SAN FRANCISCO, California (ABSNN) - The City Board of Supervisors of San Francisco voted 6-5 Tuesday to prohibit Bay Area residents ever again getting nekkid. Even showering in the nude is now a felony crime. "All forms of nekkidness is hereby and...
SIOUX FALLS, SD (ABSNN) - Richard Nixon cheated to beat him out of the Presidency, but George McGovern made it to Heaven while Tricky Dickey remains a smoldering charcoal briquette in Hell. McGovern died yesterday at the age of 90. He remained, to...
SEATTLE, Washington (ABSNN) - Voters are poised to pass Washington State Initiative 502, a law that will allow licensed pot shops to sell taxed and inspected marijuana. When passed by voters there will no longer be a state penalty for smoking dope.
VATICAN CITY (ABSNN) - It is a fake, the papyrus fragment that claims Jesus was married, that is. According to today's issue of the Vatican's newspaper, L'Observatore Romano, "Substantial reasons would lead one to conclude that the papyrus is inde...
CONVENT OF THE QUEER, WV (ABSNN) - The face of Republican Presidential nominee, Mitt Romney, "miraculously appeared" on a urinal mint, in the toilet of the Monk's Quarters, in this small Jesuit Convent tucked away in the foothills of west-central Wes...
TORNADO WV (ABSNN) - President Barack Obama revealed his "abnormal fear of clowns," a fear that he's suffered since early childhood. The President revealed this in a Beer Pong interview with Fr. Francois Dubois, S.J. at the Jesuit Convent of the Que...
Editor's Note: President Barack Obama not only drinks beer (like a regular Joe); he brews beer in the White House. This so intrigued Fr. Francois Dubois, S.J., Political-Sex Writer for theSpoof.com, that he wrote to the President to invite him for an interview to run here--And to play Beer Pong at the Convent of the Queer, in Goldang, West Virginia. The President accepted. What follows is the...
Warning - This article contains profanity - whatever the fuck that is - in abundance. The Editorial team apologize like motherfuckers for that. Please accept our motherfuckin' editorial apologies. Ass holes... Controversial West 'By God' Virginia...
Controversial cleric, Monsignor Francois DuBois SJ, of West 'By God!' Virginia, in the Disunited States of Americky, today sparked a major international diplomatic controversy as he was sent packing by UK immigration authorities at London's Heathrow...
The Vatican is busy putting a spin on the Pope's recent edict that condoms are 'a little bit of all right...sometimes", after a retired Jesuit Priest took the proclamation a little too far and wound up pleasuring his female neighbors in the Nort...
Huntington, West 'By God!' Virginia Sheriff's Department today confirmed that hell raising former Jesuit priest Monsignor Francois DuBois has been placed under house arrest again. Mainly for being 'meddlesome' and 'causing trouble.' This isn't...
The City of Huntington, West Virginia Police Department has issued an all points bulletin to be on the lookout for a Jesuit Priest who has not yet gotten the hang of his brand new mobility power scooter. So far, the scooter-happy priest has mown thro...
HOG JAW, ARKANSAS (ABSNN) -- Jesus was always known to have a funny story with which to illustrate His otherwise, insane agenda of Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men (but not to Yankees, faggots, harlots, thieves, communists, Mad Dogs and Englishmen, th...
LONDON (ABSNN) -- The Man With the World's Smallest Penis has a large following. Spoof writer, Skoob1999, has called the World's First Congress of Men With Itty-bitty Penises to take place in London beginning June 14th. HRH Prince Charles will ch...
Today's subject is sexual positions Dear Msr. Dubois: I am a 19-year-old junior at University of Georgia in Athens. I lost my virginity last week (or at least I think I did) at the Delta's keg party. It wasn't at all what I expected, having to stand up in a broom closet while my date ripped down my panty hose and kept jabbing at my crotch. Finally, he asked me if he could stick his finger...
Saf"er" Sex -- That's the ticket! Dear Monsignor Dubois: You helped me so much the last time I wrote you for advice, so I thought I'd get your take on my special problem. I know you won't reveal what I say to you, not to anybody, right? Well, last week I picked up this little chippie in the parking lot behind my house. We hit it off really well, and I convinced her to come back to my fl...
VATICAN CITY (ABSNN) -- TheSpoof.com's ace Religion reporter, Skoob1999, filed this dispatch this morning following an exclusive interview with Pope Bentedick XVI: "Ja, I'm pissed off that JPII got off so easily by up and dying five years ago. Th...
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