A home owner's association in the north - eastern United States performed the nation's first such execution today at 5:38 a. m. Eastern Standard Times. Residents gathered at the community's basketball court with coffee, fast - food breakfast sand…
The world's first eco-friendly execution centre has just opened at The Sunny Wind Farm Company in Quakerville, Pennsylvania. Chad and Chuck Cadbury shook while explaining their vision: ‘Our wind turbines often generate excess electricity, and it…
In a move which even Franz Kafka would have had trouble making sense of, US legislators have today passed a law to ease the lengthy deportation process involving illegal migrants, dispensed with immigration hearings, and given the green light to summ...
Dangling on African gallows can sometimes be a 'lifesaver' because hangmen in many African countries are demanding their midday nap and higher pay! One African country has now re-introduced the guillotine to stop dangling, dastardly poachers, crim...
Little Rock, AR--Besides being known for its high incidence of early death, infant mortality, cardiovascular disease, and obesity, Arkansas may soon break a new record, and possibly get into the 2018 Guinness Book of World Records in the attempt.
A seven-year-old drug mule is due to be executed later this evening three months after an Irish drug smuggling cartel was caught smuggling cocaine out of Thailand. The Galway based gang was busted earlier this year in Bangkok after custom's offici...
Lincoln, Nebraska - Despite the fact that Governor Pete Ricketts' veto to repeal the death penalty was overridden by Nebraskan State Senators, Ricketts has promised to continue with executions. In his first attempt, he made a deal with an undergr...
Mo Goldstein of The Dallas Star asked Perry why he was switching from lethal injection to The Guillotine and he replied: "Well Mo I want to avoid all this controversy about whether legal Injection is too cruel for these baby rapers and other violen...
Following the botched execution of death row inmate Clayton Lockett, Oklahoma Governor Mary Fallin announced that she will support legislation extending the Humane Slaughter Act, which has previously applied only to farm animals, to human prisoners.
Omar Ahmad (CAIR President), Nihad Awad (CAIR Secretary & Treasurer), and Rafeeq Jaber (CAIR Vice President) and Ibrahim Hooper (Communications Director) were named to head the Obamacare Sunset panel, which is more commonly known as the Death Pan...
LONE STAR, TEX ASS - "We had good reason to execute Carlos DeLuna," Warden Hank Williams said. "He was the spitting image of the killer, he had the same first name, and was near the scene of the crime at the fateful hour. Besides, he deserved to die.
The Beeb are planning on copying China TV's sensational hit called; Execution TV. A roving female reporter travels around the local prisons interviewing prisoners before their death sentences are carried out and in China she had to be quick. Once the...
WASHINGTON, D.C.--With two executions this week, the U.S. has recorded a total of 46 government-sanctioned murders against citizens in 2011. Incidentally, the U.S. leads the Americas by the same number, as no other such country in the hemisphere a...
The conviction of serial killer Levi Bellfield in the Milly Dowler murder case has raised many fundamental questions about the propriety of the British legal system. Quite correctly, Milly's family members vociferously objected to having their liv...
Human Relations Occasionally magazine reporters today revealed that former office supervisor Claire Fullbright has been sectioned under the 'Not Quite Playing With A Full Deck' act after she cracked up at the offices of Hammer And Tongs in Kiddermins...
In a back to basics policy change David Cameron, Prime Minister, announced today the return of the death penalty in Great Britain. "To be fair the death penalty never came off the statute books", he said, "we are just extending the penalties where...
CNN is reporting that an Illinois manufacturer's decision to stop making the aesthetic sodium thiopental. This news is critical because this loss will delay some criminal executions that rely on lethal injections. It will force states to think outside the box and adopt other lethal techniques. Naturally, I have my ideas which are not only expeditious but cost-effective: * One hour viewing...
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