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Funny story: FA New Fairplay Scheme: Teams That 'Should Have Won' To Be Awarded All Three Points

FA New Fairplay Scheme: Teams That 'Should Have Won' To Be Awarded All Three Points

The Football Association has announced that, in order to "address the perceived unfairness in domestic football", it will introduce a new scheme whereby teams that 'should have won' will be awarded the three points. The scheme will be operated by...

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Funny story: PFA say FU to FA rule changes!

PFA say FU to FA rule changes!

Since UEFA and FIFA announced their new ABBA penalty tiebreaker shootout system, the FA have decided that now's a good time to unveil some rule changes of their own. The first notable change will be the introduction of a select panel of judges who...

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Funny story: Stuart Pearce livid at being branded a 'Baboon'

Stuart Pearce livid at being branded a 'Baboon'

Sky Sources (Mustard & Ketchup) believe that football officials have confirmed that they will be launching an inquiry into Stuart Pearce's red card and touch-line ban. Pearce reacted to alleged racist abuse from home fans by kicking a football...

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Funny story: Twonk Tweets 'Twats' to Tits then Told off

Twonk Tweets 'Twats' to Tits then Told off

Ashley Cole has been charged with bringing the game into disrepute/improper Conduct over his abusive tweets towards the FA. Cole is said to be devastated at his life being turned upside down and having his good reputation besmirched. The Chelsea l...

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Funny story: Engand football team move to third in world rankings

Engand football team move to third in world rankings

Wembley HQ, England: With Team GB consolidating their third position in the Olympic tables, now it is time to shout a big "Hurrah" for the England Football team, who are third best at infighting, shagging each others wife's, getting boo'ded at by th...

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Funny story: Oxlade-Chamberlain hit with 'Bringing Game into Disrepute' charge

Oxlade-Chamberlain hit with 'Bringing Game into Disrepute' charge

Football authorities have announced today that Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain is to face a charge of 'Bringing the Game into Disrepute'. The charge, relating to interviews given to ITV and the BBC after England's Euro 2012 draw with France, is expected t...

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Funny story: National Anthem to replace all run out tunes

National Anthem to replace all run out tunes

With 2012 being the year of the Olympics and the Queen's Diamond Jubilee, it has been decided by the FA that every single football club in the country will ditch their current, and in some cases, iconic, run out tunes and replace it with the National...

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Funny story: F.A. may drop penalty shoot-outs

F.A. may drop penalty shoot-outs

At last night's Annual General Meeting of the Football Association (F.A.), there was heated discussion about whether to abolish penalty shoot-outs at the end of major cup final games. Penalty shoot-outs were originally used to give strikers and go...

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Funny story: Pierluigi Collina parachuted in for secret FA talks

Pierluigi Collina parachuted in for secret FA talks

London - Of course, bagging the top England job would mean the retired Italian refereeing ace having to give up a reported $2 million per annum Japanese TV job advertising frozen takoyaki** products. "But hey, the FA gotta mucha better multi-milli...

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Funny story: Betting Suspended on Harry Redknapp to be next England manager

Betting Suspended on Harry Redknapp to be next England manager

Bookmakers stopped taking bets today on Harry Redknapp to be the next manager of the England football team when reports of large bets were being placed around the country - including Portsmouth, Bournemouth, London, Leicester and Sheffield. The FA...

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Funny story: Carry On Up The Capello.

Carry On Up The Capello.

John Terry has paid tribute to Fabio Capello and expressed his personal regret at losing the England captaincy . "The eyetie stood down in protest at how the FA treated me. I expect everyone in the country to follow his example and resign from th...

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Funny story: Fabio Capello 'may have breached contract' says Derek Derekson

Fabio Capello 'may have breached contract' says Derek Derekson

Fabio Capello may have breached his 6 squillion lira contract with the Football Association by telling an Italian radio station he has asked the mafia to fix the Euro 2012 tournament so England can win. An FA insider told the spoof sports desk "Th...

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Funny story: Premiership vs Bundesliga players Match Arranged for 2012

Premiership vs Bundesliga players Match Arranged for 2012

The match is to take place at the Wembley Stadium, owned by the FA, through their subsidiary Wembley National Stadium Ltd (WNSL), to which many MP's are shareholders and advisors, later in 2011. The inspiration for such a competitive match came fr...

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Funny story: Palace 'tip-off' behind England black armbands deal

Palace 'tip-off' behind England black armbands deal

London - Someone in Buckingham Palace has had a strong hunch that the Queen might kick the bucket this weekend just as the England football squad lines up against Spain in a friendly. The premonition has seen players issued with black armbands ahe...

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Funny story: Footballers too stupid to understand concept of racism, report finds

Footballers too stupid to understand concept of racism, report finds

Premier league footballers are to be exonerated for their verbal controversies following the revelation that they are too inherently stupid to understand the literary connotations of what makes a given combination of words racist, a new study has fou...

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Funny story: FA Wayne Rooney Appeal, "Give Wayne a FIVE match ban!"

FA Wayne Rooney Appeal, "Give Wayne a FIVE match ban!"

FA Headquarters, Wembley, LONDON: Following the shock decision to 'ave our main striker Wayne 'Roonstone' Rooney, banned for three matches after his alleged lashing out at opposition forces, The FA have been deliberating whether to appeal against th...

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Funny story: The late Osama Bin Laden in running for FIFA presidency

The late Osama Bin Laden in running for FIFA presidency

Just when Sepp Blatter thought it was safe to deposit slush-hush money in his Swiss bank account, a late, second candidate has blown in and declared himself for the controversial presidency of international football association FIFA. The late Osam...

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