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Funny satire stories about Food

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Enlightening: Former Magazine Eaters Reveal why Alien (1979) Made Them Quit Eating Magazines Forever.

Back in the day, you could walk down the street and see hundreds of people happily devouring their tasty paper treats. Listening to the groans of them as they tried their best to breathe through the crevices in the paper. These days, you barely ever...

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(Former) Vegan YouTube Star Returns to Eating Eggs and Fish Due to Abnormally Low Cholesterol, Mercury and Arsenic Levels

Funny story: (Former) Vegan YouTube Star Returns to Eating Eggs and Fish Due to Abnormally Low Cholesterol, Mercury and Arsenic Levels

To the immense disappointment of his vegan fans around the world, YouTube star and former plant-based advocate Leif Burke announced that, due to health concerns regarding his abnormally low cholesterol, mercury, and arsenic levels, he has again begun...

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Man Terrified By Soft And Dreary 1980s Music And 20 Dollar Salads After Trying To Go "Organic"

Funny story: Man Terrified By Soft And Dreary 1980s Music And 20 Dollar Salads After Trying To Go "Organic"

Tom Norton, 48, of La Crosse, Wisconsin, experimented with the idea of going "organic" last week, after promising himself that he would let go of Walmart-purchased pot pies, microwavable spaghetti dinners, corned beef hash, processed cheese curds, ha...

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Man buys fish

An unidentified man was seen walking into a shop this week, whereupon he bought a fish. The man, dressed in a grey hoodie top, blue jeans and dark brown leather shoes, was observed at approximately 7pm on Saturday 23rd October, entering the shop...

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It's Christmas Crackers, Your Taste Buds Under Attack

Funny story: It's Christmas Crackers, Your Taste Buds Under Attack

What is it with retailers? They seem to think that the mid-winter celebration of the birth of some bloke in Palestine gives them carte blanche to assault our taste buds with all sorts of concoctions we wouldn't think of touching at any other time of the year. You know what I mean: sherry, Bailey's Irish Cream, crème de menthe and snowballs for god's sake. Our award-winning French Food & Dri...

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Cannibals To Be Looked After Post-Brexit With Stockpiling of Human Body Parts

Funny story: Cannibals To Be Looked After Post-Brexit With Stockpiling of Human Body Parts

People who eat people will "not be forgotten about" after Brexit, sources say. Following the revelations earlier this year from Brexit minister Dominic Raaaaab that the Government is stockpiling food and medicine in case of a No Deal, it has now b...

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Man Had One Thought On His Mind: Baked Beans

Funny story: Man Had One Thought On His Mind: Baked Beans

A man who has spent much of the last ten years of his life away from his native England, had only one thought on his mind last night: Baked Beans! The man, Moys Kenwood, 55, left the UK in 2009, and, during his time spent abroad, first in Thailand...

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Clean Up in Aisle One

Funny story: Clean Up in Aisle One

My Ami, Florida—Pubix, a Florida grocery chain, has posted signs outside its stores: no dogs allowed (unless they are trained service dogs) and no dogs allowed in or on grocery carts (even if they are trained service dogs). The problem is that the do...

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Fried Egg Was Cooked Too Long For Man's Liking

Funny story: Fried Egg Was Cooked Too Long For Man's Liking

An egg that was pan-fried in sunflower oil until the yolk was a pale yellow color, which could then be "bitten and chewed", had been cooked for too long, in one man's opinion. The egg, served to Moys Kenwood, 55, by his wife as part of a sausage,...

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Local Pie Thief located, killed in violent shootout

After weeks of investigation local man Lawerance Oddert, father of three, was killed in a violent shootout with police after stealing a pie that was cooling on old Miss Tennanbaums window sill. The police first started suspecting Oddert when he refus...

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Too Many Cooks Spoilt Broth

Funny story: Too Many Cooks Spoilt Broth

There were concerns for the future of an ancient Scottish hotel, as well as for the safety of its staff this morning, when it was revealed that guests there had staged a violent protest after having eaten the establishment's special hotel-made soup,...

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Staple Found In Chocolate Bun

Funny story: Staple Found In Chocolate Bun

A man in Battambang who was enjoying a cup of tea after his evening meal last night was shocked to find that the bun that he was eating along with his brew contained a foreign body - a staple. Moys Kenwood, 54, was halfway through the chocolate bu...

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"Ptomaine Romaine" Scare Threatens Lettuce Growers Everywhere

With the E. coli outbreak that infected one variety of Arizona's lettuce crop now seemingly at an end, the Farm Bureau has urged all concerned to romaine calm. However, the fallout from the crisis has had a devastating financial impact on the entire...

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Local Hospital Opens Another Shitty Food Court

Funny story: Local Hospital Opens Another Shitty Food Court

Local Hospital, Last Resort Methodist, has opened its second food court in an effort to get more patients into the hospital. “The first food court didn’t have enough disease in their food. This time, with options like McFryBird and Lard Cow, we’r...

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Restaurant Was 'Uncontaminated By Food'

Funny story: Restaurant Was 'Uncontaminated By Food'

A potential diner was left disappointed and hungry last night, when the Bangkok restaurant, at which he intended to take his répast, told him they were 'out of food', leaving him speechless and dinnerless. Moys Kenwood, 51, had gone to the Big C F...

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Carnivorous Weightlifter Finds a "Vegan" Diet that Works for Him

Funny story: Carnivorous Weightlifter Finds a "Vegan" Diet that Works for Him

Eight months ago, 380-pound competitive powerlifter Craig Ramey, in a quest to pack on more muscle, adopted an entirely carnivorous diet, consisting solely of meat and eggs, occasionally coupled with cheese. That, together with a rigorous steroid reg...

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Hull Man Has To Do Without Toast After He Runs Out Of Bread

Funny story: Hull Man Has To Do Without Toast After He Runs Out Of Bread

An Englishman living in the Cambodian city of Battambang has told how he had to go without toast for his breakfast this morning after he ran out of bread, and forgot to buy some more from the supermarket. Moys Kenwood, 54, originally from Hull in...

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North Korean Restaurant Opens Next to Trump Tower: Receives Worm-Free Reviews

Funny story: North Korean Restaurant Opens Next to Trump Tower: Receives Worm-Free Reviews

New York. In an unprecedented move, a North Korean restaurant called the Fire and Fury opened in a vacant building right next to Trump Tower last weekend to massive, hungry crowds. Some of New York's more sophisticated diners undoubtedly were dra...

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