
Police and emergency services in the Black Hills, South Dakota, were called out to deal with potential casualties this morning, after an incident at Mount Rushmore left the world-famous site reduced to a pile of rubble. The location is known for t…
DETROIT – A spokesperson for the BLM organization, which now has over 4 million members, including 37,000 whites, has just informed the media that two out of the four presidents on Mount Rushmore were slave owners. George Washington, the nation’s…
It's been announced in the last few minutes, that police in the Black Hills have apprehended and arrested a man carrying a quantity of dynamite in the area of Mount Rushmore. The man was said by witnesses to be a Native American indian, and looked…
BILLINGSGATE POST: First it was Confederate generals. Next it was Christopher Columbus and Junipero Serra. Revisionist wackos are now talking about nuking Mount Rushmore, where the busts of Washington, Jefferson, Lincoln and Teddy Roosevelt were ca...
“George Washington never looked so good,” both Melania Trump and Michael “Michelle” Obummer agreed, after seeing the first U.S. president "up close and personal." "I knew he was tall," Michael said, "but I had no idea he was that big. I think he m...
A writer on the satirical news website TheSpoof.com has revealed how he 'aches' to write a story on US politics, but is prevented from doing so by his complete lack of knowledge on the subject. Moys Kenwood, 54, says he knows who Donald Trump is,…
WASHINGTON, DC - President Barack Obama issued an executive order today, directing US Secretary of the Treasury. Jack Lew, to replace George Washington with Harriet Tubman on the dollar bill. Harriet Tubman (1822 - 1913) was a black abolitionist,...
Since Pope John Paul 11 began the foundation work of building a One World Religion, the Jesuits, in obeyance to their current leader Pope Francis have been hard at work. In a significant move to bring Protestant and Catholic churches together it w...
The History of the U.S. is being rewritten by a Chicago drug dealer who discovered that spinning his copy of the record 'Heart's Desire' by groove legend Don Blackman opens a wormhole allowing him to travel back in time to the late 18th Century. S...
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