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Funny satire stories about Funeral

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The highly dangerous funeral plan

Many funeral companies are now using the internet as a means to boost flagging businesses. They give the impression of concern about the high cost of funerals in general, and that they are giving the aged peace of mind by offering a supposedly cheap...

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"Somebody Just Fucking Died, and You Will Never See Them Again" Not a Phrase Likely to Replace "Celebration of Life" at Funeral Services

Funny story: "Somebody Just Fucking Died, and You Will Never See Them Again" Not a Phrase Likely to Replace "Celebration of Life" at Funeral Services

A new study released by the International Institution of Profoundly Good, Superior, and Extremely Wonderful Information released a confidential report last Thursday indicating that the harsh realities of life will continually be covered up by lies, d...

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Funeral Service to be Held at St. Bob's Next Week

With loads of horrible sadness, despair, and unfathomable amounts of depression wreaking pure and unholy havoc on his heart and his mind, Roger Mann, 34, took an elevator to the top floor of an abnormally tall building last Thursday. Believing...

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Man Unexpectedly Drops Dead While Pre-Planning His Funeral

Funny story: Man Unexpectedly Drops Dead While Pre-Planning His Funeral

GRANTS LICK, KY-Jason Moribund, 57, a lifelong resident of northern Kentucky, was pre-planning his funeral at Swindler and Curry Funeral Home last Friday night when he suddenly dropped dead of a heart attack. The owner of the funeral home, C...

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Grandma Would Have Loved Her Funeral Say Family And Friends

Funny story: Grandma Would Have Loved Her Funeral Say Family And Friends

90 Year old Mary Hall, according to friends and family, would have just loved the funeral arranged by her sons; which by all accounts was a sombre yet tasteful funeral, attended by more than 300 mourners from across the country. The only downside,...

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On A Lighter Note: More People Are Being Cremated Today!

Funny story: On A Lighter Note: More People Are Being Cremated Today!

"Lighter note huh? You news people think the whole world is one big happy home don't you? Well, I deal day in and day out with dead people and cleaning them up, placing a cotton ball with alcohol up their wazzoo and draining them dry so what so humorous about that?" After telling Mr. Clay we only were there to ask him and his staff.. "Did you say 'Stiff'?" "No. I said staff. The people wh...

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Man Declared Dead Days Before Suddenly Wakes Up in Morgue

Funny story: Man Declared Dead Days Before Suddenly Wakes Up in Morgue

A man has amazed doctors and workers at a hospital by waking up after being declared dead two days before. The family had waited till several family members could arrive to hold the funeral in Nairobi, Kenya. Meanwhile a worker at the morgue b...

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Nelson Mandela to be buried in portions to give everyone a chance to attend funeral

Funny story: Nelson Mandela to be buried in portions to give everyone a chance to attend funeral

Nelson Mandela is to be buried in 365 separate "portions" to enable well wishers to each have a chance to attend his sell-out funerals. Advertising slots for the year long T.V. funeral coverage have been fully booked since before he died. Merchandisi...

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Vicar Leads Funeral Flash Mob

Funny story: Vicar Leads Funeral Flash Mob

Recently deceased Trevor Endeavor got his loved ones dancing in the aisles by putting a twist on his traditional funeral service. Fun-loving Trevor found the perfect partner to make his dreams of a Thriller-themed funeral come true - The Rever...

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Convicted war criminal scrounges free funeral for mum

Funny story: Convicted war criminal scrounges free funeral for mum

A man convicted for his part in an attempted coup in Equatorial Guinea has managed to get a lavish funeral for his mother on the Tax Payer. Mark Thatcher who backed the 2004 coup led by close friend Simon Mann has managed to get a £15m ceremonial...

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London Marathon Cancelled

Funny story: London Marathon Cancelled

The 2013 Virgin London Marathon due to be run this Sunday has been cancelled at short notice. The event which raises millions of pounds for charity as well as being a showcase for top international athletes has fallen victim to a lack of available po...

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Lady Thatcher not buried

Funny story: Lady Thatcher not buried

Lady Thatcher will not be buried in the foreseeable future minister's claim. Several noted undertakers have been contracted but have returned the body without explanation. A countrywide search has been made to find a funeral service willing to...

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Local Man Threatens Scathing You Tube Skit Following Funeral Fiasco

Funny story: Local Man Threatens Scathing You Tube Skit Following Funeral Fiasco

A local man has threatened to respond to what he described as "the ultimate insult" by performing in a You Tube skit - impersonating his own brother. And making him look a right 'twat'. Martin Shuttlecock, a dashingly handsome and pioneering satir...

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Funeral car caught speeding on by-pass

A speed trap captured a hearse doing a very nippy 107 mph along a dual carriageway near Slough. Traffic wardens had spotted it earlier doing 50mph along a street with 'Dead Slow' signs. When stopped and questioned by police officers, the driver of...

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Local Man Describes Meeting With Funeral Director

Funny story: Local Man Describes Meeting With Funeral Director

Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, still in a state of mourning following the death of his father last week, today described how he visited a funeral director in order to make arrangements for the impending cremation. "I went to the registraer's office yesterday to register the death," Shuttlecock said. "They give you a green sheet which confirms certification of death, and grants legal permission...

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Funeral Reawakening strikes fear into those nearest to us

Funny story: Funeral Reawakening strikes fear into those nearest to us

A funeral in Brazil was held up as a woman claimed the corpse had squeezed her hand. Maria Neymar Ronaldo Cesar said: "I leant in to say goodbye to Grandmamma and she squeezed my hand. I shouted for them to switch the furnace off and we called a a...

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Quentin Kelp MP - My Funeral Arrangements

Dear Constituents I have had a hectic but very depressing few days that has left me questioning my policy towards a certain subject that I normally try not to contemplate - death. I'm sorry to sound morbid first thing on a morning but I need to share some most private thoughts with you so please don't forward this email without my permission. I wouldn't want any old Tom, Dick or Harry thinki...

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Funeral homes: the new Starbucks

In the midst of dwindling sales at home and stiff competition from other coffee shop chains, Starbucks management have recently turned to growth regions such as Asia to open up new stores while closing several existing shops in North America and Euro...

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