Essential worker, Ben, was slightly taken aback one morning when he attempted to log on to his work computer and was greeted with a series of statements with which he had to agree before completing log-in. “It said things like, 'I’ve not had a fev...
Although Ray McGowan of Nashville, Tennessee, doesn’t like to ruffle feathers or cause offense, he admitted to secretly thinking that the modern world has gone a little crazy. “More than a little, if I’m really truthful,” he said. “Just between yo...
Desperate to prevent Americans from ignoring its half-hearted health recommendations altogether, the Food and Drug Administration authorized eating up to two Christmas cookies per day for the duration of the holiday season. "We encourage people to...
In a dramatic policy reversal, United States President, Donald Trump, instead of banning most flavored e-cigarettes, as he had previously pledged to do, issued a presidential pardon of e-cigarette company JUUL, relieving the vaping company of crimina...
WASHINGTON DC - It's often considered poor etiquette to "speak ill of the dead", and the staff of the Washington Post newspaper has gone the extra mile to show kindness when the Cold Hand of Death reached out on the field of battle. In this case, the...
Railing against suggestions by presidential candidate Bernie Sanders that its reporting might be biased by its ownership by Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos, Washington Post editor, Marty Baron, explained that Bezos generously allows Post journalists to operate...
Appealing to gardeners and parents alike, an international drug company recently introduced its new "Roundup-ready" baby aspirin, which will not only reduce the risk of clot-related strokes in those who take it, but will also provide protection again...
Automobile manufacturer, General Motors Company, headquartered in Detroit, recently admitted that, as an outlet for its mounting frustration regarding the failing economy and declining profits, the company has been engaging in the self-harming behavi...
According to global modern agricultural giant Monsanto Company, the grass is greener not on the other side, but when it's genetically modified - or so the company hopes. “It's wrong that people sometimes are forced to golf on browning blades of gr...
Interested in improving her health, Loretta Vincent of Portland, Oregon, recently incorporated pumpkin seeds into her diet - and she couldn't be more pleased with the results. With a wide variety of nutrients ranging from magnesium and manganese t...
To provide a framework for this story, let it be reported that In the U.S. people making an average of $75,000 pay an effective federal tax rate of 20%. But CEO Tim Crook has decided that Pear Corporation, makers of computers and smart phones doe...
"Our names are our destiny," is an old saying perhaps with some truth in it. it must be said that names given to newborns in America are fascinating, if not sometimes disconcerting. A fad of naming non-gender specific names has emerged in America...
Vatican City, Italy - God has given word to Pope Francis that he wants the pontiff to file a lawsuit in New Jersey's 2nd appellate court, claiming that Angel Soft toilet paper is guilty of defamation of character against his beloved angels. "God w...
The epic continues. Well hey... listen up. I'm gonna make you a deal. I'm not gonna tell you, you can't have that burger. I mean, hey... this is America, it's a free country! Well, technically it's not, but you know what I mean... Well, every time you eat a burger, just remember that the people... Sorry, the evil, unaccountable, impersonal, soulless corporations who eat burgers ar...
A recent "virulent" rant by Cenk Uygur has gone "viral" on Youtube... Oh, crap. Mere semantics again, isn't it? Anyways, have a look at this transcript. Responses on a snail-card please. Well, yeah, why not? After all highly eloquent and intellectually satisfying responses from Ted Nugent and Sarah Palin have already appeared... So don't be last in the race to the bottom. Still, wh...
After 3 years of intense study, 3,400 hours of revision and £26,000 of punishing debt, university graduates can now pat themselves on the back for making it this far in their mediocre lives. Brian Middleton spent 3 years at Warwick University stu...
The Crock Brothers, David and Charles, their wives (shunned by most of NY society because of right-wing extremist views of their husbands), and crew of the Leander, a 246-foot mega yacht that costs up to $500,000 per week to rent, have all been rescu...
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