As people across the country are starting their new year diets, one woman has found a hilarious and original way to eat chocolate and stick to her diet by posting on Fakebook 'Look everyone, having my five a day, LOL' accompanied by a photo of a half…
As millions of Brits are feeling flabby after the Christmas break, one man has taken the revolutionary step of announcing his new fitness regime. Kevin Sponge, 46, said, 'Yes, I know I've said this every year since 2004, but this time it's going t…
A 27 year old woman has been forced to give up Rumbacize after contracting ammonia poisoning from the smell of piss in the air at classes and becoming middle aged. “Of course I’d seen the Tena Lady adverts,” Clitora Flange said. “I just didn’t th…
After buying a set of dumbells in the first lockdown, Gary Johnson regrets buying a second set, as he lost the first set. 'Now I have two sets of dumbells, and I regret buying the first one' said the easily confused chap. 'I couldn't believe it…
Chutney on the Fritz's most famous inhabitant Brian Asshat has been complaining about the efforts of Athletes, as he always does. The mildly obese thrower of shoes gets slightly breathless in his garden but still likes to believe that he could hav…
In keeping with medical advice that everyone should take regular exercise, and taking advantage of the opportunity that the Coronavirus lockdown has provided him with, one man in his 'twilight years' has decided to 'get with the program', and to star…
It's the exercise video that nobody thought would get released. Before he died, Joy Division's lead singer Ian Curtis recorded a thirty-minute exercise routine compiled from live performances where he shows how he keeps in shape. Entitled "Ian Cur...
"Stop calling me that!" railed handsome and inordinately well-muscled vegan bodybuilder Jack Henry Chadwick after one of his friends - for the umpteenth time - referred to him as a "beefcake." "It's not funny!" he added, only accelerating the chuc...
A TV advertisement for a 'Nordic Walking' exercise machine involving several supremely fit-looking individuals whose healthy, energetic and confident demeanor resembled that of some sort of 'Master Race', has attracted the attention of a man in Tapon...
San Jose, CA - Riding the wave of the rise in popularity of fitness trackers, one popular fitness-tracking company is set to release its latest product, The ShitFitBit, which is designed to keep track of all your crazy toddler's shit-fits. "Many f…
Santa Monica, CA - One of L.A.'s most popular yoga studios has invented a very unique way to solving it's green house gas output - by harnessing farts! "I was in the middle of leading a Hot Bikram class through downward-dog poise," tells Raven Bra...
The Ballast diet has taken the international slimming world by storm. Below is a transcript of a recent, rare radio interview with its creator, Professor Swan Morrison, in which he discusses the scheme in unprecedented detail. ~*~*~*~*~*~ 'Hello Professor Morrison and welcome to the Breakfast Radio Show.' 'Thank you for inviting me onto your programme.' 'You've invented a revolutionar...
The fitness industry is a huge marketplace, drawing countless Americans - a full two-thirds of whom are overweight - into spending billions of dollars annually in the hopes of becoming healthier, fitter, or simply less fat. Unfortunately for health-h...
According to the latest buzz from health clubs and fitness gurus, the formerly wildly popular Paleo Diet has been supplanted by the new Sociopath or "Socio" Diet, which skyrockets meat-centric eating to new dimensions of amorality. Sources say the Socio Diet has particularly caught fire in high-power urban centers like New York City and Washington, D.C. Want to incorporate some "Socio" into you...
Crossfit, one of the latest fitness crazes in the last few years has gained popularity all over the nation. Now pint sized little power houses are able to join in on the craze by participating in the training as well. Toddler level crossfit classes...
4:30am - CHICAGO - Consumers anxiously line up at local sporting stores to be the first persons to purchase Under Armor's newest product, The Commitment Shirt®. Featuring the company's latest technology, which promotes muscle growth for the...
In a bizarre sequence of events, Paul Ryan, Mitt Romney's former Vice-Presidential running mate, has decided to resign from federal politics to open up a local fitness center in Janesville, Wisconsin. Many Washington insiders are puzzled by the unpre...
Get Spoof News in your email inbox!
We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.
