Is your water on fire? What? NO! Why not? Here, at Halliburton, we can show you how to drill and turn water into fire. Fire is what helped Mankind evolve, so fire good, yes? The company once employed Dick “the Slick Trick” Cheney and is now re…
It is the new beauty treatment that literally everyone wants. Have you ever dreamed of having perfect skin, with no moles, freckles or unsightly gob craters? Well now that dream is within reach with facial fracking. The procedure is simple - i...
Lancashire County Council have agreed that fracking should not take place in their area of jurisdiction but democracy means that the views of Lancashire County Council are irrelevant. This new concept of democracy is being promoted because it is i...
Irving, Texas - A hydraulic fracturing trade association is bidding to take over large parts of the Vatican's hocus pocus division after the Pope fingered the global fossil fuel industry for turning the planet into a 'pile of filth'. Executives at...
Beijing, China - Vast crude reserves beneath Mount Everest are being harvested by the head of Tibetan Buddhism's hydraulic fracturing operations triggering earthquakes and aftershocks. According to the Beijing-based Who Flung Dung investigative t...
A new vaping company has come on the market that provides its users with atomic-borne, fracking-waste emissions instead of the water vapor used by traditional vaping horns. Vape Rape LLC, headquartered outside Wheeling, W.Va. on a rezoned piece o...
Almost all conspiracy theories have turned out to be true, according to an investigation commissioned to find out the truth about what everyone is really pretending to do. The report, secretly published as an apparent maintenance tender form for the...
CALIFORNIA - Using millions of gallons of water and secret chemicals harmful to people, the environment and the earth, oil and gas companies crack open underground rock formations, forcing deposits of oil and gas tucked deep within the earth up to th...
Associated Press- Hydraulic fracturing or "fracking" is the process of drilling and injecting dangerous fluid into the ground at high pressure in order to fracture shale rocks to release natural gas inside. President Obama has said that natural ga...
Los Olivos, California - Executors marketing Michael Jackson's estate have received a $100m bid for Neverland from reclusive Colorado Springs entrepreneur 'Mr F Racking'. Described by Forbes That's Rich! list as a self-made mover 'n' shaker Racki...
Washington - The post of Official White House Mole Catcher has just been made redundant according to Big Oil drone footage around Pennsylvania Avenue. A series of seismic jerks in the DC area - and no, we're not talking Kerry Kennedy this time! -...
Denver, Colorado - An estimated half a million happy puffers at Denver's first entirely legit 4/20 marijuana festival were accused of wanton destruction of the earth's ozone layer today. World Fracking Council inspectors on a comparison exercise m...
Nevada Desert - Lunar archaeologists at NASA's Area 51, Roswell HQ are studying images of what looks like a perfectly preserved antediluvian fracking rig parked on the crude-rich Mare Tranquillitatis basin. Dozens of pictures relayed by satellite...
Although the size of the earthquakes are not too large, except the one in Los Angeles, the United States has been shaken by a record number of quakes and aftershocks this past month. Other parts of the world have been hit hard also so what is goin...
Tel Aviv - The hydraulic fracturing of rocky deposits close to the 1949 Armistice 'Green Line' using pressurized liquid truth serums is under consideration by Israel's secret service according to reports out today. Months of satellite imagery int...
A Chevron well in the preparation stages for hydraulic fracturing exploded last Tuesday 50 miles south of Pittsburgh, Penn., causing a fire that lasted for four days and left one Chevron contractor unaccounted for and another one injured. Fracking...
Oil reserves in shale deposits underneath 90% of the U.K. can be extracted cheaply and would boost the economy of the country beyond our wildest dreams, said an energy spokesperson this morning. "But by the time everybody has stopped whingeing and ob...
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