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Funny satire stories about Crime

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Trump Plans To Release American Criminals Along Length Of US/Mexico Border

Funny story: Trump Plans To Release American Criminals Along Length Of US/Mexico Border

Hamstrung by the Democrat Party's stubborn refusal to agree to the public funding of his Mexican Wall project, President Donald Trump has hatched a new idea to protect the country's precious southern border - he will release thousands of America's ow...

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Brazilian Misfits migrate to France

Funny story: Brazilian Misfits migrate to France

In his first six months as president, Emmanuel Macron insisted that France was a land for refugees, saying he wanted all of the Brazilian Misfits on the streets of Paris by the end of 2017. Now they wander through Paris scaring away tourists, and eat...

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Polyana Viana Teaches Man A Painful Lesson

Funny story: Polyana Viana Teaches Man A Painful Lesson

A man who tried to rob the MMA fighter, Polyana Viana, outside her apartment in Brazil, received his comeuppance in no uncertain terms, when the UFC competitor kicked the living shit out of him. Viana was outside her Rio de Janeiro home when the m...

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Serial Killer Solves Cold Case

Funny story: Serial Killer Solves Cold Case

Chester, PA. (WTFM) -- Early this morning, while digging a shallow grave intended to be the final resting place for his latest victim, serial killer Derek Flatt uncovered a shallow grave containing a victim of serial killer, Justin Crabwell. Crabwe...

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Police Arrest Gatwick Drone Operator

Funny story: Police Arrest Gatwick Drone Operator

Police at Gatwick Airport have made an arrest in connection with the drone that have grounded 765 flights and caused a shutdown of the facility over the last three days. Timmy Smith, aged 9, was taken to a police station early this morning after...

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Police Apologise for "Upsetting" Description of Man's Genitals

Funny story: Police Apologise for "Upsetting" Description of Man's Genitals

North Yorkshire Police have apologised for providing "too much detail" in a description of a man who performed a sex act in front of a woman in York. The force had said it was looking for a "fat, naked man" and described his sexual organs explicitly...

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Old-Testament God Creates 11th Commandment: “Thou Shalt Not Engage in Victim Blaming, You Sadistic Morons”

WASHINGTON D.C. - Emerging from the heavens amidst a flurry of lightning and ferocious winds, the Old-Testament God, commonly known as Yahweh, descended upon the United States Congress. “I am the Lord thy God,” Yahweh bellowed, shaking the ground...

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"999 What's Your Emer...Ah Fuck It"

A shocking new report has found that over one million crimes a year aren’t even investigated by the police. To people who enjoy stealing cheap bottles of cider, this is great news! But, for those of us who expect our law enforcement to do a semi comp...

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Gruesome Murder Reconstruction Ends In Gruesome Murder

Funny story: Gruesome Murder Reconstruction Ends In Gruesome Murder

Police supervising a TV documentary murder reconstruction of an unsolved slaying that happened 20 years ago, have egg on their faces this evening, after a second murder took place in exactly the same manner as the first one. In Epsom, back in 199...

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Parents In Call For Naughtiness To Be Criminalized

Funny story: Parents In Call For Naughtiness To Be Criminalized

Parents have reacted angrily to calls for a ban on smacking children in the home, by demanding that children be banned from acting naughtily, it has been reported. The Association of Educational Psychologists (AEP) has called for physical punishme...

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Mind Reader Told Crowd What They Were Thinking

Funny story: Mind Reader Told Crowd What They Were Thinking

In a case that is sure to have the science world unravelling, a man who claimed that he could 'read people's minds', and tell them exactly what they were thinking about, did just that. The man made the astonishing claim in front of a large crowd o...

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Shoplifting Now UK's Fastest-growing Industry

Funny story: Shoplifting Now UK's Fastest-growing Industry

There was brighter news for industry today, when it was announced that, despite poor performances in nearly all the UK's industry sectors, there was one major area of growth - shoplifting. Whilst energy, manufacturing, the services sector, financi...

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Local Pie Thief located, killed in violent shootout

After weeks of investigation local man Lawerance Oddert, father of three, was killed in a violent shootout with police after stealing a pie that was cooling on old Miss Tennanbaums window sill. The police first started suspecting Oddert when he refus...

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Manchester Woman Reporting Murder Was Given 'Police Crime Number'

Funny story: Manchester Woman Reporting Murder Was Given 'Police Crime Number'

A woman who reported what turned out to be a violent murder to police, was told by a switchboard operator that there were no officers available to attend to her 'situation', whereupon she was given a 'crime number'. The woman, who wishes to remain...

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Police Crackdown on Scooter Crime Angers Mums

Funny story: Police Crackdown on Scooter Crime Angers Mums

"Leave him alone, he's just a kid" screamed Clarissa de Pfeiffel-Johnson as her ten year old son Boris (no relation) was led into a police van in handcuffs. His crime was to be caught using a stolen scooter to carry out muggings on unsuspecting Londo...

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Little Girl's Bike Stolen From Outside House

Funny story: Little Girl's Bike Stolen From Outside House

There was trouble with a capital 'T' in Tapon this morning when it was discovered that a bicycle belonging to the daughter of a writer at satirical news website TheSpoof.com had been stolen. Delma Kenwood, 3, daughter of Moys Kenwood, loved that f...

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Carnivor Cruise Line to feature cannibalism on the high seas

Funny story: Carnivor Cruise Line to feature cannibalism on the high seas

Miami, FL - A new reality TV series will launch this fall documenting the adventures of vacationers braving voyages on the new Carnivor Cruise Line, producer Annibalcay Rossgay told us when we asked him what’s new. Vacationers sign a waiver that t...

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More gender controversy for Labour

Jeremy Corbyn's Labour party has again provoked controversy by suggesting more "women only" places in the interests of safety. Hot on the heels of the "Women only train carriages" controversy suggesting that all men are potential sex pests and wom...

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